Single adopters - how do you afford it?

[Chocolatesponge]

Could anyone share their experience of how they manage financially, please? I would love to adopt, but have a mortgage and would need to leave my current full time job, as i commute a long way and could not reduce my hours enough to actually spend any time with my child.

I'm prepared to do any job that fits in with school hours/term time, they just do not pay enough to cover the bills. I feel really disheartened. I want a family and there are children out there who need a parent, yet as a single person, i seem to be hit with every obstabcle.

I'm now considering fostering as at least i would have some sort of income that allowed me to have a family life, but adoption had always been my first choice.

I saved first, then I looked for a 4 day week job then I adopted. Then my own health and DS's issues (separation anxiety significantly worsened by my being ill) so I stopped working for a while, sold my house and downsized and now work for myself more flexibly but much poorer!

Don't regret it though.

I was lucky to owrk in a job well paid enough to save quite a bit which helped.

Thanks Kewcumber, it's interesting to hear how people manage and amazing what people manage can do to survive, as with your story.

I do have a decent amount of savings, but they would run out fairly quickly if i couldn't find a suitable job to fit in with school hours.

Hi I'm a single adopter. Just at the link/matching stage but I think you find a way. My finances weren't brilliant but for the past year every week of annual leave has included overtime/agency work, no foreign hols and lots of DIY!
Also kids need security which income brings but they don't need lots and lots of money, they need fun and love and a family.
As I get nearer to it becoming a reality I have got to the stage where daily someone brings me toys/clothes/pushchairs etc. also baby and children markets have been great for keeping costs down.
Just do you sums and then look at what you don't need and do them again until it works out. What was once important to me is no longer a priority.
I am lucky in that I currently work full time in a 3 or 4 day week shift that is flexible. I could go part time and pick up agency at key times if that were needed. Just explore every option!
I've also looked at every single bill in my house. Is it needed? Is it the cheapest option etc? The biggest challenge for me will be adoption leave but there's loads of free/cheap stuff to do. It doesn't have to be activities that charge! And I always hope that I may win the lottery too! But that's where my plan loses a level of reality! Good luck!

Don't lose hope - it just might need a bit of a longer term plan. When you are waiting the time goes so slowly but later on that is all forgotten.
I presume you have a spare room in which case, can you get a lodger in? That's what I did and it meant I could pay more towards the mortgage for the time before DD arrived. Then when she did the lodger went and I extended the term to bring the monthly payments down. Also did lots of shopping around to reduce utility bills etc.

You might get some benefits when you are on adoption leave (or after depending on whether or not the government has completely trashed the safety net by then). I got tax credits as well as statutory adoption pay while I was on leave - not enough to cover the mortgage but you can take a mortgage holiday for that year. Child benefit is about £80 a month which covers the gin, sorry, I mean nappies.

I moved from a job with a long commute to a shorter one and that made a huge difference in terms of time to spend with DD but may not be possible for you. Also went down to 4 days. Would your current job let you reduce your hours and/or work from home? They have to consider a flexible working request from a parent, although they don't have to consider it.

Nurseries and schools usually have some holiday cover - playschemes, afterschool clubs etc so I can manage the times when DD is off with my annual leave (just). It means long days for the child though and that won't work for all children, DD so far loves it and really enjoys being around other kids all day and then just the two of us at home.
Working tax credits can help towards childcare costs.

Also depends what kind of lifestyle you have now whether you will feel worse off or not - I basically spent everything I earned on god knows what but once DD arrived life changed completely - as a single parent you have to get a babysitter every time you need to get a haircut let alone go out on the town so money doesn't disappear as fast. You also become a supreme bargain hunter.

People will give you stuff like clothes and toys so you don't have to spend money on any of that. Depending where you live there are loads of free activities so you don't need to spend money on going out. And learn to love camping.

Good Luck

Tax credits make a big difference for me, especially for covering childcare. You can put endless scenarios into the tax credit calculator and see what you'd get www.gov.uk/tax-credits-calculator

Agree with Grimble that your outgoings do decrease in a lot of ways - those meals out / cinema / shopping trips etc you can have without a small person add up more than you realise!

I work part-time, 1 full day and 4 mornings, but not term-time only (sigh) so do have some childcare costs. I am lucky in that even before applying to adopt, I worked flexibly and can often work from home. I don't know whether I'll be able to continue this through LO's changing needs, so prior to adopting I looked into what would make me most marketable as a free-lancer. I needed one further qualification, so I am near to completing that just to keep my options open. I saved hard and used some of the savings to top up adoption pay, which made things more comfortable, but PPs are right - you do spend less. Apart from on children's shoes, which appear to be woven by fairies from the finest platinum

Depending on your timescale, and current career, if you can overpay on your mortgage even a little each month, that will all help to ease the pressure later on - either during adoption leave, or to give you a cushion if your child needs you to be there much more later on. Like Kew I downsized before applying to adopt, because there's no denying this is a bit of a scary undertaking financially. The car is quite old, holidays are few and far between, and a favourite outing is probably the library - but we are happy!

Oh yes tax credits have been a life saver at times.

And I got a lot less fussy about shoes - Clarkes got ditched!

Car is (literally) growing moss in places and holiday are camping (single with kids is good) or in family owned houses or paid for by kind parents on the proviso they come with us.

Thanks so much for your replies, ladies, they really mean so much to hear how you have all managed! I'm quite good with money and don't feel that i over spend on personal/leisure things, i really just need to look at the job issue and decide if i could work part time and still manage my bills - at the moment it doesn't seem possible, even with tax credits, but i will keep trying to make this work.