Stage 2

[Bbmonster1]

Hi
Me & hubby have just been told that we will be having our end of stage one meeting, after an agonising wait with medicals (hubby has MS). All being well the rest if stage one will be fine, we just had financial and health & safety check. I was just wondering if anybody has gone through stage 2 and could compare it to stage one for us e.g is it more difficult to pass than stage one? We just seemed to hit hurdle after hurdle. Thanks in advance x

[64x32x24]

Depends what kind of things you find hard!

I 'enjoyed' the prep group in stage one but hated the rest of it - lots of agonising waiting around and encountering delays we couldn't do anything about.

Stage 2 was a lot more intense, with weekly home visits and homework to do in between, and lots of forms (we did health&safety forms and financial stuff in stage 2); then suddenly another wait; then got draft PAR and had to turn it around (send back corrections and comments) within 48 hours; then another wait; then, finally, panel.

But I find stage 2 less stressful, as we were always communicating with SW, and kind of 'in control', and our progress through the steps was always very visible. Compared to stage 1 where we never knew what was happening (or indeed, if anything was happening) - stage 2 was quite easy.

But if you find it hard to talk about 'personal' things, you might find stage 2 harder!

Good luck!

[Bbmonster1]

ThankYou! I don't mind talking about personal stuff. We have done the prep group. I'm looking forward to stage 2, but a little apprehensive. It just seems to have been really difficult in stage one , and has already taken 6 months.

[CloserThanYesterday]

We found stage 2 much easier as well. For a start, we knew that we'd got through all the medical/financial checks we had been worrying about!
For the most part, stage 2 felt like an enjoyable trip down memory lane, talking about our childhoods and families. Obviously, there are some harder conversations too. It's quite intense, but in a good way as you feel like you're really doing something, and getting somewhere.
The hardest bit we've found is after approval panel, waiting for a match.

[CloserThanYesterday]

We found stage 2 much easier as well. For a start, we knew that we'd got through all the medical/financial checks we had been worrying about!
For the most part, stage 2 felt like an enjoyable trip down memory lane, talking about our childhoods and families. Obviously, there are some harder conversations too. It's quite intense, but in a good way as you feel like you're really doing something, and getting somewhere.
The hardest bit we've found is after approval panel, waiting for a match.

[CloserThanYesterday]

Oops, sorry.

Not sure how I managed to post that twice

[Bbmonster1]

Aaaaargh. We are not going to pass stage 1. I've just spoke to the SW and she said there are a number of issues in the medical report. They are coming to do health & safety check and financial checks as they have to before the manager makes a decision. I think it's awful. They should just tell us no now and not drag it out

[CloserThanYesterday]

Don't panic, Bb, we had medical issues too and they really just wanted learn more about them and how we proposed to cope, should anything go wrong. If you can show you've thought it all through properly and have a plan - for example if one of you can't work for a length of time - that might be all they need to know.

[Bbmonster1]

Hubby has MS and there has also been other problems with anxiety and depression. I'm just not getting s good vibe from the SW :(

[Bbmonster1]

Thursday coming. I'm so nervous. Just think it's cruel she would come do the rest of the checks when it's obvious we aren't going to pass . All them children needing a forever home & we could provide one with lots of love :(

[Bbmonster1]

That's what I initially thought, but when I spoke to her she said she has to complete all her checks before she can send it across to her manager who makes the final decision

[FamiliesShareGerms]

Sorry to hear you're being messed about Bb.

We had queries about our medical records (serves us right for being truthful about units of alcohol consumption!) but right at the very end of the process. It's worrying, isn't it.

Can you ask to speak to the manager ahead of Thurs? Things like the health and safety check are marginal really, as most things are fixable and the important bit is being prepared to do what's necessary (eg filling in the pond, replacing internal glass doors)

[HopefulDadToBe]

Bbmonster1 How did it go? x