Being home by a certain time

[Italiangreyhound]

I read something disturbing today about girls rushing home to be in 'by a curfew' and it sounds like they took a short cut and they stumbled into a bad neighbourhood. They were murdered by a gang. I know it is an extreme example. It may have happened years ago.

It just made me think that when we give our kids a 'curfew' to be home by, we should still make it clear that we expect them to stay safe, and that may mean taking the longer, safer route home and not cutting corners. That we will understand if they are late because they chose to stay safe.

This could be true for things like care on the roads too. If they are rushing because we said be home by a certain time then we should still expect them to take all care on the roads and crossing the roads.

It makes me think as parents we need to be clear with our kids what real safety is, not just doing what we want, by the time we want, but accessing every situation and taking the safe option rather than being dominated by time factors etc.

I am not yet at the stage of setting curfews or even 'be back by times' as my dd isn't yet at the stage of going out on her own, but I expect she soon will be.

Any tips on when children should be home by when they go out alone and at what stage you let your children go to friends etc by themselves?

[Italiangreyhound]

My kids are 3 and 9, and I know a lot of other 9 year olds would already be doing stuff alone but dd is dyslexic and finds it quite hard to think or more than one thing at a time so although she would know the way home, from local places, she might get easily distracted and not turn up for ages!

[UnderTheNameOfSanders]

I agree.

DD1 isn't quite getting to the point of being out late for parties and making her own way home yet, but we have already started talking to her about staying safe being the most important thing.
Not to get a lift home with a drunk driver just to be home on time,
not to take short cuts just to be home on time,
not to stay somewhere she feels unsafe just to save us from having to come and get her.

Whether when the time comes she'll remember all this is another matter, however often we repeat it.

DD2 is starting to go out without us, e.g. to local shop. This has been a reminder to me to stress stuff to her too. Thank you.

[Italiangreyhound]

Thanks Sanders. DD does not yet to shops on her own, there is one main road with a crossing but I know she would not use it as we do not use it as a family. It adds about 2 minutes to the journey. I feel silly we have not used it!

Glad I could be of use!