DD saw a mother slap her toddler yesterday. For no reason I can see at all she immediately said something along the lines of 'I bet that is how X & Y (her and DS's BMs) would have treated us and that is why we had to be adopted.'
When I asked her why she thought that she said because all parents of that nationality treat their kids like that. :(
(I live overseas and DDs are from a minority group in this country).
We did talk a little about this and how I didn't really, given her birth story, think that was likely to be the kind of person her BM is. I have a least one little story which reinforces her BM has shown interest/care for her that we are aware of since she was placed for adoption. She was left at the hospital after birth, so no history of physical abuse/violence or witnessing of it. So nothing in her personal history to make her feel this.
I'm concerned about the negativity it has unveiled over her feelings towards people here/birth parents and her possible confusion over reasons for adoption (generally she has a very good understanding of the reasons for her adoption and none of them are really negative - no abuse, neglect etc. Just a BM who was in no place to care for a baby). Am I over thinking all of this? WWYD? Drop it or try to talk more. Wait for her to raise it? What to say if anything at all?
thanks