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Original poster

Happy Mother's Day

16 replies

Lilka · 10/03/2013 13:48

To all the wonderful mums on this board :)

And also to all the mothers to be who going through the approval process, the mothers whose children can no longer live at home with them, to the mothers who have relinquished children for adoption, and everyone else reading as well

I hope you all have a good and peaceful day :) Thanks

ps. I have just received my very first grandma's day card Grin Okay the 10 month old scrumptious might not have written it herself but it's sooo sweet!!! I have got cards and a present from all three of my kids (I'm quite certain DD1 organised it!) even DD2 and she's not been so enamoured with me lately, plus a lovely cuddly lie in with DS. And DD1 and the scrumptious are coming over soon. Till the whole end of the day may this good stuff last Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
Lilka · 10/03/2013 17:03

Well that didn't last long :(

Not for this thread

Scrumptious DGD is just that. My little perfect bundle of lovely grand-baby :) Ah she's growing up so fast! Shock

OP posts:
Inthebeginning · 10/03/2013 17:37

Hi lilka,
Just been feeling a bit mopey sorry for myself as the whole world seems to be celebrating Mother's Day (and moaning about what their children have/haven't bought them) and your post cheered me up and made me think I am actually involved as potential iyswim. Thank you x

Original poster
Lilka · 10/03/2013 17:46

If you are going through the approval process now, Inthebeginning, there is a high chance that your little child is already here in this world, so in one way you are already a mother, and I'm sure you and your DC will find each other soon :) I'm glad my post helped, I remember approval process and it was a tough time x

OP posts:
Inthebeginning · 10/03/2013 17:51

Not yet lilka, going to get ourselves prepared and then start. Probably early autumn.
That is a really lovely thing to say though. I'm going to remember that x

Happiestinwellybobs · 10/03/2013 18:16

Last year Mothers's Day was the day before we met DD. I was so upset at first, then realised the same thing. I was her mummy already - she just hadn't met me yet :)

This year I started the day cleaning up sick as DD has been poorly, so not quite the Mother's Day I had imagined, but actually that's what it's all about :)

HappySunflower · 10/03/2013 20:35

Oh Inthebeginning, I remember spending so many Mother's Days feeling wistful, and sometimes tearful.
Then it hit me. I was a Mother, in my heart anyway, just at that point I was a Mother without a child. As are you, but it won't be this way for always :)

It's a scary thing to want so,etching so badly, isn't it?

Hope you've all had good days.

Kewcumber · 10/03/2013 21:30

I was woken at 6.50am. Cup of tea in bed. Presents and a handmade card, then DS made me breakfast in bed... a pancake with a lot of nutella - lucky I had the tea to wash it down. Then froze my arse off watching him play rugby then out with my mum for lunch.

Simple day, lovely day.

Sorry your day didn't end as well as it started Lilka.

Inthebeginning · 10/03/2013 22:00

It is happy yes. I knew today was going to be difficult so was prepared but it blooming caught me out this evening. :( fresh day tomorrow though and we are getting closer.

Devora · 10/03/2013 23:18

Happy Mothers Day to all the current and potential mothers on this thread Smile. Very nice of you, Lilka, to write such a warm and inclusive post - and I'm so sorry your own lovely day didn't last past teatime.

dd1 wrote me a poem that ended, "I love you so much, and that is a lot" Smile

Italiangreyhound · 10/03/2013 23:59

In the last two minutes of this day, which I know for so many is a really painful day, may I say that whether you made someone else a mum (which is all of us!), or whether you are now a mum, or will be a mum or are even thinking about becoming a mum, today is for us. For the pain and the fun, for the chocolates and the flowers and the sick, and the temperatures, and the picking out a pram and the picking out a care home.

Whatever stage you are at, in your journey with your mum, or you child or your dream, happy YOUR day.

Moomoomie · 11/03/2013 17:43

As usual I am late to the party. Grin
Glad the majority of you had a good day, I think for us as adoptive mums we do worry about others when it should be a day for us.
We had a good day, 3 lovely hand made cards, some gorgeous presents and a day at Ikea..... I know for some Ikea is their idea of hell, but we love it... Even if they have withdrawen the meatballs.Sad

Moomoomie · 11/03/2013 17:44

P.S Lilka, we are here if you want to tell us about it. So lovely that you had grand baby snuggles.

Original poster
Lilka · 11/03/2013 19:27

Devora, Kew...so glad you had a good day, and also to everyone else who had a good one :)

Thank you Moomoomie :) I ended up (after having a mini tantrum in my head and crying) Blush ranting on AIBU (and then to Kristina) because it was very quiet over here and I wanted to keep the thread about wishing everyone a good day not me unloading. DD2, her behaviour and me feeling inadequate.

Anyway, everyone else was lovely to me, and we had a nice mothers day meal cooked by SIL for me and DD1 (who got some pampering for her first mothers day) :)

OP posts:
Moomoomie · 11/03/2013 21:00

Oh Lilka, I've just read your thread from yesterday. How awful that you had to go through all that yesterday.
I have no advice, apart from to say keep at it, keep loving her, keep being the best mum for her( which you are)
I hope you are getting some help from Post Adoption Support.

HappySunflower · 12/03/2013 00:00

I had a nice but strange day. No cards or presents as my little one is too little :) but she was absolutely delightful, starting the day by creeping into my bed for a big cuddle!

Lilka, I am so sorry, that must have been such a dreadful shock for you to have read that. Sending you much love x

Italiangreyhound · 12/03/2013 08:08

I've looked on your other thread about this Lilka and there seems to be some very sound advice. I really hope you work through this. Keep on her side. Try and not let it pierce you. Can you grow a protective bubble for the time being around her and let her explore this phase and know that you are the one who has loved her so much. People can have two mums, so maybe one takes over for a bit, in her mind, but you are still there with her all the time, BM has not had all those lovely memories for last 8 years. Plus all those adolesent hormones in the mix. It is explosive, so try and stay calm and be the calm one. God Bless.

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