Thinking About Adopting... What criteria do I need to meet?

[BerryCheesecake]

The list I have in my head includes:

Stable job/steady income
House with a bedroom for child
A clean/welcoming home

Anything else that is a must? I am single and am not sure if they'll even consider me without a partner?

The only real criteria for adoption are the legal ones - over 21 and not committed violent crimes or crimes of a sexual nature. Also by SS policy, smokers won't be taken on for under 5's, and sometimes not at all

Being single is no problem. I am a single mum to three adopted children, adopted seperately over 11 years (who were 10, 8 and 23 months when placed). There are many children who would do best with a single mum rather than two parents (my oldest two for instance).

SS will be looking for someone with a good support network, and who can afford to take at least 6 months off work. Lots of adopted children do have issues so all adoptive parents need to think about what will happen if their child has issues which prevent the parents going back to work full time. More of an issue for singlies than couples usually. I worked full time before adopting, but had to give up work because my children had too many issues for me to work. Now I can work part time, which suits us best (and I really need the money!!)

The crucial thing to have whatever your background is a very strong motivation to become a parent, and an understanding of what adoption is about these days (parenting traumatised children with the long term effects of abuse/negelct/drug abuse and generations of dysfunction). I have known many different people adopt with very very different families and backgrounds. For me, it't the best (and most challenging) decision I have ever made!

What's bringing you to think about adoption? Are you considering other methods of becoming a parent, such as DI?

Excuse my ignorance but I have no idea what DI is

sorry, it's Donor Insemination
:)

Don't have any single male friends to ask and don't think I could afford to get it from a bank... It's very expensive isn't it?!

Im not sure if its just our authority but we dont consider people until a year after any ivf or other assisted conception has been explored.
Its also good to have some childcare experience.

Why dont you make an enquiry,there is a big recruitment drive at the moment and the adoption tema will talk you through the criteria on the phone.
Good luck.

I did find my attempt at DI a stretch on my finances (over a year ago now) yes. I ask because it's important to consider other methods of becoming a parent, and then come to the decision that adoption (or another route) is the best thing for you. SS will ask about it, and why you choose adoption over other routes. But although DI was quite expensive, it is very very different to adoption. I chose to try that route because I felt ready for a fourth child but not to adopt a fourth child at the time...adoption is very different to having a birth child. Not at all inferior, but an entirely different experience. Ultimately, it didn't work out, and I chose to not try again and stick with my three for now...see what the future brings (I'm getting a grandchild soon so the family is still expanding!)

Oh dear.... If my LA does that, they wouldn't consider me as its not that I can't have children, more the fact I have no-on to have children with! Plus, I have seen myself adopting ever since I was about 14, has always just been something in the pipeline iyswim!

Are there other ways/agencies apart from the LA?

where do you live? if you are in london you can try Corum.

I'm in central Bedfordshire :)

Berry thats fine too. You dont have to be infertile to adopt.You will need to demonstrate that you have thought it through carefuly though but they will talk you through that at your initial visit

You definitely don't have to be infertile! I was fully able to have a child when I first went for adoption...you just have to be able to justify why adoption is the best route for you to take. There are lots of reasons why that might be, in fact I doubt that the vast majority of single adopters are infertile. I expect far more fertile singles adopt than do fertile couples.

You would be looking at either your LA, a neighbouring LA or any voluntary agencies in your area (eg. Barnados, Coram). Have a search online if you want to know what all your options are. You could phone your LA, neighbouring LA's and the VA's to talk with and ask questions of each of them and see which you prefer. Your choice may also depend on what kind of child you could look after - A voluntary agency is more likely to only take on parents for older children, SN children and sibling groups, as VA's tend to place those children the LA's cannot place quickly, which usually means an additional need of some kind. However, speaking with all of them directly would give you the best knowledge to make that choice

:)

ps. There will probably be a guide to adoption on all agency websites, whether LA or VA, which will go into more depth about who they are looking for, and what the process is like for that particular agency

Thank you :)

Our local authority run adoption information evenings once a month... I often go along and speak at them, as an adopter.
They are a good way to learn more about adoption and to disperse all the myths surrounding adoption.
There are social workers to talk to.
It may be worth contacting your local authority to see if they run something similar.
Good luck in whatever you decide.