Trying for a baby - DP is adopted

[MissyNatalie]

My DP and I are about to begin ttc, changing our diets etc. I have spoken to family about any genetic diseaes floating around in my genes and (thankfully) have none that I am aware of.
However, my DP is adopted and in no contact with his birth parents. Should I be worried that there might be something terrible that he doesn't know about? His mother doesn't know anything about the birth parents and I think the family would prefer not to, which I am respecting and not forcing.

Many people don't know any fiurther back than their own parents medical details and sometimes not even then. Many people whose paretns died young won't have any idea if they would have developed a hereditary disease had they lived longer.

And of course when I was a younger woman (old gimmer emoticon) very very few illnesses were known to be genetic.

What exactly are you suggesting? That you shouldn;t ttc if you don;t have the details of your DH's genetic make-up?

My DP is adopted and knows very little about either of his birth parents. We have two DSs. I thought about it when I was pregnant with DS1, vaguely but there was no way that I was going to coerce DH into opening the SS files on the offchance that they might contain something. If your DH was born in the 60's or 70's then the same level of detail was not gathered about the birth family as it is now.

I tread carefully around DH's adoption. It is his choice as to how much information he seeks out, not mine.

I wasn't adopted but my father was. I have bugger all knowledge about his genetic make up and therefore half of mine. There is very little point worrying about it.

I was adopted in the 60s so had no medical information. When I was pregnant with DC1 we were offered genetic testing for genetic disorders found in DH and my ethinic groups. Luckily nothing was found that would cause a problem. You could ask your GP for such testing to put your mind at rest.

My DH & his brother are adopted.

I certainly wouldn't put pressure on DH and BiL to find out about their birth family. The potential benefits are outweighed by the risks, and it is 100% a decision they would have to make themselves.

You can't just put stuff like that back in the box. When I was pregnant my DH wanted to focus on our family.

When my mum was pregnant with me she found out that two of my dad's cousins had a rare chromosomal condition and she worried about it all the way through - despite being assured the chances of her children having it were thousands and thousands to one against. That would be the most likely info you would find out - a slightly increased risk of something scary, rather than a massively increased risk of something that could be screened for. Why open the can of worms anyway?

Even if your dh did access his social services /adoption agency file there is very little chnace that there will be any medical information in it. His birth mothervwas probably young -how much interest did YOU have in your familys medical hiztory when you were 20? And the medical history of your boyfriend at the time?

The only way for you dh to get relaible information would be to meet both his birth parents and get thme to aggree to give access to their medical files. Which is not going to happen.

So im sorry, you just have to live with the uncertainty

Remember that many people who grew up in their birth familes also know very little medical history. And many do not even have the correct information about who their bio parenst /grandparenst actually are, IYSWIM. Or, for example, soemone might have died v youjng so they have little info. So it might not have been very different ( from a medical history point of view) even if he wasnt adopted

HTH