I can give you a few examples of what adopters I know have experienced, but the main thing I want to say is that as your son is timid and sensitive, don’t do it to him.
Maybe consider fostering when he is older and can have a lock on his room.
Here are a few events I know to be facts.
Most details of child’s life were withheld from adoptive parents until a judge ordered otherwise post-adoption.
Foster carer was told by SS not to disclose the child’s violent behaviour to her, when she met the adopters.
Ss told the adopters that they wanted to rush the adoption through as the fosterer was becoming too attached to the child.
This fosterer later told the adoptive parents she could not wait to pass the child on and wouldn’t ever foster again because of him.
Child behaved surprisingly well for 6 weeks or so, then changed overnight. After this first few weeks, the child was violent-spitting, kicking, hitting, pinching on a daily basis. (Fine at school)
Child persistently and perpetually hitting and kicking the adoptive mothers breasts. Could not be stopped. She had massive bruising and abscesses which developed into cancer.
Child repeatedly saying they wanted to kill the adoptive mother.
Child ‘breaks all my things ’ is exactly what an older sibling of an adoptee told me.
Child attempts to hurt family pets so they have to be kept apart.
Family support falls away as people cannot cope with the behaviour.
Child at secondary age makes threats of false accusations as a means of getting his own way.
Child verbally abuses parent non-stop in a monologue as background to everyday life.
Family members are all afraid of the child as they reach their teens.
Child still wets and soils by choice, at secondary age.
Child sees the appointed therapist but the therapist, who would not allow the adoptive parents into the room, sobs when back in the waiting room, while the child laughs at her.
I’m sorry but there is no way of knowing how any child will behave. No guarantees.