Senior Management Relationship

[Morcheeba]

I have name changed because this is potentially outing.

One of our professors has just stepped into the role of HoD. She is in a personal relationship with our DoR.

I feel very uncomfortable about the situation, especially because our SMT is quite small.

I am struggling to articulate why I feel so uncomfortable about the situation but perhaps it is because of the potential for having a third of the SMT (SMT is six people) acting as one voice or unit.

There is nothing in our policies to bar personal relationships between colleagues as long as steps are taken to ensure there is no direct line management or conflicts of interest. I assume the HoD and DoR have ticked these boxes.

How do other people feel about this? Am I being ridiculous?

I am sorry if there is no point or question to this post. I do not fully understand the politics of my department (ie who is friends with who, who is a gossip etc.) and I am not close enough with anyone in my department to have this conversation with.

I’m sorry but you are being over-sensitive. I’ve been in almost the same situation with respect to two colleagues. It happens and you should expect that they will behave professionally. Who is anyone else to question a colleague’s personal relationships except if they’re with a student?

it’s a feature of academia that the potential pool of partners is fairly narrow, particularly for academic women (most men find clever high achieving women a threat romantically). And as academics often move around to get an actual job they are more inclined to pair up at the institution they end up at, especially in a smallish university city.

As long as they’re above board and open and don’t let personal stuff interfere with their leadership roles you need to get on with your job.

And don’t assume they’re a Borg each thinking the same! In my experience of working with couples that’s not always a given!

I can understand why this feels uncomfortable. Small depts are cliquey enough and having two members of SMT in a relationship does add an extra layer of complexity. As you say, they’ll have been made aware that they have to be cautious about conflicts of interest, so this may make for very carefully considered decisions on their part, which could turn out to be a plus! Nothing you can do but watch and wait, be mindful of the potential for difficulties whilst being careful not to over-interpret entirely innocent decisions or remarks.

I assume that they can each recuse themselves from decisions involving the other? So HoD should not line-manager her partner or do his annual appraisals, and DoR should not evaluate internal grant applications from his partner etc.

if they can manage this and make everything clear and transparent, then it should be OK. I assume both are very aware of the potential conflicts-of-interest and perceived conflicts, and will be careful to avoid them.

Thank you for the responses posted here. I am aware that I am being unreasonable according to policies, but I am struggling to shake my unease with the situation.

At a previous university where I worked, there was also a married couple in my department. He was HoD and when she took on DoE, he stepped down from HoD position saying that he wanted everyone, both in the department and in the university more generally, to have full confidence in SMT which they couldn't have if there was a married couple on it. I think this was the right thing to do.

@gavisconismyfriend This resonates. My department is very cliquey. The two people in question are part of a research cluster which is particularly cliquey and has actively and implicitly excluded people outside of this group. Their relationship feels like its taking that clique to a whole new level.

It seems to me that the problem is not that there is a couple in the department but that there are cliques. That is a different problem ( if it is a problem).

I agree with this. Cliques are a big and entirely separate problem. Could the rightful source of your discomfort be with the clique, OP?

Before coming to the UK I worked for 15 years in a highly ranked American university. It was recognised that the discomfort mentioned by the OP often worked against women (I realise the OP isn’t being sexist). The university made a policy prohibiting objections to the participation of couples on a committee. At the same time it was made clear that the duty of confidentiality each had towards various stakeholders could not be compromised by the relationship. I thought this was the right approach.

I don’t think I would inherently be bothered by having a couple on the SMT. As a PP said and as my own marriage exemplifies, academics are quite independent minded. I would mind, though, if one of them seemed to constantly echo the other