Awful awful presentation

[Southlondoner88]

what can I do about my awful presentation skills. I had a presentation today in front of about 25 people in my cohort and although I felt ok about it and was trying my best to be calm, once I started I completely crumbled. Before I knew it my voice sounded so shaky, I sounded out of breath and couldn’t get my words out naturally. This of course made me worse because now others were aware of my shakiness and then ended up shaking, pausing, telling them I was nervous, taking breaks to sip water. I was just a mess and I’m so embarrassed. I’m much older than most of my cohort and everyone, although probably nervous too, just seemed so calm and controlled, there wasn’t one person who sounded or looked shaky. Why does it have to happen to me? How can I stop these physical symptoms that seem to come out if nowhere.

Most presentations lately have been online but today’s was face to face and I thought I’d be ok because my online ones have been fine.

just feel so crap now after that and trying not ruminate but it’s hard, my job when qualified will consist of leadership/ public speaking in some way and I just worry what people make of someone who can’t string a sentence together.

Bump, anyone?

I so sympathise. Same thing happened to me a few months ago. First in person presentation since covid and I completely fell apart, shaking, voice wavering. I vividly remember thinking about running out of the room at one point. I didn't pull it together and it was pretty much a disaster.

I was mortified for a good few days afterwards, cringing whenever I thought about it. I said nothing to anyone, made no excuses and let it fade from people's minds.

It was a good reminder in some ways that my skills were getting rusty. I've made a concerted effort to do a few in person presentations since and all has been fine. One small thing is that I realise that I am much more comfortable sitting, or with a lectern in front of me. I really don't like just standing there in front of people!

Anyway, many of us have been there. The embarrassment will pass!

Did the audience find what you said interesting? Did you get good questions? Did anyone talk to you about it after?

I love presenting, I'm not great at it, my slides are simple and I'm not close to slick or well rehearsed, but I know my stuff, so as long as I get decent engagement and questions, and usually at least one, often more, people come up afterwards to chat, I'm happy I've done a good enough job.

Oh I feel your pain. Deep breaths before starting. Pick a point in the room you can use to regain calm. Ask for feedback from others, it might not have been as bad as you think. Remember they don’t know what you mean to say so if you go off script it is ok!

Have you tried learning your presentation from a script and repeating it until it's word perfect and you can effectively perform it? That really helps me as I know exactly what I'm going to say and do throughout.

Ahh OP I've been there. Not academia but same response in front of a lot of colleagues in a job where I need to communicate clearly. Made me feel deep shame and embarrassment.

What helped - practice practice practice! Getting used to my own voice, knowing the content inside out so the words came out automatically and I could concentrate on natural delivery. And pretending I was a confident presenter - so moving around a bit, taking my time. I got better bit by bit, my confidence grew, and at some point I just stopped faking.

I'll never be a natural and still always prep, but it's good enough.

Public speaking is a learned skill for most and you can absolutely get better at it :)

Look up Toastmasters

Practice in front of people and give presentations as much as you can. Also there are online or in person courses on presentation skills. There's an organisation called Toastmasters which helps develop presentation skills. The main thing is to keep doing it until you get so used to it it becomes second nature.

I was terrified of presenting for years for the same reason. The moment I stood up I would get out of breath and then everybody could hear my voice shaking and me gasping for breath and it was so awkward.

Then I did a course on presentation skills. They made us present and filmed it and we had to watch it back. I wanted to run away.

But... on camera I saw none of it. My voice wasn't shaking. I didn't sound out of breath at all. I looked fine. I bet it'd be the same for you.

I still don't enjoy presenting but I know the awfulness is in my head, and now it's so much easier.

Thanks for your replies

@LordSnot where did you do the presentation course, would toastmasters be similar?

I think what was worse was that a few people in my cohort came up to me afterwards, holding me on the arm and saying things like ‘well done for sticking with it and not giving up’ so basically they were being nice but I take it as pitying me. I just wish it wasn’t that obvious that I was struggling but it clearly was, made worse by the fact I paused and said I needed water and then paused again saying ‘I feel nervous, sorry.’Oh lord, the shame. I remember reading somewhere that pausing and drinking water makes you look more relaxed and also saying you’re nervous makes you calm down but I think I missed the mark there somewhere.

sorry to hear there are plenty others who have this experience. Why is it so difficult for some? How can people in their early twenties be so eloquent and there’s me, older and should be wiser but can’t function with some pressure. Think I will do toastmasters, I do need to get used to my shakiness and be on with that, I think what’s happening now is I’m trying to hide it which makes it worse.

It was a training course a previous employer used. About 15 years ago so I'm afraid I remember nothing about the trainer or which company it might have been. I've never tried Toastmasters but I would say the only useful part of the course for me was watching myself on tape, and I don't think TM does that.

I take a beta blocker an hour before every talk. It’s like a magic bullet

ask your Gp for a few for situational anxiety

Have you watched Amy Cuddy ted talk ? Might be really helpful. If you like it she's written a book too.