How to cope with working notice period

[Helloits2023]

I’m a junior academic and I’ve just quit to take a job in a think tank. Mostly because of not wanting to work in academia anymore (job insecurity, expectations of unpaid labour, don’t love teaching). My line manager is great but some of the other people I work with on my research project can be a bit crap/toxic.

I gave my three months’ notice earlier this week and already it’s been tough. Repeated requests/pressure to commit to work after I leave, with the implication that I owe them. Really laying on thick how inconvenient it is I’m leaving mid project. Being told to make sure I don’t slack off. The PI said he felt sorry for me leaving when we were just about to get interesting results.

It’s so insulting because I’ve been nothing but dedicated and professional, have been way more productive than anyone else on the project, and with little support. Has anyone been on either side of this before and have any advice on how to cope? Their approach is already having a really demotivating effect, I started off wanting to leave the project in the very best state I can (I have pride in my work! I don’t want to burn bridges!) but now just thinking “fuck the lot of you”.

Just keep telling yourself, in 3 months, none of them will matter at all and you won't have to listen to their opinions.

Also that from now until you leave they can't fire you, they can only 'let you go' early.

So head down, focus on your work and ignore the comments. Good luck with the new job.

You need to get a mantra and keep repeating it to yourself. It'll help you formulate how to respond to ridiculous comments by keeping you in a mindset.

"Not my problem" is a good one.

Equally, a stock response is also good. "Okay" followed by silence is useful. You don't need to explain or apologise or over-compensate for the timing of your leaving.

You have your leave date, just work Mon-Fri, 9-5 until then. What gets done, gets done, what doesn't, doesn't.

Or, you could just try a sickie for the last few weeks of your notice period 😛

Huge congratulations on your new job!

They are probably trying to guilt trip because you have been a good, solid reliable worker.
There is never a good time to leave as far as an employer is concerned so you have to do what’s best for you.
You are on a count down now so just remember how many more days you have left and how much closer you are to the next chapter of your life.

I wouldn’t be be doing extra work etc or making myself available after hours for them.
You are leaving for a reason and it’s all the things you mention.
Good luck.

Close down any talk of you being available after you leave - it is not going to be possible. You will be busy learning your new job and you won't have the head space. Don't allow them to build up unreasonable expectations. "Sorry, but I'm concerned that there could be a conflict of interest. I won't be able to have any input after xx date."

They are reacting bizarrely because you have confounded expectations and are stepping outside 'the system'. So they are trying to wield the power that remains to them.

I've just completed a long notice period in a similar field. (Though, in my case, several colleagues quietly congratulated me on escaping the toxic environment.)

Two mantras , one internal one external:

In my head I said "This won't be my problem in X weeks' time."

When asked to do anything after I left, my response was "Sorry, that won't be possible." No explanations.

Plus smile and nod, smile and nod.

Thanks everyone. I like the internal mantra “not my problem” combined with stock responses “ok” or “sorry not possible”. Lots of my colleagues are happy for me but yes these senior guys (and it is men!) don’t understand why anyone would leave and seem to take it as an affront.

Fabulous, OP. But don't say "Sorry, not possible".

Just say "Not possible". There's absolutely no need to apologise.

If you do feel you need to be a little bit apologetic, you could always say "I understand its inconvenient for you but it's not possible".

Thanks, it’s useful to have language like that for when I feel like I have to apologise but really shouldn’t!!

I think it depends how you say the "sorry". Not nervously, or even apologetically. A calm, firm "Sorry, not possible" is assertive and sets boundaries, while still meeting politeness norms.

The OP still has to work with pushy, possibly resentful colleagues. Including "sorry" might make it easier for them to accept her boundaries, whereas a blunt "Not possible" could get their backs up even further, making her notice period even more unpleasant.

You certainly don't have to apologise. This "sorry" is not a genuine apology! It's just a social idiom.

Your HR team will likely be on top of this already OP but a few people on temporary contracts recently left my team (I am HoD) and I was quite struck at how little annual leave people take, this had to be spent before the contract expired and in most cases the last effective date was much earlier than the last real date. So with that in mind can you use any outstanding annual leave you have strategically? If you can slot in a cheeky WFH day here and there too, you might be able to spend the last months of the project semi-detached from the tensions.

I'm back for some more moral support please. Every single time I have met with the PI since giving my notice he has:

• not read either of the drafts I need his feedback on, and so delayed progress on me actually finishing up my work
• referred to a "gentleman's agreement" of how I was allowed to finish up work on my previous project while working for him, and so I can finish up work on this project after I leave

I've already said I can only do very limited work (e.g. responding to reviewers' comments on already submitted papers) after I've left, and so we should be working off the assumption that I need to finish anything he expects from me by my leaving date. He just doesn't want to know.

WTF do I do? Obviously once I've left I can just ignore his emails, but he won't listen to me when I'm telling him that I need his input to get stuff done now (we still have 10 weeks left of my time, I can achieve it!) and he can't just keep putting it off.

When you say that you need his input, is that for manuscript drafting so you can get them into review before you leave?

When you say you need his input to 'get stuff done now' - what is the 'stuff'? Is it 'stuff' that you'll need in your new career?

@KStockHERO The stuff is the manuscript drafting. Will I need it (as in a couple more first author papers) in my next career? Probably not, depends on my next few career moves. The new job is still very research adjacent (will publish but much less), and it could be that I continue doing research-y type work after that too, and so a good recent publication record would be useful. But nice to have rather than essential. So I do want to get the papers out, but in the end much much worse for him than me if they’re not done.

academia is v bad for always having one job bleed into the next. you spend postdoc1 writing up papers from your PhD, then postdoc 2 writing papers from postdoc 1 etc. it all works as long as people stay within the system, and then it falls apart when they leave.

can you push the line that your new job is going to be very intense with deadline / travel / conferences / whatever so you really won't have time to work on the papers. and remind the PI that he will need to write the papers after you've gone.

but if the papers end up not submitted, it is the PIs problem in the end. As PI, I've often had to write up papers from students/postdocs who have left the lab because I want to see the work published.

Okay, makes sense.

I think you should be absolutely explicitly clear in an email about the things you’re willing and unwilling to work on once you’ve left your current job. I know you’ve already done this but I think being crystal clear and doing it via email will leave no room for doubt around expectations.

Fuck the shit about a gentleman’s agreement. But if you say you’re willing to do some things after you’ve left – R&R, discussions about figures or whatever – you’re at least showing some willingness to stick with the agreement. As PP said, boundaries between different projects blur but you need to set your limits to how much blurring you’re willing to take.

Then I think you have two options:

1. Keep politely asking to meet and talk about manuscript drafts, knowing he likely won’t do this. Then, when you leave, send him the unfinished/unedited drafts in their current state making clear that you’ll do no more work on them because (a) you’ve repeatedly asked for meetings to get them finished which he’s refused, and (b) you were clear in a previous email (the one I’ve suggested above) that you wouldn’t work on manuscript preparation after your leave date.

1. Work to make the manuscripts as good as they can be now. Then email him and tell him that you’ll be submitting them on a specific date before your leave date with or without his input.

Both of these put the ball in his court – the first makes the manuscripts his problem after you leave, and the second makes them his problem now. It’s good that these papers aren’t essential for your new role. But presumably he’ll want the papers out for his career, so at some point he will have to deal with them. Meh, leave that for him to decide.

How do you get on otherwise?

referred to a "gentleman's agreement" of how I was allowed to finish up work on my previous project while working for him, and so I can finish up work on this project after I leave

Surely that's not up to you? If you were allowed to finish up work on my previous project while working for him, that's because he generously allowed you to do so. You cannot speak for staff senior to you in your next role. It is not a promise you can make.

Send to me that all your conversations with him need to be in writing ie by email , and you need to cc his senior in every email to him.

Seems to me that all your conversations with him need to be in writing ie by email...

You don't need to send them to me 😄

When they stop paying you, you stop working for them. Once you’re out of academia this will seem far more normal than it appears to do in a university (well the one I work in anyway).

I strongly agree with a clear email setting out what you can reasonably do in the next 10 weeks and what you require from Prof Tosser, by when, to be able to do so. Do not agree (and especially do not offer) to do reviewing/reading/anything at all beyond that point. Because by then someone else will be paying you to do a different job, and it will be new and possibly a bit tiring as well as exciting and interesting, and tedious hectoring emails from someone for whom you no longer work will be an unwelcome distraction from the legitimate joy of having got out of a bad situation.

And then just do what you’ve said you can do, or don’t if Prof T fails to deliver on his side, repeating your internal and external mantras the while. if you are feeling kind toward your (unfortunate, apparently) successor, write a decent handover. But that’s it. Well done, and good luck!

You won’t have access to your university email account after your departure so any further work will surely be impossible…

Do not agree to anything whatsoever. This will all recede over the rear horizon as soon as you leave.

I don't think it's very realistic to say you'll do nothing from your current job once you're in the new role.

Academic work has long tentacle so things related to your current role will bleed into the time you're in the new post.

If you've done enough to ensure you've secured an authorship ( it seems like you have ), then you could just drop it all and go no-contact bit I thinks its likely the PI will want to discuss some stuff with you. As I said, it's up to your how accommodating you are with that and where you set those boundaries - for example, will you do the R&R yourself or just make yourself available for an hour or two to discuss things so he can do the R&R?

Is someone taking over your post? If so, as PP suggested, do a very good handover and don't make yourself available for any kind of training or mentoring of the new person after you've left. If there is a new person carrying on your work, sort out with the PI and confirm by email how future authorship will work

Hi everyone, just coming back to say thank you for the moral support. It was my last day yesterday and I’m so relieved and happy. Remains to be seen whether they’ll be hectoring me for stuff: I’ve said I’m submitting the papers in a week (with someone else as corresponding author), not promised any further work on them, I’m hoping strict data protection stuff means I won’t be able to anyway.