Overwhelmed by other academic's achievements

[ungleimpact]

Does anyone else feel like this in academia? I am a very very average academic, some small successes, but lots and lots of failures. Very slow moving career. It would be OK in a way, if I could just enjoy the process rather than the outcomes. I try to do that anyway. But I sometimes just feel overwhelmed by the achievements of other academics. It seems that everywhere I look I see other academics listing their papers published, awards won, fellowships given, etc etc. If I dare to look on Twitter, I see more announcements of the same, along with academics confidently pronouncing their opinions, etc etc. I don't feel confident about very much - in fact, the older I get, the less I think I know about anything. And I just can't get myself into this culture of self-promotion (not least because I'm not sure I have that much to promote)! I'm not sure what I'm looking for here but ... I don't know. Does anyone else ever feel the same? Sometimes I wonder if I'm just in the wrong job.

I have had a lot of success recently but I still feel like this - a hangover I think of going slooooowly for the first ten years of my career (Mat leaves and part time and so on)

I hate the competitive side of my character and try to squash it but it does appear when I see 32 year olds being made full professor

i also cannot understand the CONFIDENCE in one’s own opinions. I have a PhD in respiratory viruses and didn’t dare post once about covid on twitter in case I was wrong. Many many of my colleagues were merrily posting away - stuff that did later turn out not to be correct. I don’t understand how. I’d be a nervous wreck

Yes I can relate to this OP. I started my academic career with rapid success (but prior to social media) then have been along the typical female route: loads of teaching, programme leadership, maternity leaves……
I’ve never liked self promotion, find it really difficult. But I am at the point now (youngest child starting school soon) where I feel like I really need to get back on it. I’ve joined Twitter to have a nosey and have found this really interesting and insightful (a lot of how Not to do it…). Have also started connecting with people on LinkedIn, although not sure if that’s already had it’s heyday?
I’ve also started to talk to people in my institution about ideas I’ve been sitting on for ages and they’ve been really well received which is encouraging. Telling myself to Just Ask has been a great motto.
Things specifically that have helped me are mentoring (so valuable) and teaming up with a colleague: feels much better to think about submitting bids, conferences etc with an ally.
It’s a pretty tough world to be in a lot of the time. I get massive satisfaction and reward from teaching so that helps a lot when I don’t feel like I’m getting anywhere with all the ‘other’ stuff.

Hi both, Thanks for responding. I guess this must be fairly common in our sector (and lots of others too). Congratulations @bigkidsdidit - that sounds great. What do you think changed for you to start generating those successes? And good luck @AlwaysColdHands with getting things going - my kids are both in secondary school now so I don't have the excuse of having young ones (excuse seems the wrong word there but hopefully you know what I mean). I have landed a new contract with a few years with very limited teaching. I am really hoping this could be the moment I get things moving but I also want to be realistic given my past track record!

Hard relate on all fronts. I have had a couple of side steps in terms of career progression but constantly feel like I am not doing enought to move myself forward/ am far behind where I should be/ not living up to my on paper potential.
My biggest problem at the moment though is that I am just shattered. I have zero motivation to complete the mile long to do list and am in grave danger of torpedoing the opportunties I have previously worked really hard to carve out. I know I need a break, and a long one at that- but there is so much to do Idoln't feel I can. Feel rather lsot and helpless

I am a very very average academic, some small successes, but lots and lots of failures. Very slow moving career.

TBH this is a fairly typical career trajectory. The high flyers get a lot of attention so people assume that this is the norm but it really isn't.

Yep, I was thinking this the other day. I'm a very average academic but academia is such a hard place to be right now that I'm happy with this. I like to think I'm collegiate rather than ambitiously self promoting!

Are you asking for what you need in order to achieve success? Are you getting the sabbaticals you need to be able to write papers and apply for/take up fellowships? Are you ringfencing your research hours? Is there a PhD candidate who could help with research on a paper for you? (Lots of that about!) Can you team up with a colleague who has a related but not identical specialism and co-write a paper?

There are public academic essay awards that get low submission rates. Try knocking something out in a short fixed time frame, enter and see what happens.

Thanks again so much for your responses everybody. It's great to know I'm not alone - and the reminder too that most people are not high fliers. I think one other thing I would say about my career is that it's ... erratic?! Like there are some things I seem to do alright. I had an impact case study in the recent REF which was thought probably to be 4* (strange system where you never quite know). I have a book coming out this year which seems to be generating some traction (and media coverage - cause or effect of my impact work, I get more of that I think than some academics who are much more successful than me). But in terms of quantity, my publication record overall is woeful, I have never held a large grant, I have no esteem factors in terms of journal editorship etc. And I am amazingly badly networked and nobody seems to want to work/write with me! At the moment, I often feel amazingly lonely but also quite exposed, hence coming here for people to talk to. So ... maybe this is normal. But the trouble is I feel identified with this career - so I have no idea what else I could do or would want to do. Anyway, again, thanks for listening to my self-indulgent meanders ....

What changed for me was - I spent a year giving as many talks as possible. I emailed people who I knew ran seminar lists at their universities, said on twitter I was happy to give talks, basically shamelessly got my name out there. Over 15 months I probably gave 20 talks. I really spread the word about my research and talked to tons of people about it

this did 2 things: people know me now! Do not underestimate this when they receive your grant or paper to review; and also I got LOADS of input on my plans and really honed my experimental plans and study design, so my work is now better

It was a lot of work, don’t get me wrong. I basically made small talk for a year. My face used to hurt form smiling 😁 but it really paid off. Before I went anywhere I’d research everyone I was meeting and ask good questions on their research and where we overlapped. I put a lot of effort into it. I think it is paying off now

this is very common

have you read the manifesto for slow science - faster work is not always better.
www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1364661319302426?casa_token=p47w0cxCSgcAAAAA:qFuP8du5WB8qq0wAe9IN2-8CYg2pUaQ8LlzAZ0XJTjSnuFRRU3fhX3eLdx_SqmzpwPTdUl6G9g

if you do want to get out there and boost your profile, contacting people is a good idea. you can email journals and ask to be considered for the editorial board (I'm an Editor-in-Chief and like getting emails like that). And you can apply for funding to organise a small conference or workshop which is good to (a) have a grant on your CV (b) make sure people have heard of your name and (c) get everyone else to travel to you.

I resonate completely with this too! No wise words buy I feel like this a lot. Solidarity bump.

Thanks again everybody for responding and emphathising. Weirdly on the profile thing, my profile is probably very slightly higher than my publication record should allow - partly because I have a relatively high profile in terms of impact, I think. I just want and need to publish more! Maybe a few years of limited teaching will make that more possible .... watch this (literal in terms of journal outputs!) space, I guess.