Academic contact keeps asking for money

[VictorianGothic]

A while ago a scholar who I don't know personally but I had read their work with interest (pretty big in Victorian lit, former Head of Dept etc) friended me on facebook - it was a bit surprising but I do use it a lot for networking and I could see he knew lots of friends of friends. Then he sent me several messages about how life has taken a difficult turn for him since he retired, and now he regularly asks me for money, with heart-rending stories each time. I can see other academic friends are sending him money on his fund raising platform. I feel really bad for him, but he's asking me so often. I am beginning to think he must have some sort of addiction. Has anyone encountered anything like this?

Could it be a gambling addiction?
No idea who you're talking about but repeatedly and brazenly asking virtual strangers for funds smacks of the desperate state people can get in with gambling.

maybe he has cognitive impairments/ dementia/ mental illness.
either way just ignore, block.

Do you know him well enough to contact him off Facebook? Or anyone who does? Although you're saying it's not a cloned account I wonder if you can be 100% sure without speaking to him offline? He may be mortified to find out this has been going on in his name. Or, you might get a sense of what's really behind his requests? Either way, it doesn't seem like sending money is the answer.

If he is asking lots of people you have no need to worry if you are offending him personally by ignoring him. It's very odd and I really don't think you should engage with him.

I was wondering about a stroke or onset dementia that has changed his personality. You can lose your inhibitions, which is why he feels OK asking loads of people for money.

Are all requests coming on the same platform? Do you know anyone who has actually spoken to the person in real life to confirm it is him?

Could be cloned, could be hacked, could be an assistant managing social media doing it without his knowledge.

Definitely doesn't sound like a cloned account - I think this would be difficult to sustain for two years; him or his family would surely have realized by now that someone else was using his name.

I do not know the person you are referring to op but I do have a similar story. I won’t out the person ever but a very well known and highly respected person I know did this same sort of thing. He’s been on tv, lots of media, Ted Talks the lot. He started asking clients he had worked with in the past for money. And lots of it. He was using crack cocaine. He went to rehab last year. I would say drugs are the most likely issue with your man too.

HI @MargaretOliphant and @PersephoneInTheGarden I knew there would be some Victorianists on here... fab usernames. That kind of makes me feel a bit better, that it's nothing personal but that lots of us have been asked & refused. He's clearly still getting a lot of responses though. I am sure it's genuinely him and whatever is going on, it is really sad to think of someone whose life has come to this.

Just block him.
Also I would be concerned it may be a scam. Somone regularly impercentates the head of our school asking for money. We get almost weekly emails from his secretary reminding us that prof x will never contact you via a private email. That he would never ask for money ect.
Are you sure this person is who he claims he is. I would email his academic email and ask for clarification.

Yes, maybe something like that @MayorDusty - I was thinking more along the lines of @Loginmystery . Your experience makes a lot of sense. Got to be something which would override everything else and run through an (old style) USS pension too. @LemonDrizzleSlice maybe - but he seems perfectly capable of managing quite a sophisticated money gathering operation. Doesn't stop me feeling very sorry for him even if it's clear money's not the answer. Anyway, many thanks everyone for talking it through with me. I felt so unsettled by it and sorry for him but it has made me realise I can't do anything to help except disengage.

I'm a 19C academic - I remember vaguely hearing about this, but also that while people were sorry for him, it was a sad situation but not one anyone could do much about. The reference is now tantalising me and chasing it up is far more interesting than the reports I'm writing at the moment

I have a fiend who worked as a freelancer in a highly paid industry, but developed a neurological condition which meant he couldn't continue. He also had a vocation/hobby where all his money went - it was charity work, not a hobby hobby, but he paid for a lot of the help the charity gave from his own pocket. There were various rounds of fund-raising for him, but after a while we all had to get together and had the hard conversation about insisting that he either moved back to his mother, or he got proper benefits and other social security stuff. We couldn't keep on funding him, or his rescue work.

It's really tough, having to say No to someone in that situation.

'friend' not 'fiend'

@ExMachinaDeus sorry to hear about your friend, that sounds such a sad situation too.
Yes, it's so clear the situation is unsustainable here but it doesn't stop you feeling very sad for them.
Thanks again for the replies which have helped me think things through.

I think you should be talking to other people about this. It sounds as though he has a few people at the very least who are sending him money. I'm really surprised you sent him anything when you don't actually know him.