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Original poster

Exam gems

11 replies

ghislaine · 20/05/2019 17:21

Thought I'd share this one with you - in my exam, I set a question which referred to an academic going on research leave. This is what came back to me:

Exam: Dr X is on research leave
Student: Dr X is on holiday.

OP posts:
milkjetmum · 20/05/2019 18:20

I had a 3rd year biology student write earnestly about the 2nd stomach humans have in an exam q after I mentioned 'dessert stomach ' phenomenon in a lecture on appetite...

Hefzi · 20/05/2019 18:25

I love exam marking for this reason GrinGrin

But OP, students firmly believe that we are on holiday whenever they are, whether it's in an exam or not - see also "on sabbatical"!

GCAcademic · 20/05/2019 19:19

My mother still thinks I’m on holiday whenever it’s not term time. I tried explaining it to her for fifteen years, but now I’ve just given up.

Hefzi · 20/05/2019 19:28

GC that reminds me of the meme from a few years ago with the different pictures: what I think I do, what my students think, what my mum thinks I do...

images.app.goo.gl/gjPiTyv5Kht3pKXcA

Mine refers to overseas conferences, meetings and fieldwork as "holidays" AngryGrin they mostly aren't

QueenRefusenik · 23/05/2019 20:00

Two separate students, asked about mitochondrial DNA, correctly stated it was passed down from mother to daughter... And then went on to add that was because it was on the Y chromosome. Headdesk

Another helpfully answered a different question with 'sorry I have no idea where Siberia is'.

historyrocks · 24/05/2019 15:36

I once had a student just write in their exam: "Sorry, I didn't revise. I'll see you at the re-sit." At least they spared me the pain of reading a load of rubbish.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 26/05/2019 10:00

I had a 3rd year biology student write earnestly about the 2nd stomach humans have in an exam q after I mentioned 'dessert stomach ' phenomenon in a lecture on appetite...

If men can have penises why can't I have a dessert stomach?

YetAnotherSpartacus · 26/05/2019 10:01

Sorry - I meant if women can have penises.

DirtyDennis · 28/05/2019 11:36

@historyrocks

A few years ago, I had a student in an exam write "I'm really sorry, I didn't revise for this at all. In fact, I have been a really bad student this year...." and went on for pages and pages (must have taken the whole two hours) about how they'd prioritised their social life, they'd been in an intense/weird relationship which had taken up lots of head-space, and had underestimated how much independent study university would entail.

They then went into a long analysis of their fee situation saying that they were being ridiculous because they were paying so much money but, on the other hand, they were in a weird position where they felt they were paying for a service which they weren't really receiving. This last part was actually a really good social science analysis (very critical, very reflective) but wasn't really the question.

Grin
bakedbeanzontoast · 29/05/2019 12:25

they felt they were paying for a service

This one always makes me laugh.

No the taxpayer is, and chances are you'll never pay it all back.

eddiestanleys · 29/05/2019 12:27

'Harrison Ford invented cars' seen that a few times on History gcse

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