Oh, that's rotten.

I know it isn't any comfort, but you're eligible for NHS investigations now, aren't you? Three miscarriages in a row. I'm currently being investigated (have been for nearly a year now, as they tick things off lists), and though it is grim to me it also feels much better than just sitting around wondering what could be wrong. I have a baby DD who's not biologically mine, so I am very fortunate and I know that I'm not in the same boat as you. But I do have some of the same experiences and am currently in yet another temporary job. It just plays havoc with time. And it is horrible constantly feeling you can't plan. But then, academia is like that anyway! If you did end up pregnant with no job, could you make it work? It is a truism, but as people say, there's never a 'right' time to have a baby. Plan all you like, wait for a stable job, and you could still find the world crashes down around your ears.

So sorry you're in this position, recurrent miscarriage is shit enough without the added pressure of a work deadline. I don't know what testing you've had but you could consider going partially private to prof quenby in Coventry or similar, she looks at autoimmune things which aren't in the standard NHS tests, for about £300 I think (apologies if this is out of date, my miscarriages were in 2012-2014). Also after my forth MC I was referred to St Mary's who are specialists, and were more helpful than my local hospital. I think prof quenby in particular would say that unexplained doesn't mean there isn't a fixable cause, just that the tests you've had so far haven't picked it up. There's no reason at your age not to be able to carry to term, you just need to get to the bottom of what's causing it, and need medical staff who will help you with that. Good luck

It's really tricky when pregnancy plans are bound up with job plans, isn't it. I stayed in a job longer than I probably should have done because I was planning to get pregnant but when after several years nothing had happened I gave up waiting and moved to another job. I think it was good for me to have a new job to focus on so that I had a distraction and I knew that even if I didn't get pregnant I was moving on with my life in another way rather than just treading water. But maybe that wouldn't have been the right choice for other people.

From a practical point of view, look up maternity allowance - my understanding is that if you changed jobs and weren't eligible for statutory maternity pay, you should still get maternity allowance if you have earned enough in the previous year. It is the same as SMP. I don't know if in your industry you would normally get more than SMP -if so then that is a different kettle of fish.
I wish you all the best.

That's awful, what the NHS hospital made you feel. I get so angry about this. My first GP, near Oxford, was totally uninterested and didn't care in the slightest (never said anything quite that bad though!); my new ones happen to be linked with a hospital where they do a lot of research into maternal health and so they've been much more helpful.

Sorry to have assumed you'd not been tested - I think I am just evangelical about it because GP no. 1 didn't even tell me it was an option.

But yes. Sorry, it is just shit. I wish I knew a way to make it not shit. It's one of thing things that makes me so aware that the world (and academia especially) really just doesn't get how pregnancy is for a lot of women.

I don't know if it's any help - but try not to feel guilty about being distracted. Maybe choose to do the work you like best which you often don't allow yourself to do - like side projects which feel like an indulgence.

I found it really hard on a research contract when I knew my position was too insecure for paid maternity leave and for me to count on a job to go back to, and then once I decided to take the plunge it took a long time to conceive. I got obsessed for a little while by a two-week-wait forum, and felt I was losing my mind.

It's very hard for women planning to have families and quite a few female colleagues just didn't have children. But your plan to carry on applying is a good one - you have to take risks for what is important to you. I know a few people who have begun new jobs when pregnant, and that will or may mean missing out on a nice long maternity leave, but you can perhaps negotiate some flexibility if you're offered a post. Permanent lectureships often have less teaching in the first term or year, for example. Lots more things are possible than appear to be possible in a job advert.

Careers are long but the window in which to have a family is quite narrow. You've been both sensible and brave in planning to start a family now - I wish you all the very best of luck on every front.

Hi OP, so sorry you are going through this. I tried for nearly 4 years and in that time had 3 post docs and a temp lectureship. For what it’s worth I would just say keep applying for things. If you get them, and you get pregnant- well that’s a great problem to have o solve. I really regretted every missed opportunity which I’d let pass because I might get pregnant (and didn’t).

All the very best luck

On the distraction and lack of productivity
Front / you’re probably doing much more than you realise. But if you’re really worried, take some time off as sick leave. Just take a month off, keep off the internet, and spend some time looking after yourself. You’ve had bereavement after bereavement and you need to heal from that. I had a mc just before a big fellowship deadline and I took no time off. It took me months to recover and I so wish I’d just sacked off the bloody application, done it 6 months later, and spent the time in bed crying. I’m sure in the long run I would have got more done in any case