studying working & parenting - tips!

[pepper30]

Hi everyone,
Im in my third year of a professional doctorate which means I work 9-5, I have some but little study time embedded into that. I have 2 children 5 and 10 months and am struggling with managing it all.

I guess I'm at a bit of a dip today as had hoped to get some work on my thesis done. My husband works most weekends but is off today. Anyway, ds1 having been up all night poorly I'm left shattered, so yet again chance for work is gone.

Just wondering how others did this....any tips? I'm considering staying on longer at work say until 8 for a little while until i catch up, but wont see the kids then and will probably feel quite guilty!

dh did his PhD when ours were little.
It was hard.
He worked into the evenings (as was I at the time - I was teaching) and we were both just shattered, but we just had to keep focusing on the end point and getting on with it.
We were strict about alternating the night wakings, so we each got a full night's sleep every other night. If either of us managed so we didn't have work in the evening, then we'd turn in and try to catch up a couple of hours extra sleep.

Presumably it's your employer who is sponsoring you to do the doctorate? Could you go to them and explain that you need your study hours? It doesn't seem reasonable to want you to undertake such a big commitment but then not give you the time to do it.

My friend and her dh both started PhDs at the same time, when their kiddies were aged 3 and 5. They worked all the time they could, and divided up childcare fairly. That went on for 4 years until they submitted. They hardly saw each other and are now divorced.

Could you pay for childcare during the weekends to give you that working time? This would give your dh some time off too.hth x