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Can I ask for your advice?

4 replies

Lilysfires · 03/04/2023 16:30

I've been in my job 2 and a half years, and for the most part have enjoyed it. It's flexible, good pay and my immediate team are nice. However, around a year ago one colleague took a dislike to me and I wasn't sure why. She just one day started ignoring me if I asked her a question, would ignore me on teams and would also ignore me on work nights out. I wasn't too bothered as I didn't see her loads (we work at different sites).

However, she then decided to leave the business for a new job and on her leaving day called me on teams to let me know the reason. Her reason was that when she visited our site for the day- I didn't initiate a catch up/coffee with her and she thought it was rude- that's it. I told her that I was busy that day (doing my job) and she said I could've made the time and we agreed to disagree.

She then left for a new job for eight weeks, all was good and quiet but now she is back and has returned and seems to have made it her mission to destroy me professionally. She's been telling other team members to watch out as I'm 'nasty spirited'' and that 'I encourage cliques within the business' etc- and it's got to the point now where people are mentioning to me that they've been prewarned!!

It's not true, but here is my dilemma, this woman is my managers favourite. On her leaving, he took her out for a meal to a steak restaurant (which she bragged about and no other leavers have got) and he openly vouched for her to get a job back in the business when she didn't like her new one (He told this to multiple colleagues). I've spoken to him about her and what she has been saying and he hasn't addressed it once.

I know I need to go to HR but will they do anything? It's become so bad and I feel so anxious I've started applying for other jobs and I'm cautious that my manager will need to be my reference so I don't want to upset him or his 'favourite' either by going higher up. I'm also sad that I may need to leave due to this one person.

Please, what would you do?

OP posts:
TallulahsThoughts · 03/04/2023 17:16

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Lilysfires · 03/04/2023 17:17

@MNHQ can this please be moved to chat? Posted in the wrong area!

OP posts:
Lilysfires · 03/04/2023 17:34

Anyone? :(

OP posts:
GlassBunion · 03/04/2023 17:45

I'd approach your line manager and tell them what you ve said here.
There's not much else you can do.

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