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School trip fear

12 replies

Bluefin · 18/05/2010 23:40

My 7 year old daughter had a sickness bug in February that lasted about 3 weeks; the last week of which was mostly confined to (possibly imaginary) nausea rather than real sickness. The illness has unfortunately had a lasting psychological effect, in that she is now greatly nervous about being or feeling sick (which can then of course happen psychosomatically). She has just been told that her class is going on a school trip next month, which will involve a coach journey of just over an hour. Normally she would be over the moon and very excited, but she?s really upset because of her worry of feeling sick. She associates coach journeys with children being sick, which is a fair enough conclusion, but she doesn't suffer from travel sickness. We have had a rational conversation about it, whereby she knows that she should of course go and that she is unlikely to be sick. But she says she won?t even enjoy it when she gets there because she?ll just be worrying about the journey home. She seems generally a little insecure about the whole trip, saying that she doesn?t want to travel that far without a family member, which again is unlike her. I feel so sorry for her ? she knows that it?s a real treat but she just wants a way out. I said to her that I would have a good think about it and come up with a suggestion to help her to deal with the day. I?ve already told her about travel sickness tablets, but she says that won?t work. Can anyone offer me any suggestions? Just to be clear, she has not actually been sick since February!

OP posts:
Chandra · 18/05/2010 23:44

The more attention you pay to the problem the more you are convincing her she has something to worry about. I will try to lighten the tone to reassure her she doesn't have anything to worry about.

scurryfunge · 18/05/2010 23:45

Can you practice a long journey with her and help her with coping strategies and reassure her fears etc. She needs to associate long journeys with something else,like seeing new sights, chatting, singing or whatever.

Goblinchild · 19/05/2010 07:11

Has she got a couple of friends who are going too? Could you look up the destination on a website and talk about it with her?
I agree that the more fuss and worry, the more stressed and looking for escape she's going to be. I'd take it as a forgone conclusion that she's going, in the nicest possible way.
It's normal to feel insecure about the unknown, and to have loved the experience when she comes back.

BeenBeta · 19/05/2010 07:24

Yes reassure her and perhaps take her on a journey in a coach with you.

Also give her a plastic bag that she can stuff in her pocket to be sick into. The fact she has that 'just in case' will help ease her anxiety. Sitting right at the front next to a teacher so she can look at the horizon is the best way of avoiding actual coach sickness and will also reassure her.

Above all, she must go on the trip. Feeling the fear and getting past it is crucial for her future life otherwise every school coach trip will be like this.

Bluefin · 19/05/2010 22:23

Thanks very much for your helpful comments, and I will suggest that she sits up front next to teacher if she is that worried about it. She only gets this fear of being sick if I'm not there to help her, but perhaps she would be a bit happier with teacher being briefed..

OP posts:
Hassled · 19/05/2010 22:36

Is there any way you could go as a parent helper?

Bluefin · 20/05/2010 14:22

Possibly, depending on what day the trip is on, but I was thinking that perhaps she needs to learn to cope without me - any thoughts on that?

OP posts:
Shaz10 · 20/05/2010 14:23

Give her some Sea Bands and tell her they will definitely stop the nausea?

whatwasthatagain · 20/05/2010 14:28

I was going to suggest you went along like Hassled. I have been on my DDs school trips in the past. Maybe once she has done a coach journey and been fine, she will be OK in the future.

deaddei · 20/05/2010 22:33

My dd now 13 has OCD and one of the issues is a fear of other people being sick. She couldn't go on any school journeys in year 7 because of it- but has had CBT and hypnotherapy and it has worked.
I would definitely take her on a coach trip yourself, which may help- if it gets worse, connsider CBT.9not sure how severe it is for you to do this)

Bluefin · 21/05/2010 13:32

Hmm, she is a little bit like that, deaddei, likes to have very clean hands etc. I don't think we're at the CBT stage yet, but out of interest, were you referred for that treatment or did you have to seek it out for yourself?

OP posts:
deaddei · 21/05/2010 21:03

(laughs hollowly)
It took months of going to the drs and finding someone who would listen- were referred to CAHMS, and luckily were given a lovely doctor on placement for 6 months. But it was all rushed- had appointments before school so dd wouldn't miss school and be asked questions by classmates.
It did help for a while, we were "released" last Sept, but by Xmas things were worse.
So we now see someone private- CBT and hypnotherapy and she is great.
DD is going next week and that will be it- we've had about 8 sessions.
She may go back if she needs it- OCD symptoms may stop, but they start doing something different!
I always knew from her being very small there was something not right about her- finally we know, but the years inbetween were hell.

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