Should we replace dd's hamster without telling her?

[NeatFreak]

Genuine question- dd's beloved hamster died during the night (she was only 5 months old so we hadn't prepared dd that this might happen).

We haven't told her yet as we found out only 5 minutes before leaving for school. Dh now thinks that we shouldn't tell her and replace her with another hamster. He is phoning round pet shops to see if they have any in stock...

I am positive that dd will notice- for one thing we would have to buy a baby hamster that would be smaller but she was a lovely, unusual colour and it would be hard to find an exact match. Ultimately, i think it is morally wrong and dd deserves to know the truth and it would give us an opportunity to talk about life (and death ). I think that she would be able to tell the difference immediately!

Dd is 6 and quite mature but a sensitive little thing...she will be heartbroken

RIP Hammy

No dont do it, please tell her when she gets home and offer teh chane to get another hamster if she wants.

the chance

Of course you should tell her. Don't lie to her.

No. And I speak as one who sneakily replaced a fish some months back (it was one of six that all looked the same to me). A neighbour replaced one of my childhood gerbils when it died while we were on holiday, and I noticed immediately..

Are you sure it's dead?

Tell her the truth. Then give her a few days and she will almost certainly want to get a new one.
We have lost two cats recently. The children were all heartbroken but soon asked if we could get a new one

Poor hammy

tell her!if shes old enough to be responsible for ahamster shes old enough to know the truth.

i stupidly tried replasing our budgie when eldest dc were little.that went unnoticed but then within the next two weeks they lost two grandparents.which arent replacable.

Thanks.
Dh is so determined not to tell her as he doesn't want her to get upset but I need to tell her the truth. Part of the reason we got hammy was to help her learn about death but we didn't expect it to happen so soon.

She's definitely dead . I did all the tips suggested to wake from hibernation and concluded that she wasn't hibernating.

Dd has been asking for a cat for months now but dh hasn't been keen and I've worried about the hamster.. maybe now is a good time to think about it, might make her feel better about it all.

Just thought I'd update that common sense prevailed and I won the argument. We told dd together, she totally broke down, asked lots of questions then gradually calmed down. We talked about getting another one and she asked if she could look at them in the pet shop without buying one...needless to say she fell in love with a gorgeous little long haired Syrian so we brought him home .

We had a little burial in the garden where she even made a speech (made me cry- 'such a waste of a beautiful hamster, thank you so much for being such a lovely pet. Love you, goodbye' ) Even 2yo ds got in on the action by saying goodbye and helping light a candle in the garden...

Thanks for the advice

That sound lovely.
I am amazed at childrens ability to turna round heartbreak so fast.

Lovely speech.

I hope you & DH feel better for telling the truth rather than the stress of waiting for your DD to notice the new Hammy.

Ahh, thats so sweet! Reminds me of our hamster (RIP) which came back from a holiday home having mysteriously changed sex!