Hi,
In need of advice.
My DH brother & partner forever leach of his parents. They both have good jobs, however they always claim they are broke and PIL always bail them out.
History: about 5 yrs ago, they returned from abroad with v little money & she went of to uni. As they lived local to PIL, they helped them out alot financially. Additionally if we all went out, PIL always paid for them to join us so they were never left out.
However as time has gone on, they still have this mentality that the parents should pay for them. For example, we are all meant to be going abroad in the summer for a family wedding. They are claiming they cannot afford to go due to expense. We all knew a year ago that this was happening, so plenty of time to save up to go, if you wanted. So they go round, bending PIL ears that they can't afford to go, and they are so jealous that everyone else is going. In the end, PIL are paying for them to go!!
Then they ring us complaining about BIL & SIL saying because they spent all their money on stuff for themselves, PIL have to bail them out all the time!
However things are getting too serious now, and she is being a manipulative cow! We got married last yr, and FIL kindly gave us a little money towards the wedding. When SIL found out, she asked if she could have the same when they got married, to which he agreed. Last yr, they sold their house & moved, and asked they asked if they could have the wedding money early as they needed some cash. FIL agreed, & also pointed out, that this was it for the money now.
Now they have called the wedding off, as they desperately want children, & feel that the funds spent on a wedding would be better used towards raising the children. However now she is trying to persuade FIL to pay for a "small" reception if they decide to get married! She is manipulating them saying that if they would get married, then that would ensure that the grandkids would take the family name (!)
The list is endless of the stuff they have pulled! I told FIL this weekend that he needed to stop bailing them out, and make them pay. I pointed out that they play on their emotions to get what they want. I just don't know how to stop this behavior.
Does anyone else have this problem, and how have they handled it? Thanks