My ex-husband and I have one daughter, now 13 years old. We've been to Court twice re residency, both times we were given week on/week off shared care.
He then 'left' his job (ie was fired) & moved over 100 miles away to read for an Oxford degree (he hoped), leaving our daughter with myself and my husband. Ex got a new job which lasted less than a year before he resigned & he's been dossing at a friend's house since December 2009 (he's 51).
We're off to Court again - he's called the EWO on our daughter a few times (they called to find her in school & admitted the story they were told bore little resemblance to the truth) - he also spoke to Social Services & told them she was going to school dirty with matted hair (you can imagine how she liked THAT. He seems to have forgotten that at the age of 13 they dress themselves & thus he was insulting her).
Now I've had a letter from SS to say they're coming to see us due to a 'referral'. Ex has admitted to daughter that he's the one that's setting SS on to us, but I have no idea as to his accusations. He's tried accusing my husband of being violent towards her (rich, since my ex is the one who's kicked & punched her) and even said I had sexual urges towards our daughter (oh, didn't mean it, my solicitor slipped that in).
Does anyone know what SS do? I do my darndest to ensure our daughter is happy, well fed, secure & well taken care of, even though we're below the poverty line & Daddy doesn't put a penny towards her upkeep (that's why he resigned his last job, I gather). One hears such horror stories of them. I appreciate that they have to follow through with tips, especially bearing in mind recent events but I'm fretting about it.
I'd love to scream at him, shout, hit him; even though I know that not only would it play into his hands but also I wouldn't dare - even after 7 years of being divorced I'm still scared of him. He's terribly vindictive and knows my weakness is our daughter, which is why he tried to wipe me out of her life for so long.
Do SS understand that sometimes someone sets them on a parent merely to cause trouble? Can I ask them WHAT they've been told, or do I just make an educated guess?