'Friend' i no longer want contact with won't leave me alone

[berniew]

Someone I used to work and socialise with a few years ago will not leave me alone. There were a few times in our relationship she really hurt me either through lack of support or criticising decisions I had made and about 3 years ago I decided I no longer wanted to be subjected to her 'friendship' any longer. For about a year and a half she continually texted and phoned me - usually when pissed- and I made no effort to contact her so eventually she stopped. Unfortunately I bumped into her recently and she said she wanted to meet up some time and she knew that 'it was all her' (i.e. the reason I have not been in touch) but didn't apologise and just went on about how it had made her feel really bad when i stopped phoning.
I don't have any desire to rekindle the friendship but am terrible at confrontation. Please tell WWYD?!!

I would carry on as you were before. not ringing her, not texting her, not arranging anything.

if she puts you on the spot, say I'm really tied up now' in a dead pan voice so she knows.

Don't fall for any emotional blackmail. We all outgrow people she needs to take the hint. Ignore her she sounds like she'll just drain you.

Thanks! Will continue the illusive behaviour and avoid confrontation- hoorah!

Am sorry but I think you need to tell her because she may be torturing herself as to what she has done and may genuinely not realise why you no longer wish to be friends. I was on the receiving end of this sort of behaviour once and it hurt me A LOT.. As it happenned I bumped into the the person who had been blanking me and she had a very good reason which was NOTHING to do with my conduct as a friend, but I will never forget how hurt, bewildered and upset I felt.

If you dislike confrontation then put it in an email or text but don't leave her hanging. It really is uneccesarily cruel

Thanks notalone. I think yours was more the answer i was expecting. I know I should tell her and i've been taking the easy way out. I don't think she does realise how much she upset me before- she thinks it's all about one issue, but like I said there were quite a few times she hurt me.
Looks like I need to get some balls....

What Notalone said. Good luck berniew.

Bernie - I think the longer it goes on the harder it gets to say anything / do anything about it. I must admit I wouldn't relish the idea of the conversation either which is why I suggested an email. Cowardly? Maybe, but at least you can get everything down that you need to say without forgetting important bits or getting over emotional / shouty. Write it, save it, go back to it the next day and then send it to make sure it reads the way you want it to. And good luck!

OK. I did it. Sent an email explaining how I felt and reasons for not being in touch and that i didn't have any desire to rekindle the friendship. She mailed me back and said she understood as she knows she wasn't a very good friend throughout some tough times in my life (and other times too).
SO relieved- feel like a huge weight has been lifted. Will be far more upfront (and possibly even confrontational (!) ) in the future.
Thanks for the advice!