Hen do dilemma

[NotBreeVanDeKamp]

Got an email last week inviting me to the hen do of a friend who I was very close with, less so these days. Do is an overnight job in the north with a daytime activity.I live quite far south. My dd will be 21 weeks old and is being exclusively bf. I hadn't planned to wean her by then, but maybe after.

WWYD? Would you somehow go? What would you do about feeding dd? Childcare for dc1 is another dilemma but I wanted people's feedback on this first.

I went away for 2 nights when DS was about 7 months old - he was weaned (just) but still bf. I left expressed milk for him, and took a pump with me, which worked ok, and I carried on bf afterwards without any problems.

Leaving him with DH actually really helped them bond, and although I missed him, it was lovely to have a couple of nights away with the girls, and to have some uninterrupted sleep.

Would your DD take expressed milk from a bottle?

Only go to a hen do if you want to go and feel that it will mean something to your friend, the bride. Do not go if it's going to stress you out due to distance, money, children etc. It's one thing to use the children as an excuse when they're teenagers, but realistically, most people would understand if you're not keen to go when your baby is still less than six months.

Rationally I know you're right BL. I just feel guilty as the hen sounded rather disappointed. Possibly this is because I'd first said the reason I probably couldn't go was because my dh is away on a long planned weekend and I have no one to look after ds1, but then added the stuff about dd and breastfeeding.
I should also say, I'm crap, crap, at expressing. I couldn't do iwth with ds1 and just haven't bothered with dd.

I don't think you should feel guilty, you've looked at the options, and it looks like it's not really practical. I'm sure your friend will understand, if not now, then when she has a baby of her own .