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Dh 's 40th Bithday Dilema

7 replies

paulaplumpbottom · 10/01/2010 13:13

My lovely DH is turning 40 in March. He has said that he does not want a party. I know that when some people say this they really want one but I know this is not the case for him. He would hate all the attention. He says he just wants to have a night out with a very small group of friends. He specified no family. All of this was ok by me even though I would have liked to throw him a party.

My MIL is irritated that I am not throwing a party even though I have explained the reason why. She is now saying that if I don't throw a party that she will throw him a suprise party. She throws the worst parties and probably won't invite any of our friends.

So do I let her throw a party he will really hate or be pushy with him and tell him I really want to throw him a party that I know he will at least enjoy a little. I can't tell him about what his mom has said because then she will accuse me of ruining a suprise.

I usually get on so well with MIL and I really love her so I don't want this to turn nnasty.

Please help!

OP posts:
compo · 10/01/2010 13:15

God that's a crap situation to be in
could you tell mil you are having a small do at yours and then just do tea and cake with just family?

Hullygully · 10/01/2010 13:16

Oh dear. I think I would tell him and then he could arrange to be "away" the date of the party and it wouldn't be your fault because of course you hadn't told him. Or arrange a little accident for her in a supermarket carpark.

ChloeHandbag · 10/01/2010 13:17

Have you told her that he doesn't want one?

paulaplumpbottom · 10/01/2010 13:18

I did suggest that. We do that every year. Its actually more for the kid's benefit. We have cake and ice-cream after a casual family meal. He loves this. Its homey. She says that because its is 4oth that a fuss must be made. He hates fuss though.

OP posts:
paulaplumpbottom · 10/01/2010 13:20

I have told her several times that he doesn't want one.

I did consider saying that as a birthday suprise I would be taking him away for the weekend ( his birthday is on a Sat) but she just said she could do it another weekend. We can't be busy every weekend.

OP posts:
paulaplumpbottom · 10/01/2010 14:22

bump

OP posts:
compo · 10/01/2010 14:27

Well if you have told her several times then tell hm what she is planning then
I don't see what else you can do

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