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Original poster

Uncle being fleeced by 'kind' neighbour

27 replies

alkar · 19/09/2009 17:32

Just found my 85 year old great uncles bank statement, he has given his cashcard to his 35 year old neighbour to do his food shopping, over the course of a month she has spent £500 at asda / aldi / farmfoods etc which is a lot to spend on one person and these places aren't the dearest supermarkets around are they?

Cash has been drawn out to the amount of £2000 and five trips to frankie and bennys and one to a toby carvery. £200 for car insurance (he doesn't drive) and a few more odd bits.

Me and my sister inadvertently found the bank statement and now we dont know what to do for the best as he thinks the sun shines out of this golddigger.

Any advice anyone?

OP posts:
lavenderkate · 19/09/2009 17:34

Get the cash card back immediately.

get a lawyer.

bumping for you as there are plenty on here!

thesouthsbelle · 19/09/2009 17:35

get that card cancelled ASAP - report it as stolen.

Hassled · 19/09/2009 17:35

I would call the police. This is theft.

EldonAve · 19/09/2009 17:36

You need to get the card stopped asap
Personally I would be calling the bank and the police

TeamEdwardTango · 19/09/2009 17:38

Call the police. It is theft. I am really on your behalf!
Call the bank ASAP, explain situation.

The bloody cheek of that woman!

Original poster
alkar · 19/09/2009 17:39

Can we stop the card instead of him? What if she says he's given it to her?

OP posts:
cornsillk · 19/09/2009 17:40

I would let the bank know about your concerns. I'm sure they'll look into it.

thesouthsbelle · 19/09/2009 17:40

does he know about all of the additional things she's been getting on his card?

mustrunmore · 19/09/2009 17:41

I dont think she'll say that, given the evidence of the statements. She's a bit thick really isnt she? at least just take out cash, not bloody car insurance etc which no way can be genuine...

EldonAve · 19/09/2009 17:42

You need to discuss it with him really
Unless you have POA to deal with his affairs

bubblerock · 19/09/2009 17:42

I would contact the police for advice

TeamEdwardTango · 19/09/2009 17:45

Call the police and the bank for advice.
Do talk to you uncle, try not to be rude about her, just ask him if he knew that she is using his money for these "extras".

TeamEdwardTango · 19/09/2009 17:45

Call the police and the bank for advice.
Do talk to you uncle, try not to be rude about her, just ask him if he knew that she is using his money for these "extras".

Original poster
alkar · 19/09/2009 17:49

Thanks for the responses

He bought her a car when he could no longer drive and she uses it to take him to places so I guess she could say thats why he pays for the car insurance.

Tried ringing the bank - no answer. Not sure theres a lot we can do til monday. My sister is going to talk to him tomorow and say she can help him with his money as she's worried about 'dodgy people' out there.

He doesn't have children so its all down to me and my sister.

OP posts:
EldonAve · 19/09/2009 17:53

age concern have a helpline - they may be able to advise you

TeamEdwardTango · 19/09/2009 17:54

Ah well, if he bought the car and she ferries him around, then maybe the car insurance is fair.
But the restaurants and excess shopping? Not on.

vinblanc · 19/09/2009 17:54

You can contact social services regarding a vulnerable adult.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 19/09/2009 17:56

Does your great Uncle know that you've found the bank statements?.

Your great uncle has been taken advantage of by someone who could not ultimately resist the temptation put in front of her. Contact the Police, his bankers and also speak to Age Concern or Help the Aged. These last two can advise you further re his finances and how best to protect them from theft like this. Financial abuse like this is not unknown unfortunately and many elderly people are prone to this because they are very trusting.

A trusted family member needs to control his bank account as of now; the bank can provide the forms. This needs to be done asap.
You cannot personally stop his account, you cannot operate it in any way currently.

Who is in possession of the card now?.
Have withdrawals been made from the cash machine?. That is more tricky. If he gave her his PIN number the bank would likely see him at fault as he was not supposed to give out that particular information to anyone else. You may not get those particular funds back, you may even have to pursue a civil case against his neighbour to do so.

QueenOfFuckingEverything · 19/09/2009 17:58

Financial Abuse of Older People

Have a read.

cat64 · 19/09/2009 18:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
alkar · 19/09/2009 18:01

She has the card and I think she has the PIN. He has about 400k so he wont notice small amounts missing. I'm happy to write off what she has already taken but want to stop her from taking any more.

He has always been a bit tight with his money and has inherited a lot from his brother. He lives in a 2 bed terrace house so it doesnt look like he would have as much as he has. She doesn't work and as far as I know never has.

OP posts:
TeamEdwardTango · 19/09/2009 18:03

Oh yes, DH's gret uncle was financially abused by the woman he lodged with. She'd taken his banking cards, pension book etc.
Age Concern were fantastic and helped get him a new place to live and sort out the money.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 19/09/2009 18:14

"She has the card and I think she has the PIN. He has about 400k so he wont notice small amounts missing. I'm happy to write off what she has already taken but want to stop her from taking any more".

It goes without saying that you need to get the card back. Don't be happy to write the amount off even though he's loaded. A lot more would have been taken as well if you had not spotted the statement.

As said before though if she has the PIN number and he readily gave to it her, the bank may well not return the money obtained from the cash machine. You need to speak to his bank branch as a matter of course.

Either you or your sister need to take financial charge of his affairs. Clearly his neighbour cannot be trusted any longer. Its a great shame really, she was probably honest to start with but the temptation to spend his cash on her own self was ultimately too great.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 19/09/2009 18:15

"She has the card and I think she has the PIN. He has about 400k so he wont notice small amounts missing. I'm happy to write off what she has already taken but want to stop her from taking any more".

It goes without saying that you need to get the card back. Don't be happy to write the amount off even though he's loaded. A lot more would have been taken as well if you had not spotted the statement.

As said before though if she has the PIN number and he readily gave to it her, the bank may well not return the money obtained from the cash machine. You need to speak to his bank branch as a matter of course.

Either you or your sister need to take financial charge of his affairs. Clearly his neighbour cannot be trusted any longer. Its a great shame really, she was probably honest to start with but the temptation to spend his cash on her own self was ultimately too great.

waitingforfanjo · 20/09/2009 14:48

I'm not sure the OP or her sister can take charge of his financial affairs without the uncle agreeing to it. Informally, yes obviously THEY can have his bank card etc, just as the neighbour did, if he decides to let them. But obtaining Power of Attorney is a different thing.

IIRC from my own experiences with elderly mad in-laws, you cannot have Power of Attorney to legally run someone's finances if that person doesn't agree to it and sign the necessary legal paperwork. Unless they are so obviously away with the fairies they clearly can't decide for themselves.
My MIL is mentally ill and often sends ludicrous amounts of money to charity, (far more than she can afford) because she thinks those begging letters they send out to everyone are actually written to her personally, and they are expecting a reply. I've tried & tried to explain but she can't understand.

But because she's just about compus mentis enough to run her day-to-day affairs, we cannot have POA because she wouldn't let us. As she doesn't believe she needs help.

Sorry, I wasn't trying to complicate matters, just wanted to point out that although several posters have said the OP needs to take charge of the uncle's money, it isn't necessarily straightforward.