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DH gone off sex

5 replies

mynamewasgone · 09/06/2009 18:49

I am 5 months pregnant, this is our first child together although we both have DC from our first marriages.

We have a really good relationship and we are both really happy about this baby. The only trouble is that DH has gone right off sex.

Its been months and I really miss that side of our relationship.

I have tried talking to DH and he says he has been to tired but he sits up til 1 every night watching tele whereas Im in bed by 10.

I have asked him if he finds me unattractive pregnant but he swears that he still fancys me.

I just don't know what to do about it. I don't have a desperate need for sex but really miss the intimacy it brings.

He isn't having an affair or anything, I'm not worried about that. I'm just worried that he has gone right off me and that its only going to get worse once the baby is here.

Not sure what to do

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ABetaDad · 09/06/2009 19:07

Have you asked if he frightened of hurting the baby?

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mynamewasgone · 09/06/2009 19:23

I have asked him that and he says he isn't. We have had a few little scares though so maybe it is bothering him.

I just don't get it because everything else is great. He is so supportive and attentive, and is great with the kids. We just had a lovely family holiday and I was hoping that getting away and relaxing might help but it didn't.

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ABetaDad · 09/06/2009 19:57

Well maybe he is a bit worried about the scares. Strikes me yu need to persuade him to come to bed early and you need to talk it out of him.

There seems to be no physical reason, or indeed relationship reason so it must be something he is worried about.

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LeonieSoSleepy · 09/06/2009 20:02

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wrigglershouse · 09/06/2009 22:30

Are you doing other stuff? You could easily get some relief, so to speak, with stuff other than sex. And I don't think most men would say no to a blow job (although of course some don't like it). If you have been asking him about sex many men get all worried about it and don't want to and are afraid of it not working and so on. Taking that off the menu for a while and offering other things may get him going again.

And offer positive reinforcement for any future pregnancies - "oh yeah, pregnancy is good, the wife gets realy horny and I get a load of BJs/hand jobs/insert other preferred method of titillation".

Lots of men also find that if they are all interested in some other form of excitement things just sort of develop from there...