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DH's mid-life crisis appears to be manifesting as possession by the spirit of Jeremy Beadle - advise me on how to avenge myself.

3 replies

snigger · 20/11/2008 16:06

I popped into town this afternoon, and called DH to say I had to go to the bank, did he need anything, blah blah blah.

I have a notoriously bad memory, and coming out of the bank I couldn't find my car, which I was CERTAIN was parked outside. I did goldfish faces for a bit, wandered up and down, then thought, no, it's definitely gone.

Our local police unit is just down the street, so I wandered along there, calling DH first to tell him that someone had obviously stolen our skip on wheels car.

"You've forgotten where you've parked it again" says he.

"Splutter, indignant squawking, not likely" say I.

"You've done it before" he intones with a note of censure.

"I'm losing my mind" I acknowledge.

"Have another look" says he.

The bastard merry little joker was driving it towards me, grinning from ear to ear. He'd passed the car in town, moved it, and watched me to make sure I didn't call or visit the police.

This cannot go unavenged - I was convinced someone had made off with my glovebox stash of treacle toffee.

OP posts:
mrsmaidamess · 20/11/2008 16:07

ha this is funny.

Can you shave his eyebrows off in the dead of night? Thats sure to make him rethink his 'Game for a laugh' ways

mrsmaidamess · 20/11/2008 16:08

I left a plastic dog turd on my husbands pillow btw. Oh! How we laughed!

Rhubarb · 20/11/2008 16:09

chilli seeds in his grots.
Glue telephone to receiver and then call the number and watch as he tries to pick it up.
Black marker pen decorations when he's asleep (permanent works best).
Replace money in wallet with Monopoly money.

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