How can I trim my budget?

[Yesanotherella]

No, not that budget! My outgoings! My largest spend is currently my food shop. We are a family of 4, 2 young DC (5 and 9), mostly vegetarian, but some severe food allergies so there are a few brands I won't compromise on (on the advise of the allergy clinic). I'm really feeling the squeeze of cost of living these days and watching every cent that leaves my account. Any suggestions for cutting down further?

Here's what I do already:

• As much food from discounters (Aldi, Asda) as possible, buy at multiple stores for whomever has the best offers that week, and always own brand (except as noted above for allergy reasons, but this is just 1-2 items), I also buy yellow stickers or day-old bread when available
• Spices I buy in bulk for a low price (for example at an ethnic market)
• We eat mostly vegetarian, fish just 1-2x per month and I roast a chicken 1-2x per year
• I do meal planning for the week to make best use of ingredients and cut down on food waste. Any recipes with "frivolous" ingredients will be modified (so no fresh herbs, for example)
• DH and I always bring lunch to work
• No coffees out
• We no longer eat out, except for birthdays or anniversaries
• We always take a picnic lunch on days out (DC can have a treat, an ice lolly or similar)
• All clothes (except socks and pants) are second-hand; if I ever buy anything new it's only deeply discounted
• Almost all furniture is second-hand
• I sell things on vinted/ebay/gumtree
• DH and I have sim-only phones
• We subscribe to Amazon Prime and Disney, no other streaming services (not even a TV license)
• I don't do any beauty/skin/hair treatments (nor does DH), DC do go to the hairdresser once every 4 months or so. (They've both got difficult hair to trim so I pay for them to not look like flowerpots!); DH also goes once every 4-5 months. I trim my own ends. DH has psoriasis so he requires a special shampoo but for myself and DC I buy whatever is on sale at Boots/superdrug/etc
• I don't have any hobbies besides reading books, which I get from the library
• I don't actually enjoy shopping so not much in the way of frivolous purchases
• I don't wear makeup except on special occasions
• I don't drink, smoke, or do drugs. DH has 1 beer on Friday and Saturday nights.
• We haven't turned the heat on yet, it's 17 in our home right now, we are all in warm jumpers and have warm blankets on the sofa and on the beds
• We don't run a car, all transport is via the tube/bus/walking or by bicycle

What am I missing? A few years ago, I made less than I do now but I felt I could save a bit each month. The past few months I've hardly had anything left over and I'm constantly stressed by it. Any suggestions?

OP says the food is her largest outlay so it seems she isn’t paying rent (low or no mortgage) and has low childcare costs.

I agree it’s very difficult to understand why she’s struggling so much.

Martin Lewis has advice on getting Disney a bit cheaper.

I’m wondering if the OP and partner both very part time or omething. Or if this is a bit of a wind up. Because on repeat reading, this situation doesn’t make one iota of sense, even taking into account expensive London housing costs.

Agree this doesn't add up. Unless you've not mentioned part time working, you should have around £5/6k pm coming in and say food is your biggest expense so it can't be that all your money goes on housing and childcare, leaving not enough for everything else.

What does your budget look like on paper? Pounds in and out?

You can also download a year's worth of transactions from your accounts to see what actually goes on housing, bills, food and whatever else you spend on.

I know you say you don't spend any money but it has to be going somewhere. And unless you’ve really misrepresented your grocery shopping (because fresh herbs are 50 p a pack in Aldi so if you consider those too expensive it can't be that you're living on asparagus, blueberries, Bold beans and artisan granola) I can't see how your grocery shopping is that expensive.

Are you putting a lot of your money in savings and counting this as an essential bill?

As others have said, it would be more helpful if you could post your outgoings so you know where your money is going and where savings could be made. It sounds like you’re doing well generally but the money must be going somewhere.

By "largest spend is currently my food shop" do you mean after rent/mortgage, childcare, essential bills etc? As others have said, if it's literally your biggest expense I'm not sure why you are struggling. Are you happy to post a ballpark figure for food shopping, since you've asked us to focus on it?

With the best will in the world OP, that list is entirely meaningless without information on the amount you have coming in in salaries every month and any other income and details of the other outgoings, e.g. rent or mortgage, any debt being paid off, transport costs, council tax, utilities, etc.

I would look at Northern cities with big hospitals and completely move. I feel the cost of housing would be the most expensive thing so moving to somewhere cheaper could be the big difference.

it is really hard as things are constantly creeping up in price. I’m having a similar issue and these sound like really frugal measures. But…..

This is a list of things you don’t do and it isn’t helpful on its own. Have you tracked every penny of your spending for a few months? Do you know exactly where you do spend? There could be categories in here that we don’t know about.

I have been using YNAB for a few years and it’s been really helpful for this. You have to pay for it, although they have some free trials. It’s a little bit of a learning curve but it’s great for tracking every single penny and your spending habits in general. Literally everything I spend I have to assign to a category. I don’t allow my self any purchases that aren’t itemised.

you can also spilt a transaction too so if you picked up uniform at the supermarket, it doesn’t just get lumped in with food. likewise any annoying Amazon purchases where you might have bought printer ink and a present for a kids party. You can put these into the correct category. I thought I was spending a ridiculous amount on food until I realised how much of my supermarket bill was extras, knowing hasn’t changed this spending but now I can really watch these and cut back in the right places!

You could keep a spreadsheet but I just find YNAB easier because I can tally my running total with my bank balance. I input the daily spending manually and I know exactly how much I have left for the month at any given moment. Usually very little!

At the end of every month I will pull the categories into a separate spreadsheet for analysis. So I can see what costs are increasing over time.

ynab isn’t great for forecasting, but it’s not really meant for this so you will need to pull the category totals out and do that separately. But it is fantastic for day to day spending!

The worst category I found was water. We paid £40/50 a month 6 years ago. We actually use less water now than we did then as we’ve tried hard to cut back, but despite this our bill is now £160 (south east water I’m looking at you!) there is nothing I can do about this as we are tied to our supplier. This category I have to accept but other utility’s I have some leeway with and when you track absolutely everything you may find other areas that you can cut back on things you realise you regularly spend and would be better bought in bulk to save money.

Solidarity though - it is really tough! Maybe you have tracked like this already? But if not it’s worth a shot…

Thank you for the helpful suggestions. I did try YNAB yonks ago but haven't paid the subscription. I do try to track everything that goes in and out (including obsessively checking my account every day!)

Apologies if it wasn't clear above, I do not work full-time, I am part-time, DH is full time. We also have had bereavements and ongoing caretaking these past years that makes taking on extra hours challenging. DH's dad has cancer and diabetes (not well controlled) and DH's mum has dementia. They're no longer married but need a lot of help, so if DH isn't working he's often with them and I'm then with the DC.

You say part time but how many days / hours do you do a week? And what are the costs of your main outgoings like mortgage / rent, utilities, public transport, food shopping etc. Without knowing this it’s difficult to get a clear picture of your situation and what could be done differently to help. Could you get a second job doing anything to bring in more income, as that’s the only solution I can think of with the info you’ve given.

How many hours a week are you both working?

I would stop the psoriasis shampoo for a while and check whether it is actually making a difference. Pause Disney for a while.

If you have a mortgage then extend your term.

Can you claim carers allowance?

If renting check benefits eligibility.

Do you have a Blue Light card? Does your nhs employer also have a scheme like vivup etc? Both enable you to buy gift vouchers at discount for all major retailers & have discounts / money off as well. You get a free Esso Card which gives you money off petrol (plus nectar points).

Do you use all the loyalty apps? I actually find sainsburys/ nectar good as the price match aldi. Then you get your own special points & prices on top - then you pay for this with your discounted giftcards.

I've also recently got a Chase account where you get 2% cashback on groceries, petrol / transport and eating out etc. This adds up & can be used where & when you can't get discounted giftcards eg: Aldi & Lidl. Chase also do good savings rates & I have it as a second account that I use just for these purposes (no overdraft facility as no credit check required).

Finally, Farmfoods & similar also are fab. They have some quality brands & items at low prices and they do money off coupons (and you can use discounted giftcards or Chase on top).

Also check out the Trolley app for brands you use regularly and hotukdeals too. I make/save £100-£150 per month doing the above.

If you (or anyone) would like a Chase referral code to earn £50 then let me know.

What are your outgoings re housing and childcare?

But none of these are likely relevant or necessary. Unless the OP works something like 30% WTE, she will earn too much for carer's allowance.

Even if the specialist shampoo is £40 a bottle, the average man is only going to use 2/3 bottles a year.

Disney is what, a tenner a month?

OK if they rent and pay childcare they might be entitled to some UC (or tax free childcare) so worth checking but seeing as it's only going to be wrap around care it's not like they're facing thousands a month in nursery fees.

Even with the OPs part time working it's still unclear why they have no money left after such a basic lifestyle unless their rent is about £3k pm in which case the obvious first question is is it possible to move somewhere less expensive.

Do you actually need to trim expenses or are you panicking that prices will rise?

Do you save any money?

Do you have savings?

How much is your rent or mortgage?

How much is your childcare?

Amazon Prime and Disney Channel. One could go at least.

Look at the vegetables and fruit you are buying. Are they the cheap ones per kilo?

Do you have access to a garden with soil not slabs? If so growing in the ground may save some money. Don't do in pots unless you have room to make your own compost and get free pots. Not economical. (Parents garden as DH goes over a lot. ) You need something easy you put in and leave to do it's own thing.

Community gardens?

Unless you're getting into debt or really struggling, I'd say give yourself a break for a while. Life is tough at the moment with kids and parents and you may have to accept that for a couple of years there'll be pennies left in the account each month. That'll change eventually. Lots of people have very lean years where they barely get through - it sounds like otherwise you're doing well, so maybe ease off on the money pressure for the time being and focus on managing the many responsibilities you have. Do treat yourself every now and again if you can at all afford it - constant scrimping can get very depressing and it can make you more likely to mess things up in the long run.

You haven’t mentioned mortgage/rent or bills, which is a pretty big omission. Is that what all the money goes on, apart from food? Have those changed recently?