On the verge of a breakdown

[Ondeverge]

I have OCD and other mental health problems.

I have been struggling massively lately. I am in NHS Level 3 talking therapy right now so a lot has been stirred up on top of my normal issues. I don't have a session this upcoming Monday as usual as therapist is away and I wish I did.

I am feeling so bad. I had a funeral this morning which has set off all kinds of things in my head. Universal credit have started a review of my account and want to do a phone interview to go through 4 minths worth of bank statements and now I have just come home to a letter from my housing association saying they want to do a property inspection and interview for the 3rd year in a row on Monday morning. I can't even call to cancel as they closed at 4.

I can't deal with it all. I can't. I don't want to discuss my bank statements with someone. I don't want someone coming in my house and going through every room right now and asking me a load of questions.

I know its normal things but right now it feels like a massive intrusion and I just can't deal with it all.
Summer holidays just started and I am dreading it. Already feeling like a failure as DS is under CAMHs and I know he will turn nocturnal and not want to leave his room for 6 weeks.

I'm so tired of it all.

What support do you want OP? Someone who’s been through similar and can tell their experience? I can do that.

Just a rant? Go ahead

Advise?

You’ve every right to feel overwhelmed, that’s a lot to deal with at once. Do you have anyone in your life who can help?

What kinds of things do you use to distract yourself when you’re struggling? I personally do craft activities or go for a walk in nature, I find it distracts my brain for a little while.

Most importantly you’re not a failure, you’re doing your best with the hard cards you’ve been dealt and clearly getting your DC the support needed.

Im sorry you are feeling so low. I think you need to tell the authorities that you ate mentally vunerable as it will mean they ate more supportive. Please engage as it be worse of you ignore. I couldnt understand my tax bill at all after my mum died yet reading contracts is what i do. My brain wouldn’t work. When i by chance explained i wasnt coping due to bereavement the lady changed stance was helpful and waived the penalty charges. Anyone can become vulnerable.
can any friend help you? Can you run any of yout stuff through chat gbt for concise help? Sorry i cant help more. Just a reminder tobtry and eat well tuna sweetcorn jacket pot maybe better food helps a little. Everything will get sorted in time i hope. Big hug

Just thinking can you call mind for support? Can someone at citizens advice help? Write a list of everything bothering you even if ironing then try and just tackle 1 thing. If your son turns nocturnal try not to worry many people work night shifts this doesn't matter right now.
going through bank statements may not be as bad as you fear. Anxiety causes anxiety and the thought can often be worse than the atcual event.

Can you change the date of your inspection with your housing association. Just explain that you're mentally unwell at the moment and it's too much to deal with at this time. I'm a HA tenant and have these inspections every year too so I know how annoying they are. Just give them a call, you'll be surprised how helpful they can be if you just explain your issues

I text her explaining I was grieving and had been at a funeral today. That my mental health is very poor at the moment.

I asked if I would have to have them every year as long as I live here and if my partner (lives here) could take the appointment on my behalf as I can't face anything like this right now.

She just completely ignored everything I said :(

Sorry you're going through it OP, but the fact that the text was so short and impersonal makes me think that they not really bothered who receives them for the inspection, they just want to get into the property.

My advice would be to text them back in the same tone:

" I can confirm that my partner will be available to meet inspectors at the property on 20th July"

Small steps. Get through one task at a time. I get like this and it's like my mind overwhelms me more than the actual things I have to do and I just try focus on each day and when I get through it I realise it was ok. It's never as bad as you imagine and you will feel proud when you get through it.

It is so hard I know. And this heat says your energy and makes everything worse.
I am so sorry that the bureaucrats seem to be so lacking in humanity. It is not acceptable at all.
Take care ...

Saps