Has anyone had a "sleepunder" party?

[saltshaker99]

My DD turns 8 this autumn and she really wants a sleepover but I'm saying no - our sleep is already very disrupted by our toddler, we don't have space for the 4 friends she wants to all sleep, it's a mixed sex group, and I know a couple of them still need their mum to sit with them to go to sleep. So, no. But I've heard of a "sleepunder" where they all do sleepover things in their PJs and then get picked up late. Has anyone had one of these and can tell me whether it worked out? What sort of activities did they do? What sort of pickup time is appropriate? Did they all get hideously disregulated and wasn't worth it or was it fine??

We did this recently for my DD turning 12 as she hates big sleepovers. We did 4-9:30pm. Activities were a swim, they ate dinner, marshmallows around fire then they generally chilled in the lounge (dance routines and chatting and played Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza and lots of extremely loud singing).

Sounds like a good idea, especially as there's usually a few kids who can't quite cope with a full on sleepover.

Sounds like a good compromise to me!

I picked my dc up from a sleepover in a planned way so they ended up as a sleep under and I have had others do that.
Usually someone had been sleeping over but logistics meant that someone else couldn't.
They watched movies, ate popcorn and generally had the nonsense of a sleepover. There was the same disregulation but at least more sleep during the night so usually the next day went better.I think pick up was around 10/10:30pm. I quite liked them.

I think this is a fantastic idea, following!

I didn't know there was a name for this! We've done it, we've also done full sleepovers for comparison and I much prefer them going home late!

We ended up walking the girls home as a big group, they brought torches and we gave them glowsticks. Told them to whisper and there were lots of shhhes and giggles. They liked being out and about in the wee hours. We took them home at midnight, probably dropped the last one off around half past.

We did this for a group of 6 year olds. Hired an outdoor cinema for the back garden and had them all snuggled down with blankets from 9pm to pick up at 10.40pm, Before that, we did all the usual party stuff.

I love the walk home idea, fun for them!

I think that in practice sleepovers often end up being sleepunders for one or more participants when they're quite young. DS certainly changed his mind about wanting to stay the night quite late on more than one occasion, and I remember a friend having to drive a child home at 2 am once because they'd had a nightmare and the child's parents car was in the garage overnight.

Yes seen this

5-8pm
5pm order in pizza (my kids think ordering is very glam)
eat food then into pyjamas
some chilled games like board games or card games
snuggle into a sofa nest and watch a movie with popcorn
before they leave a ‘midnight feast’ could be s’mores or something else sleepovery if you have access to bbq or gas hob for marshmallows

Yes it’s a brilliant option, as long as you make it very clear to all parents that there’s definitely no option of it turning into a full sleepover! I can’t just imagine CF parents texting at 8pm with sudden unavoidable reason as to why they can’t pick up and “Would it be possible for DC to stay over after all?” 🙄

Sounds really fun but you have to make it very clear what time pick up is. As a compromise could you allow 1 of her female friends to sleep over?

We did this for a friend when I was about 8. Went in PJs, played games, ate pizza tea, watched a film with sweets and popcorn, and then were picked up late - it was fab.

Yes I do this with my dd 9. She’s tried the odd proper one and it hasn’t gone well, but she loaves the pjs and treats etc

Nice idea but from the name I was imagining a very very different sort of party…

I’ve never heard of a ‘sleepunder’, but I love the sound of it. Sounds perfect to me.

Sounds like a plan but I’m astonished that 7/8 year olds that still need their mother to sit with them to get to sleep! I don’t think I’ve ever had to do that. Not even as babies.

Unless you’re offering to drop home I wouldn’t love it because it’s the whole evening gone waiting around to pick up, both of you have to stay in so someone can stay in the house with the sleeping youngest, can’t have a glass of wine as need to drive. I’d rather an actual sleepover tbh or a normal party at a normal time.

Agreed. I’d do it, because I wouldn’t want my child to miss out. But inwardly I’d be thinking “ffs, I’m normally in bed by now!”

I used to call them a “stay up all night pratting about over” and your idea is much more civilised.

I tried to convince my daughter to do this after a debacle of a first sleepover party. She is 13 now so hangs out later anyway but she used to love having dinner at a friends and hanging out until 9/10. Felt quite grown up.

If you do it for young kids I’d just have pickup an hour after your child’s usual bedtime so it feels special but not ridiculous. Every family is different so whatever this means at your house. And until pickup it’s just a sleepover party - food / crafts / maybe painting nails or similar?

I’ve done it. It was great. I dropped the kids off tho so their parents didn’t have to wait about. I think the parents appreciated the evening off as it’s been reciprocated.