Experiences of ADHD assessment and diagnosis in adulthood

[Zippidydoodah]

I have finally bitten the bullet and requested a private ADHD assessment.

I feel so relieved! I don’t know why. Like I’ve finally admitted to someone that I think this could be why I’m so shit at adulting.

Please share stories of ADHD in adulthood assessments/diagnoses?

Is there anyone out there who was assessed and found not to have it? Were you given strategies/ideas to support whatever difficulties you were having?

Please be kind. Thank you!

I will add that various friends of mine have suggested that I go for an assessment.

I don’t think there’s a need for a diagnosis as an adult unless you’re really struggling ie can’t do day to day tasks without another adult’s support, can’t keep a job etc. More beneficial for school aged children for EHCP. I likely have ADHD but I have a house, job etc and learnt how to cope with it.

I’m really not coping 😢

Thank you for your response, sorry should have said!

What do you mean by this? I keep alarms for appointments and events etc or else I’ll forget. Direct debits so I know payments are going out.

My diagnosis 6 years ago at 38 was life changing and I have a self employed job but I am so much kinder to myself now. Have strategies that help work with my brain not against it. These were all gleaned online and through coaching rather than the diagnosis itself but it has been so helpful to me.

The house is in chaos. I can’t focus on anything. I have extreme task paralysis. I’m throwing money away on not being organised enough to make lunch for work or even dinner for the kids. I constantly buy things I already have as I’ve forgotten I had them. There’s a much longer list!

Thank you for sharing 😊 Any advice for me please?

I think it’s too simplified to say it’s only beneficial for children. I believe my partner has ADHD. He relies heavily on me for everything and it would be helpful for the family if he was to be diagnosed but I can’t force him. People should think of their families too.

Exactly, @WhatYouWearing

I am seriously letting my children down. I don’t know what magic wand I’m expecting but I’m desperate.

Instead of paying for a diagnosis it’ll be quicker and cheaper to look at organisation tips and meal planning ideas. I’ve gotten better from reading tips online and just learning what works for me. I struggle to stay focused but I’m trying! Are you hoping to be medicated hence the diagnosis? I don’t want to be which is why I haven’t pursued a diagnosis.

You can’t help yourself till you understand yourself. I have this have been diagnosed since 16 I’m now 32. So your comment is not helpful at all.

I’m not being unkind but I think you’re judging by your own situation that doesn’t sound as severe. My partner is also BPD which complicates the matter and many people have more than one issue.

Everyone Is different and only a doctor can diagnose and help. The right medication too can be helpful I’ve learnt from people who take it so don’t rule that out.

Heyyy feel free to message me. I would like to point out the fact you have noticed all the things you struggle with. You’re not letting your children down at all. you need some support to make yourself feel more settled and have more routine etc. once you get a diagnosis and support you can start understanding yourself. Don’t beat yourself up life is to short 🩷

I'm of a generation when, as a child, autism, adhd, audhd etc presumably existed but nobody knew it did.

For you to say there is no need as an adult to have a diagnosis is yet another kick in the teeth. My whole life was chaos and failure and when I got my very late life unofficial diagnosis of autism, and probable audhd, it was like an absolution. It took away so much of the guilt I have always felt.

My buddy went for an assessment because he DH bugged her to. She doesn't think she has it. She said it cost £300 and lasted 17 minutes. They said she has it but she still thinks she doesn't.

Our son was diagnosed in his late 20's a few years ago. I think it really helped him (&us) to understand why he's so messy, constantly losing things, always needing to be busy etc He also realised for the first time that not everyone has constant noise/chatter in his brain, if that makes sense. He takes medication now & again if he's feeling very stressed.
He's also dyslexic which was eventually picked up in childhood after a lot of pressure from us to his school.
Good luck with your diagnosis, it won't change who you are, but possibly you'll be a little bit kinder to yourself & more understanding.

You’re not letting anyone down. You are not burying your head in the sand or letting someone else deal with it. You’re dealing with it head on!

I don’t know you but I’m proud of you. Good luck with your exploration of this and if it turns out not to be a fit for what you are experiencing, keep pushing until you have answers. Everyone deserves to live a happy life 💐

Awww I love this 🩷🩷🩷

I'm in my 30s and was diagnosed about a year ago (and also recommended to get assessed for autism which I haven't done yet).
Posters saying you don't need a diagnosis as an adult are wrong.
If you have ADHD then your brain works differently. It's not a matter of looking up organisational tips and setting alarms. What works for ADHD people is different than what works for neuro typical people, and it's helpful to know where you are.
You also will probably need medication if you are feeling like you can't cope, and a therapist that specialises in ADHD.
Whichever therapist you chose, knowing whether you have ADHD or not will help them help you based on how your brain works.
Since getting diagnosed I've also been able to cut myself some slack. For example, I know now my house will never be as tidy as my peers, but at least I am able to keep it sanitary which I wasn't before.

Quite honestly if these are your only issues and can be solved from a few strategies you probably don’t have ADHD.

Thank you for the love. I asked for kindness as I didn’t expect it, quite frankly, and I’m touched and grateful for it. ❤️

Reading meal planning tips online unfortunately doesn’t do a thing.

I have stacks of cookbooks and I love reading them but can never organise myself enough to actually cook something from them. I even often buy ingredients that still don’t get cooked. I throw away a ridiculous (and absolutely shameful) amount of food that’s gone bad because I haven’t cooked it.

Re: medication, like I said; I’m desperate. If medication works then yes please.

OP, I completely understand where you are coming from and will share a little about my recent experience.

I have always felt like I was living life on hard mode, I have always worked hard but all my accomplishments I fought tooth and nail for and was always quite stressed, with racing thoughts and a lot of chaos in my brain.

I thought everyone was like this so didn’t really think much of it.

It was in my late 30s that I felt life starting to unravel, becoming a parent, progressing at work, hitting a certain time of life, it felt like I couldn’t cope anymore and I started dreading work, missing deadlines in and out of work, and generally not taking much joy from life. I had no idea what this feeling was but knew it wasn’t going away and I was beginning to feel incredibly burned out and cyclical about life.

I referred myself privately and went down an ASD, then ADHD route. When the ADHD diagnosis was confirmed I felt relieved, seen and heard. My whole life looked different in retrospect and I did mourn for my younger self who had no idea she was struggling.

Im reasonably early post-diagnosis so am going to progress therapeutic/ coaching routes, I have also started medication and it’s made such a huge different in my self confidence, ability to get things done and general feelings about life. It’s been massive for me, it may not work for everyone, but if you are curious about it, I would recommend giving it a go if you get the opportunity.

Good luck with the process, it’s extremely admin heavy in my experience (doesn’t really play to our strengths!), but it’s worth it to get the answers you are seeking either way.