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Micromanager

3 replies

Stoicashellusually · 03/07/2026 13:35

I am after some tips to get me through dealing with my micromanager.

She's a nice person which makes it harder. She also knows she's a micromanager but doesn't change. She's the Director of the company so there's no one above her. I'm one of her senior leaders.

In previous roles, I've always been extremely highly performing and extremely well regarded by colleagues and customers. Now I feel a shadow of my former self.
.
She micromanages so much of my work that I no longer feel I can make a decisions. I'm exhausted, depressed and generally worn down. She tracks every aspect of work on our CRM, including emails sent. She picks up on the craziest of minute details and yet her time should be spent on building new business which means we're at risk of redundancies or even ending the company completely. Yes she still continues to spend hours proof reading documents rather than going after new business.

She says she's open to ideas and trusts us and yet I'm yet to see it after 2-3 years. She makes the decisions and leaves me to disseminate the info and deal with the chaos when the wider team are annoyed that they're snowed under.

We work remotely and yet I feel watched all day. I dread my 1:1s.

I can't go to HR as they are also line managed by her and also get micromanaged by her.

I know she won't change and I'm looking for something new but I don't want to jump from the frying pan into the fire. I want it to be the right thing I move onto. I'd love for advice for now to cope in the meantime as I feel I'm constantly fluctuating between states of flight, fight or freeze.

OP posts:
PrincessMonty · 03/07/2026 13:44

Solidarity-I had one of these, lovely woman but totally undermined my confidence in myself by monitoring my every move.

I moved job in the end. While I worked under her i bit my tongue a lot, it was a very tricky situation. Not helpful I know.

is she the kind of person you could have an honest conversation with? Along the lines of, “this is how I’m approaching this task. Please don’t check on every single step of it unless I ask you for help, because it makes me feel like you don’t trust me to do the work well”.

i tried that with my manager and she was very apologetic but didn’t change her ways

Stoicashellusually · 03/07/2026 17:40

PrincessMonty · 03/07/2026 13:44

Solidarity-I had one of these, lovely woman but totally undermined my confidence in myself by monitoring my every move.

I moved job in the end. While I worked under her i bit my tongue a lot, it was a very tricky situation. Not helpful I know.

is she the kind of person you could have an honest conversation with? Along the lines of, “this is how I’m approaching this task. Please don’t check on every single step of it unless I ask you for help, because it makes me feel like you don’t trust me to do the work well”.

i tried that with my manager and she was very apologetic but didn’t change her ways

I've had the conversation but nothing ever changes sadly

OP posts:
Stoicashellusually · 04/07/2026 14:16

I'd love some ideas for temporarily coping with it without it destroying me any further

OP posts:
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