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How do I repay generosity?

31 replies

CocSoc · 20/06/2026 14:29

An acquaintance of mine. We’re not friends, but have something in common so we’ve chatted and met occasionally. She’s lovely, and we’re both friendly.

She is unable to attend an event, which in total has cost her at least £300. So she’s asked around if anyone would like to attend in her place.

I have said yes, and how much would she like. She’s refusing to accept any money, which is lovely! I have accepted the offer, but really don’t want to leave it without at least giving her a token something as a thank you.

It is very generous of her. But in her mind, she’d rather it was used than no one go, and be more of a waste. Which makes sense.

What could I get her that says thank you, but doesn’t offend?… I did think of putting £100 in an envelope. But not sure this would upset her, as she’s said she doesn’t want any money for it. Plus it’s not much in comparison to how much the event has cost…. But at the same time, I would probably not have acknowledged it if she was selling them full price.

Is a really naice expensive bottle of gin and chocs enough?

OP posts:
GlobalTravellerbutespeciallyBognor · 20/06/2026 16:00

sundaysurfing · 20/06/2026 15:20

I’d probably give her flowers and a £50 gift card. Most people say that they don’t want any money for it, but she has spent quite a bit on it so I would give her something back if I could afford it.

The above plus, and for me this would be a significant aspect, a handwritten card with some heartfelt sentiments about how kind she had been. She is a generous soul so she isn’t doing it to get something back but she does deserve something nice and some
lovely words of appreciation.

(That would be my approach.)

BeaLola · 20/06/2026 16:00

OP are you able to advise the type of event it is ? Concert or hotel stay so we can come up with something for you

Whyherewego · 20/06/2026 16:00

Depends on what it is. If you get her something that was thoughtful and unique that related to the event she may appreciate it. Kind of depends on what the event was.

OneLimePombear · 20/06/2026 21:31

I think this is the perfect occasion for some flowers and a thank you card.

MCF86 · 20/06/2026 21:36

I really hope the poster that was annoyed her concert ticket didn't go to waste reads this thread!

What a lovely this this person is doing OP, I agree it's so hard to know the best thing to give someone you don't know well though. What if she's a teetoal vegan with hay fever 😱

MidsummerMoment · 20/06/2026 22:45

Is there a charity she supports? If she won't accept anything herself, could you ask her if you could donate to that organisation as a thank you?

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