Recently living alone with three children and feeling very overwhelmed

[Verytiredmum2026]

So I recently moved out on my own with ny 3 children 11 5 4 the youngest two are both additional needs and I left there dad we were together 12 years but cut a long story he cheated multiple times and I kept going back until enough was enough. However this is the first time since 2012 I have lived on my own with no one to talk to apart from ny kids. I suffer with depression and anxiety already but doing this fully on my own no help no support ive never felt worse. I've got no one to reach out to no one to come round I honestly dont know what to do. Im up all night with ny boys and then work during the day come home repeat. Is it normal to feel this low this stressed this exhausted please tell me it gets better

Now there is some space between you as a couple - well ex-couple - can you work on a co-parenting relationship? He is still their dad and should be the one you call for support or at least he needs to see them at least every other weekend.

We are still good friends however he won't come and help he will have the kids for an hour or two on his days off but only at my house I can't ring or message him as I get sorry im busy he games alot and spends alot of time on his computer he never helped during the relationship never did a night feed just worked and gamed so im used it it sadly

Time to tell him he can no longer come in to the house, he needs to take the kids out. Have you gone to CSA? That might change his mind!

Truthfully he won't pay he never has when we were together birthdays christmas uniforms anything kids wise I hace always paid for and his dad doesn't give one either so its literally just me and the kids

And you are good friends with this useless piece of shit?!

I hope you have made a claim with CMS? and then collect and pay.
Stop being friends with him and only let him see the kids out of your house and for more than an hour at a time.
Contact your GP they do something called social prescribing which might help. Get help anywhere you can. Can you take some time off work?

I mean I tolerate him for the kids but feel nothing towards him and numb to anything he does anymore I thought that was pretty good 🤣

I’d be absolutely livid with him if I were you. He’s such a crap father to those kids. I’m sorry you are in this position 💐

You absolutely need to go to the Child Maintenance Service as soon as possible and he needs to start paying for his own kids. And why won’t he have his kids at his place? Gaming is a pathetic excuse!

His excuse is he doesn't have anything there for them which yeh is true but he has his own money i wasn't leaving stuff that I bought the kids with him when I paid for it so I took it with me

Since this is a recent change for you op, I'm sure you feel overwhelmed.
Being the sole carer your DCs, I think things could very well get better for you as you adjust and make some changes.

If you can follow the advice of PPS that might help.
You're depressed and anxious, are you on medication for that?
Have you spoken with your GP about this?
Pehaps they have something they can suggest for anxiety and depression.

You say you're up all night with your boys, they are the ones with special needs?
Has the GP any advice for you to help you not be up all night with them?

Everyone knows that's a bad thing being up all night and going to work the next day, no wonder you feel as you do.
It's never nice not to have the support of family and friends and to feel overwhelmed because of that.
If you can get things sorted with your DP which honestly it sounds like a long shot as he doesn't sound useful at all.
But if you could get that sorted and you could get your health talked about and managed with the help of the GP I think things will get better for you going forward.
You can always come on to MN for a chat, just expressing yourself to other people can be helpful.
Try to take some of the advice that's been suggested on here OP, hoping things will soon be better with you.