Returning to work with a 13-month-old still feeding at night

[thepurgebegins]

I'm due to return to work when my second baby is 13 months old, and I'm feeling much more anxious this time around because he's still feeding frequently at night. I know that could change over the next few months, and I'm trying to encourage more daytime bottles, but it's playing on my mind.

I currently work part-time, two days a week, starting at 7am. I've been allowed to avoid night shifts for the first two months back, and my team leader suggested using some annual leave to ease back in. My options are either:

Work one day a week for a while, with my husband handling the morning wake-ups and feeds.

Work both days but start later (around 10am), so I can get a bit more sleep and do the morning feed before leaving.

This would only be for around two months. Financially, either option is fine. My first child stopped night feeds by 12 months, so I didn't face this dilemma before. My second is much more attached, and I feel guilty pushing him to wean before he's ready, but I also know I have a deadline before night shifts resume.

What would you do? Thankyou from one very confused and emotional mama

Both of mine woke up frequently for feeds for a long time. First child I was full time teacher, second child part time. I just went to work on very little sleep and got through it. My dd is 2 1/2 now and sometimes sleeps through, but usually wakes up and gets put in our bed at some point. You do just adapt and cope. Or go for sleep training / night weaning, but that’s a personal decision. I think the difference is night shifts as that must make it really tough. You’ll need to work out a system with your DP as it shouldn’t all be on you.

I think you either carry on as you are (and be exhausted). Or you will need to sleep train and make sure all the milk and food is consumed in the day.

From one year old babies/toddlers can get all their calories and nutrients from solid food in the day. So the night waking is purely a habit/ for comfort.

I would encourage more food in the day and cut out the bottles. I thought the advice was to cut bottles from 12
months? If a 13 month old is waking for lots of feeds in the night this will be affecting his appetite in the day. It’s a vicious cycle.

Mine were still waking 1-3 times a night until they were probably 3-4. I don’t think it really matters. You’ll likely still be up parenting in the night even if you night wean. Your Dh can offer a cup of milk. It didn’t make much difference with sleep. For what it’s worth, mine are well past the waking at night stage now and I still have to wake for about 30 minutes a night to eat and take medicine in the middle of the night. You just get on with it. I used to do night wakings and still have to get up at 5:30 for a long London commute.

I work 12 hour shifts staring at 7, I just dealt with it. Went to work tired.

One of mine now has long term medical needs so I can be up in the night now dealing with that and still have to go to work as a nurse plus do night shifts. I’m permanently tired.

You might have to wean, especially as you’re going to be working nights and yes get DH involved.