Man at Morrisons questioned my shopping and told me to cheer up

[FelicityShagsWell]

I just bought a few things in Morrisons and the gate wouldn't let me out. I asked the bloke behind me if he knew if there was a problem and he said you need to tap your receipt. Fair enough, I didn't know that. But while I was looking for it he said he didn't believe I'd paid for my purchases. When I looked puzzled I was told to cheer up.

Do men in 2026 still say that! I thought it was left behind on 1970s building sites.

Those gates can be tricky and you don’t need a member of staff to tell you to be cheerful especially if he thought you hadn’t paid :(
He was probably trying to be funny and not in a good way.

🙄

Just ignore and move on. People say things. He wasn't directly offensive and he did help you escape from the supermarket.

He was just making a flippant comment. It's really not that serious.

He was a customer, not a staff member.

Oh, thought it was a staff member! ..

You had an encounter with a common or garden Neanderthal, sadly far from extinct. There’s quite a lengthy recent thread on this particular species and how to handle the rage induced by their stupendous sense of entitlement and high levels of fuckwittedness. Best ignored, although my go-to response is a simple “thanks for your input”. If I can muster a pitying smile, so much the better.

Cunts will cunt unfortunately

Mumsnet at its finest.

He did his best, at least he didn’t say ‘ love you, bye’ .

You're missing the point, aren't you?

What does this mean?

He did explain what you to do, but had to then spoilt it with a bad joke that you didn't laugh at, not worth worrying about.

I’ve already had it a couple of times this year, once about my shopping (I was looking glum about to travel home to recently disabled young adult daughter) and once waiting for a train (heading to airport for a funeral). In both cases, I glared and asked why I needed to given what I was thinking about at that time. In both cases, I got the “I was only sayin’…” type response of a chauvinist being caught out…and not the response of “sorry for your troubles”, so I knew it was about them not me.

This doesn't sound a bit like a 1970s builders type situation because there is context to him telling you to cheer up.

Maybe he thought you were rude/miserable after he helped you.

Oh god no! Was there a point?!

I have a bot of a grumpy resting face and got that comment a lot until my mid thirties. I practised "what for" and a hard Paddington stare, walking swiftly on.

Honestly just shrug it off! Life's too short to get annoyed about such tiny problems.
The sun's out, enjoy your day and move on

I would say that based on your experience that yes, some men do still tell women to “cheer up” apropos of nothing in 2026.

It was also an odd response from him when he essentially accused you of shoplifting to which he reasonably ought to have expected a less than thrilled response.

After making a bold and rude assumption joke that I'd not paid he tried to minimise it by telling me to cheer up when I probably looked completely puzzled. That's what I thought.

I find this helps, OP.

It's just a phatic comment. You didn't know the receipt had to be swiped to prove you'd paid and could legitimately be allowed to leave. While you looked for it, he joked you mustn't have actually paid. People quip all the time about something must be free if the barcode won't scan. Or must have been about to tell a lie if you can't remember what you were going to say.

You were holding him up with something quite simple and obvious and he was relatively pleasant about it. If I'd been behind you, I'd have been annoyed you didn't have the receipt ready and would have wondered why you were asking me if I knew if there was problem with the barrier rather than thinking it was with you.

Sounds like he was trying to make small talk whilst you blocked his exit and faffed about trying to find your receipt!

God they're annoying aren't they? Put you down if you don't simper at a "joke" putting you down.

I never have the right response, as I am too reserved (slow and/or cowardly). I would love to give them a proper lecture on being a twat, but it'll never happen...sigh!

Sounds to me he made a joke about about the robbing after he explained about how to get out and you must have looked angry, the robbing comment was funny, the cheer up one wasn't