Do brothers and sisters usually argue more than same sex siblings?

[PollyPeep]

Inspired by a few threads I've seen recently, and real life experiences, I'm just interested in sibling dynamics. People who have a girl and a boy, do you find they spent a lot of time fighting and arguing? People with two of the same sex, do they also spend most of their time fighting or do they get on better? We have two boys (4 and 7) who get on really well, independently play together for long periods of time and, aside from occasional hitting or shouting, don't really fight. They share the same toys and interests, and I would say they are really good friends.

Stories I've seen online and from friends who have a boy and a girl suggest that they fight a lot more and just generally don't get on. I grew up with a brother and we fought a normal amount but just didn't have that much in common. Different interests, friends and toys right from the start. There's a lot of love there of course, but not that much common ground for much of our childhood.

Would you say this holds up for you?

Mine are teens now, but the only thing they've ever fought over is who's slacking on chores. They rarely cross paths otherwise.
As very little kids, ds was never really interested in dd, who adored him, so she learned to do her own thing. They are very, very different people.

I was v close to my sister, but we also fought like hell.

I'm one of 4, DH is one of 3, we have 3DC. All mixed sex. It mainly depends on personality but also partly on sex. As a broad generalisation girls communicate more so two girls will fight more than 2 boys (who are more likely to sulk at each other) but also be thick as thieves. Usually within a few minutes.

I have two of each, and it was entirely personality dependent.
DD1 (eldest) liked to torment DS1 who was sensitive and cried easily (told him his yr 3 teacher was a witch, and spent the whole summer before making him scared of her... took us a while to work that out!) But generally they all got on well and were very protective of each other.
DD2 was always the peacemaker.. a calm and wise child, DS1 was the livewire and DS2 has special needs but was adored and protected by all.
They had their moments of course but the older three are only a year apart each so grew up playing together very well.
The girls shared a room (as did the boys) and there were a few arguments over clothes as teens but never actual fights.
They are all very close as adults, even though geographically miles apart!

I had a brother but never really fell out with him, maybe when he gave me all the crap parts in his plays and I got annoyed. But we have very separate/ different lives now and rarely see each other or speak.

I have two boys 10 and 8 and they're lot more volatile with each other than I ever was with my brother. The older one winds the younger one up, but often it is mutually caused. They don't hit each other or owt, but do fall out and get upset. I think it is personality more than sex tbh.

Edited to add they do play well together as well sometimes, it's not all fighting. Be interesting to see what happens when the oldest goes to secondary.

I wouldn’t think so. I think they stay out of each other’s way and have different friend groups. But I think their ages probably matter a lot.

I have a boy and a girl, 5 year gap, and they do fight, but mostly because one is quite hot headed and opinionated. But they have very different social circles and interests.

Dh and BIL are 3 years apart and fought viciously as children. Dh has a scar where BIL attacked him with a machete at one point. 😂 They were much closer and age and while they didn’t have overlapping friend groups, I think they were close enough that there was a lot of fighting.

Ours are primary aged. DD youngest, just under 3 years between them.

Get on very well, into the same types of games etc, play together all the time at home. I'd say they get on 90% of the time, but arguments can just come out of nowhere, pretty much daily. DS is more chilled out than DD

I hope they remain close as the years go by, but I think a lot will change in the teen years. Hopefully they'll come full circle & enjoy eachothers company as adults as we only have a tiny family.

My 4 3 girls and a boy only 5 years between oldest and youngest they have always got on. Maybe if there is a bigger age gap they annoy each other.

Two boys two years apart here and they never bickered but there was a lot of play fighting. Mainly thick as theives and played together right up to teenage years. I think age gap as well as sex makes a difference.
Friends with bigger gaps or boy / girl seemed to get more fighting or less playing together.

My girl/boy kids got along great at 4/7 and much less so now at 10/13. They’re growing up as very different people and that gets more obvious the older they get. I know plenty of combinations and there isn’t really a rule for it from what I can see.

I have one of each. They never argued, were always very close and still are. Their relationship has only grown with the years.

No. It's based on personality rather than sex.

I have two of each and they didn't fall out much. 3 are close together in age and the girls occasionally banded together against their brother, but he's a peaceable sort and cheerfully gave way to them. He and his older sister got on really well - its the younger one who is bossy.

Mine are same sex and fight constantly. So no, doesn’t hold true for me.

like pp said it’s personality. Mine are very different, being the same sex does not mean they have the same likes, same hobbies, same toys.

My two DDs are young adults now. They're 25months apart. Once they got past the toddler stage they were always fighting and disagreeing. When they were older primary age I almost lost the will to live. Mostly arguing, nothing physical. Now, as young 20-somethings, they mostly get on lovely, but still there's the underlying ability to be horrible to each other. I agree with others, it's personality driven.

My youngest argues the most with his older brother and sister. Not excessively but when they were all a bit younger he would wind them up, less so now theyre all teens. The older 2 rarely argue, people comment on how close they all are tbh, though when they do argue its about using each other's hair stuff, and who ate all the snacks!

My brother and I got on really well and played a lot together. I have really good memories when I grew up. My best friend and her brother didn´t get on.
Two boyfriends of mine really really really did not get on with their brothers. It is a personality thing, not a sex thing.

My dad and his siblings(those left) are in their 70s and 80s. Get them together and you can see what they were like as kids; the wind up merchant; the peacemaker; the anxious one; the scrapper....

I have two boys. They are 3 and 5 and spend 50% of their lives fighting and 50% being best friends. It's all or nothing with them.

I don't recognise anything about girls being more dramatic or emotional... you'd think mine were in a soap opera with the theatrics. Today I've had "I thought he was my very best friend but he won't read Superworm with me. I'm never being his friend again EVER!" Followed by hysterical tears, obviously. Then comes the tearful reconciliation 🤷‍♀️ (they are bloody adorable together the other 50% of the time though!).

Me and Dsis were similar, apparently. DH didn't fight much with his sister growing up but there was a much bigger age gap which probably helped.

I’ve got two boys almost exactly 3 years apart at 9 and 12 and I’d say they definitely play more together than fight.

They only fight (bicker, rarely physical) when they’re hungry, tired or showing off in front of respective friends but they have the same friendship group outside of school which helps. They play footy together and out on their bikes even though one is at high school now it’s not really changed much (apart from DS1 teaching DS2 more ‘colourful’ language).

I’d love to think they’ll be close all their lives. They are fiercely protective of each other though and have exactly the same sense of humour.

In my personal experience, sisters argue the most, at least more than a brother/sister set up. My older sister and I were vile to each other. My 2 oldest are a girl then a boy and although they fall out I can’t remember them being really awful to each other. Whereas my sister broke more than one of my bones in our childhood when beating me up, and I vividly remember screaming at her to “go fuck yourself coz no one else would want to fuck you!” When I was about 13 which was probably quite painful too.

I’ve seen and heard of plenty of other sisters I know being equally bad or even more psychotic worse Less so with brothers although I know of more than 1 brother who went off with his brother’s girlfriend or wife.