Page 9 | Quirks from a poorer childhood that have followed you through life.

Motorwayview · 2026-05-21T07:23:03+00:00

Inspired by the tight people thread. No matter how much underwear I have I am always slightly panicked that I'll run out of clean underwear so have been known to handwash and leave overnight to dry. Ive got draws and draws of the stuff now - BUT growing up for a while I had just enough to get by on but only if DM washed them every night. ( 3 pairs knickers) Sometimes we didn't have the 50p for the meter to use the emersion heater or boil a kettle (this was the '70's). The one that drives DH mad is that I have to use every last drop out of a bottle even if Ive got 3 more of the same in the cupboard ( shampoo ect) . Anyone else ?

AlexaAdventuress · 21/05/2026 15:11

I use every last scrap of soap if I can. After not having a car for several years and then getting one I found myself doing the same thing as my parents used to do - putting a tiny amount of fuel in it and running it 'til it was empty. It took me some time to realise that as an adult with debit cards I can keep it filled up and not have that 'running out of petrol' anxiety at all. There are some things I splurge on now because I can afford to. From once only having a pair of school shoes and occasionally a pair of wellies, I now have shelves full of them, many of them somewhat frivolous and not the sort of thing you could wear on a long hike. Although i've tried!

OhThePotential · 21/05/2026 15:15

CaptainBeefheartspal · 21/05/2026 10:34

Ooh yes, I remember the immersion heater and having to share baths to preserve the hot water.
Also had all hand me down clothes including underwear and sometimes had to use safety pins to keep my knickers up.

We were free school meal pupils and in the 70’s we had to stand in a separate queue to get get our lunch tickets. It was shameful looking back. I always make sure dc have enough money for food even if we’re a bit short ourselves.

At my school the free school meal tickets were red and the ones paid for by parents were green.

Which is why I went home for lunch (tinned soup / beans on toast) or if plans dictated staying at school I took a ham sandwich and a packet of crisps - we would have been eligible for me to have free school meals but my Dad was working and my Mum didn’t want me to have the shame of the ‘red tickets’ or my Dad to have the shame of not being able to provide food for his family.

She went without a lot so I could eat better food. Bless you mum.

BlackeyedSusan · 21/05/2026 15:24

Mischance · 21/05/2026 08:56

"Waste not, want not" was the family motto throughout my childhood.

I eat stuff that is out of date as I cannot bear to throw it away. My AC often arrive and do a sweep of my fridge and chuck stuff out. And I have stuff in my larder which is years out of "best before" date.

In my fridge at this moment is a small amount of cooked char-grilled chicken that came with my supermarket order. I ate half of it but really don't like it and do not want to eat it. I will leave it there till it is really out of date so I can justify throwing it out! Oh dear .......

Me too.

LupaMoonhowl · 21/05/2026 15:29

Really interesting thread!
My parents were very poor growing up (born in 1940) but managed to buy a house in a lower middle class area when I was 6.
Dad worked in a factory - paid on Thursdays so we never had eg bacon on a Thursday as money had run out.
But in the 70s wasn’t really noticeable - no-one had designer clothes or fancy holidays so no envy.

I am now very wealthy but no interest in fancy things - clothes from Asda and Primark get me compliments. I prioritise my mental health so use my money to buy me time and convenience. Nothing saved for ‘best’ -just use it!

Feis123 · 21/05/2026 15:31

NameChangeScot · 21/05/2026 09:08

I do the save for best things too, I've a box full of the 'nice' toiletries and skincare that barely get used. But I read an article about an older woman who died, she'd lived quite simply, and her house was filled with lovely things she was keeping for best. Best never came.

Burn the candle, wear the dress, use the bubble bath - you don't know what's around the corner.

I do agree with you so much! I think about it all the time - I used to save the best things too, but after a friend made me a charity shop fan - (before her I never went, thought it was embarrassing, weird I know - my rich friends always went charity-shopping, I wanted to distance myself from any form of 'charity' and never went, but now I am charity-shop mad) I saw the amazing things people 'saved for best' which their offspring donated to charity after they passed - I could not believe it - like Royal Derby china sets (!!!!) never used, mink fur coats never worn (!!!!!), etc. etc. do I don't save anything for best anymore, I use it all up, I wear it and force my family do the same.

Nogimachi · 21/05/2026 15:31

I go round the supermarket comparing prices like a hawk and often don’t buy things that feel too expensive. eg I will get the £1.70 British apples, never would I spend £3.30 on the Pink Lady apples because the others are half the price and just as good.

But also…I get my children’s hair cut regularly at a really good salon because we only had one haircut a year and I want them to look groomed

On the plus side I’ve always saved and have no problem budgeting, and rarely go shopping for fun since this wasn’t a thing in our house so I find it boring (we read books since library books were free.)

Result being I have saved about five times as much in pensions as my husband which will stand us in good stead. He grew up in a home with 5x the household income that we had and it does mean we have very different attitudes to spending.

VWT7 · 21/05/2026 15:35

Yes poor mining village with very little.
DM bought one Mars bar per week, it was sliced and shared between 3 of us over an entire afternoon.

At the seaside, definitely no toys or treats really.
Such that now I go in swimming pools on holiday and love secretly swimming with all the inflatable toys that parents have bought for their children - crocodiles, flamingo’s etc.
Literally just been swimming now alongside an inflatable dolphin
I’m 70 😬😊

Feis123 · 21/05/2026 15:36

Ottersideofthebridge · 21/05/2026 14:13

Also, I wanted my kids to have the things I couldn't have as a child and not to be the one who didn't always fit in (although my lovely Mum tried her best, we just didn't always have the money). But consequently my kids are less resilient and have more expectations, which isn't always a good thing.

How right you are about resilience. Same with mine.

LupaMoonhowl · 21/05/2026 15:41

VWT7 · 21/05/2026 15:35

Yes poor mining village with very little.
DM bought one Mars bar per week, it was sliced and shared between 3 of us over an entire afternoon.

At the seaside, definitely no toys or treats really.
Such that now I go in swimming pools on holiday and love secretly swimming with all the inflatable toys that parents have bought for their children - crocodiles, flamingo’s etc.
Literally just been swimming now alongside an inflatable dolphin
I’m 70 😬😊

I have today bought an inflatable swan on Amazon 😂

Feis123 · 21/05/2026 15:43

ExquisiteSocialSkills · 21/05/2026 12:07

I hate waste, I find food fights disgraceful. I also like nice hard scratchy old towels.

Yes, yes and yesss!!!!

wishingonastar101 · 21/05/2026 15:44

I hide my jewellery when we go on holiday as we always got burgled.... I could never read 'Burglar Bill' - terrifying.

DontKillSteve · 21/05/2026 15:44

Bundleflower · 21/05/2026 14:35

I had quite an affluent, although absolutely shit, childhood so nothing really of my own input. This thread has reminded me of a friend from my childhood who, having been raised without many basics, absolutely hoarded towels. There was stacks upon stacks of folded white fluffy towels in the bathroom. There must have been 30 or 40 towels for a family of 4. That always struck me as really sad. (That would have been bath towels - hand towels & flannels not included)

Edited

Poverty is so bloody grinding isn’t it? I remember those scratchy decades old worn towels, nothing matching. I have loads of new towels now from upmarket shops and clothes ‘for best’ unworn- while I’ll wear shoes and jumpers with holes in. I spend a great deal of money on stuff I’ll not wear or use. The psychology is so odd. I have been inspired to chuck out my old towels so that I’m forced to use new ones. I’ll feel more comfortable keeping back one unused set though, ‘for best’ 😁

TFImBackIn · 21/05/2026 15:45

TheyGrewUp · 21/05/2026 09:28

DH has funny habits left over from childhood. He likes things bought in small sizes and argues it is more economical because it means you use less by ekeing them out. He never quite fills a petrol tank because he likes to stop at a round figure (the car cost over £100k), at service stations he always breaks away from us and buys himself a cheap Greggs and sausage roll, whilst giving me £20 or £50. And the saving for best - he never opens new shirts, pants, or puts a new coat on until the old is beyond redemption, oh and has been known to knot a broken shoelace!

He is now worth millions, the above are foibles and he is generous with everyone else.

That's incredibly sad. Your poor husband.

wishingonastar101 · 21/05/2026 15:45

Oh and one DP hates because he has a flashy car - long car journey we take blankets to keep warm. He tells me the car has heating but I don't trust that we won't all freeze to death.

godmum56 · 21/05/2026 15:51

Whyamiherenow · 21/05/2026 14:03

Not me but my mil. She has an obsession with saving energy and water etc. she does the following:

if she runs tap water to get it hot for dish washing (it’s usually cold / tepid to start), she runs it in to a jug then uses that water for drinking or the kettle;

if she boils in the kettle more water than she needs (by accident), she puts the hot water in a flask to use later;

she turns the shower on to get her body wet, turns it off again to apply shower gel / shampoo then turns the shower back on for a rinse (have asked her not to make teenage dsd do this when she stays);

she doesn’t have a tumble and gets her clothes dry naturally all year round, apparently if the clothes freeze on the line and you knock the ice out then they are dry quickly;

her biggest thing is she eats her dinner at my house a minimum of 3 times a week, at her step daughter’s house once a week and my auntie’s house once a week then tells me how little she spends on food (find this one a little annoying);

she is a lovely woman and a legend at minimising her outgoings. She also goes on holiday most months so she does use her money for fun and I don’t begrudge her.

I do the shower thing otherwise I find that the stream from the shower washes off the shampoo or shower gel.

DontKillSteve · 21/05/2026 15:52

My daughter will buy something and put it on immediately. Doesn’t need to wait for an ‘event’ and never saves anything ‘for best’. This makes me happy. I cannot do this for myself. I have unworn clothes, unused towels and a whole cupboard of high end candles.

godmum56 · 21/05/2026 15:53

wishingonastar101 · 21/05/2026 15:45

Oh and one DP hates because he has a flashy car - long car journey we take blankets to keep warm. He tells me the car has heating but I don't trust that we won't all freeze to death.

I have always got warm coats in the car, one for me and one for a passenger. Car heating is fine and dandy till the car breaks down.

MissMarplesGoddaughter · 21/05/2026 15:56

CaptainBeefheartspal · 21/05/2026 10:34

Ooh yes, I remember the immersion heater and having to share baths to preserve the hot water.
Also had all hand me down clothes including underwear and sometimes had to use safety pins to keep my knickers up.

We were free school meal pupils and in the 70’s we had to stand in a separate queue to get get our lunch tickets. It was shameful looking back. I always make sure dc have enough money for food even if we’re a bit short ourselves.

At DH’s school children having FSM stood in a separate queue and ate sitting at separate tables too. Just awful. DH also had free meals at school during the holidays, it was often his only meal of the day.

godmum56 · 21/05/2026 16:02

WillowTea · 21/05/2026 14:13

I have a hard time with this. I will give things worth less than £10 to a charity shop or friends/freecycle. If something is realistically worth more than £10, I keep it for the same reason. A person with a healthy attitude would sell it now and put the money in the bank. I am trying to be more like that but it is very difficult.

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I stopped selling things unless they are worth a lot more than a tenner. By the time you have paid postage and bought packaging (even if you use recycled, there is still stuff like sellotape) and driven to the post office, it wasn't worth my time. I started putting things on my local facebook giveaway group and the joy that has given me is worth more than the few quid I would have made by selling.

TheChiffchaff · 21/05/2026 16:07

So much of this. We were properly poor when I grew up, never hungry but certainly no money for birthday presents.
I'm 68 now and very comfortably off but lifelong habits of frugality stick.
I tend to mix frugality with extravagance. So while I might stay in an expensive five star hotel I will take a packed lunch for the journey.
DH had a similar background and also has similar attitude to money now. Happy to pay £££ for a meal out but hates wasted food at home.
When we had children I felt a bit panicked at losing my income and gaining the cost of children. I still worked part time but it all went on nursery fees. Actually I didn't need to be because we were fine but memories of my childhood made me worry.
I tried to get the balance right with the DC. They weren't spoilt all year round but got expensive birthday treats. They are now adults and both have very similar attitude to money to me.

I do try to remember to wear / use the good stuff but I've learned that expensive clothes don't really interest me whereas fancy hotels do!

godmum56 · 21/05/2026 16:07

Regarding wearing other people's clothes, because of the age and shape gap between me and my sibs, we never had hand me downs and my Mum made most of our clothes apart from coats. Outgrown clothes and shoes were passed to the local church and thence to families who needed them. I was taught from a very early age NEVER to comment if I saw a child wearing something that had been mine. we were nowhere near comfortably off but better off than some!

MerelyPlaying · 21/05/2026 16:38

Where were you all when I was at school? I always felt as if I was the only child who didn’t have new clothes, didn’t go on school trips, couldn’t afford to go and spend at the local shops. I opted not to do home economics for O level because my mum would’ve had to buy all the ingredients. It felt very lonely.

Old habits die hard, I am now very happy to buy my clothes from charity shops, use leftovers, etc because I think it’s better for the planet. I’ve just about managed to overcome the hoarding and ‘keeping for best’. I don’t have children, but I often buy things for my friend’s kids because I can’t bear the thought of them missing out like we did.

SurferRona · 21/05/2026 16:39

Branded period products. Lots, and lots of variations for different flows too.

I was given a box of vespre for first period (well, the first I told mum about). Vespre was ultra thin as they had that liquid turn to gel stuff nappies have, there were not many on the market which did that. But more expensive. After that one, it was a drive to the cheapest product- the own brand and cheapest thick towels which hurt the top of my thighs when it rubbed as I walked to school and back- the towel was always the thickest super super pad so I wouldn’t use as many and it would bunch in my pants through the day. Horrid. But I knew I shouldn’t ask for better, more expensive. When my younger female cousin started a period during a visit I remember urgently insisting to mum to get vespre for her so she wouldn’t suffer as I did. She never asked why I was so insistent but I think she knew ☹️. Working class, both parents worked manual type jobs, but we weren’t hard hard up I don’t think. Bills were always paid, always food in. And Mum smoked. I wish there were period pants back then, on light days at the end of period as my legs had been rubbed for a few days by then, I would wear the big navy blue gym knickers with cotton or toilet paper placed into the gusset, then remove and hand wash the knickers. A period pant pre-cursor 😆. I should have gone into production, could have been Michelle mone 😂

OhThePotential · 21/05/2026 16:44

YoBetty · 21/05/2026 11:14

My mum (late teens when war broke out) did the same with wrapping paper, and also doing the thing with sheets. She also had a 'thing' about cutting toenails short, so they didn't wear the sheets out! Once the sheets had really had it and were irreparable, she'd cut them up into squares and use them as cloths, or for dad to use as hankies and/or polishing the chromework on the car.

I still have her button box, and her needlework basket. There's stuff in there that hasn't been touched since the 1950's. When I need some mid-grey bias binding or have some green socks to darn, the supplies are ready and waiting.

I grew up hearing make do and mend, save it for a rainy day, a stitch in time saves nine, look after the pennies and the pounds will look after themselves, waste not want not, enough is as good as a feast.

Do I save jars, tins, boxes, wrapping paper, tissue paper, ribbons, bows, bubble wrap and gift bags? You bet I do. We cut up old envelopes to use for shopping lists. And I can hear DM's voice in my head when I go round the house switching off lights to 'save the juice'.😁

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My mum was the same - 14 when war broke out.

I wish I had a sewing box as I’m now a professional dressmaker and would love to think I got it from her, but she never sewed or knitted a stitch after I was born (even though she was good at both) in 1970 as she had made everything including nappies and cloth handkerchiefs for my older sisters in the 1950’s and was so glad to be able to buy ready made kids clothes for me.

Youthinkyourefunny · 21/05/2026 16:46

I got a duvet (or continental quilt as they were called here in UK) for my birthday in 1976. I was 11. It was so exciting as my ‘posh’ friends next door had them. My mum was all up for it as I could then easily make my bed myself.. and she didn’t have to boil blankets .. it was a game changer in our family as my dad was very poorly and incontinent - so mum was forever boiling sheets and blankets ..

Waking up on a winter morning - ice inside the windows and running to the Aga wrapped in my duvet to get dressed and scorching my upper thighs which went all itchy with heat rash - but my arse was blue with cold ..