iPads for kids - what age?

[JustAMum90]

DC is 5 and will be starting primary school in August. They have mentioned tablets a few times and how it’s “weird” that all their friends have tablets and they don’t. I’ve always just brushed it off with the old “every family has different rules” and it’s been brought up for a few days then not mentioned again for weeks or months.

DH thinks we should be buying one for DC this summer ahead of starting school as he doesn’t want them being left out and he believes that DC will be at a disadvantage when tables/computers are introduced at school as other kids will be confident using them and DC won’t.

I just don’t think a tablet is necessary at this age at all! 🫠 am I being ridiculous? I was hoping we wouldn’t be entertaining the idea of anything like that for years yet 😳🤣

I have an iPad and we have a few problem solving games on it that DC and I occasionally sit and play together (maybe 15/20 mins 2x a week at most - and sometimes none at all for weeks on end) and sometimes DC will ask about something and I’ll get the iPad out and we’ll research it together.

We have no other kids in the family and all our friends have kids younger than ours so I have nobody to ask 🫠🤣

If your DC have iPads - what age did you introduce then?
And is there an age where they actually become useful for school etc?

Year 1 was when we started to have digital homework and I was surprised it was so early. It could have easily been done on a phone but we got a tablet 'for the family' as I was WFH when homework needed doing so couldn't really give my phone.

Basically used for homework, once a week when sibling is swimming for 30mins and they have to wait and for travelling. Long trips away etc not just 45 mins.

if you already have a tablet in the house, I would start just using that. They don't need to have their own devices, just make sure they have their own accounts with protections and to stop them messing up your algorithm

My eldest is 4 and finishing Reception soon..she doesn't have an iPad and it's not disadvantaged her at all. It might differ from school to school, but hers doesn't seem to require one for homework etc. I don't plan to introduce one until actually necessary and mine definitely doesn't need one. She can watch TV so I'm not anti screen, but there just wouldn't be any particular benefits right now that I can see.

If there are no other kids in the family, and all the friends have younger kids, who’s kids have the iPads?

i wouldn’t give my 5yo an iPad just to play games. About 6/7 she started doing a few maths puzzles.

I really hate that schools use them... but its is hard to avoid.

Personally my son is a tiny bit older than yours. He doesn't have one, but we have one as a family that is brought out for pretty much the same reasons as an earlier poster: occasional learning/school work, long distance travel, etc. He never uses it as part of his daily routine/normal play time.

I'm not 100% anti technology though. He does play games - he just does it on our family computer instead. For me that is just much easier to control, because like TV, it is a big thing that is fixed in one place and can't be moved. It can't be taken to a bedroom or the dinner table, and needs parents help to get ready/set up, and it isn't his, but all of ours. Those extra barriers just seem to keep it as something "occasional" in his mind, rather than something regular, which is what I could see him having his own tablet.

My daughter is Y1 we don’t have a tsblet and don’t plan on getting one until she needs it for school. She definitely hasn’t been disadvantaged compared to her peers especially when it comes to computing. The only time she has access to a tablet is when we go on an airplane and I download shows on to my Kindle Fire.

@justasmalltownmum DCs friends from nursery.
DC isn’t given the iPad to play games on. We sit down together occasionally to play a problem solving game.

@Clicheinaqashqai @Lottie6712 @lxn889121 @ThatJoyousScroller
Thank you ☺️👍🏻 This absolutely sounds more like my preferred plan. As I say, I have one anyway that can be used if it’s needed - I just don’t see how it would be beneficial to have their own.
We’re not anti-screen at all - DC watches tv and plays a few problem solving games with me occasionally. But I have tried hard to make sure it’s not an everyday thing and not something that DC wants all the time. The only tv we have is the one in the living room so usually if it’s on it’s because we’re sitting down to watch something together - it’s not on as background. And same with the tablet - it’s the occasional game together, and once for a family movie night while camping, rather than being a device that gets to go to the bedroom/table etc and have unlimited access to things.

I think we’ll just stick to the set up we have just now and wait to see when it may be beneficial in the future ☺️

I’d hold off as long as possible. Like you say, he can use yours occasionally. My kids are older, 21 and 18 so ipads weren’t as much of a thing, but DS1 didn’t have a laptop until 8, and phone at 11. DD was a bit younger, but I was lucky they were both very academic and managed their own screen time very well.

Nephew is 4, just turned and when he came to stay I was quite surprised that he doesn’t watch kids cartoons via normal TV, but was scrolling youtube kids and watching stuff like unwrapping toys, families out at the park. Mine watched a lot of cartoons at that age, so not judging the screen time, but mine were on cbeebies at that age, so educational and age appropriate. Nephew had also recently started playing a game on SIL’s phone and he was asking for it constantly. SIL was limiting the time on it, but he was crying, and hitting when she took it off him.

It made me realise how hard it is now with tech and young kids as it is addictive. So yes, hold off for as long as you can. DS can learn whatever age appropriate skills your DH thinks he needs at his age from occasional use of your ipad.

As old as possible. There’s more and more research coming out that kids learn better if they hand write stuff rather than use screens and Sweden has now removed devices from schools altogether.

It takes very little time to get up to speed with tablets so your LO will not be disadvantaged by delaying use. Plus they will have the advantages of better ability to focus, cope with being bored, interaction with others and a multitude of other benefits.

I’m a bit surprised this is your experience but I suppose every school and nursery is different. My DC is in reception and has never talked about other kids having tablets, I don’t think most of them do and if they did I’m not sure why they’d be talking about it (just doesn’t seem like a very normal thing for kids that age to talk about unless they’re using them all the time?!). We do actually have one that we’ve used for long journeys but it’s pretty infrequent and I’d say there’s no need to specifically get one at this age.

My kids are 10 and 11 and we have a family laptop that they use for homework (google classroom) and some recreation stuff like fantasy football league and chess. We monitor usage.

IPads can be used by a two year old so there is no way your child is falling behind by not having one.

DS starts high school next year and will get his own laptop as he will need to use it more and also a phone (with parental controls).

Surprised by some of the responses on here…we are in London, DC 8 and 5 and neither has a tablet or laptop. We have a battered old kindle that the 8yo used occasionally for times tables rockstars, but once he achieved the top level I stopped that. The 5yo has never used it.

Their homework is all on paper and they watch plenty of tv but always on the tv and monitored by us - no YouTube. They have never used our phones for games. They listen to audiobooks on yoto players for long car journeys.

I think this is fairly typical among their friends - a few have tablets but used rarely. Most parents seem to be like us and desperate to avoid the screens for as long as possible. They are addictive and ruin concentration and focus.

Tablets are really simple to use and they do get used at school so no way would a primary aged child be disadvantaged by not having one.

@Zanatdy Yeah I’m not anti-screen at all - mine definitely watches tv but would have no idea what YouTube was or anything 🫠 which I’m absolutely fine with to be honest!
DH was singled out at school and had a bit of a rough time (as did I to be honest) and I think he worries a bit too much about DC doing anything “different” incase they face similar.

@Icecreamisthebest I definitely feel this way! But at the same time don’t want to demonise them and just make it more desirable to DC in the future. I’d rather they grew up completely indifferent and just saw it as another tool to use!

@chocopuffs Oh, I don’t think for one second it’s actually a regular discussion at nursery 🤣 DC is like a dog with a bone when anything comes up at the moment - iPads…pets 🫠🤣
Keyworkers use an app to update us during the day so occasionally one will sit down with an iPad to do that. It’s more likely a case that this has happened and someone has said “I watch X on my tablet” and someone else has added “I play X on mine” etc. Then I hear about it for a couple of weeks from DC that “everyone has one!” and then not again for a while.
They may very well not even have their own - it may be family ones 🤷🏻‍♀️🤣

@Ohdearnotthisagain I definitely aim for this to be our approach too!

8/9 and even then limits limits limits! Sure a bit of screen time is fine/ good even but drawing, colouring, reading, imaginative play, building Lego etc etc etc etc is the way to go!!

ps I said this on another thread recently- my kids have always said ‘everyone has’- they totally don’t when you actually talk to the parents!!

I've got an almost 4 year old and he's got an Amazon fire kids tablet. I wouldn't have got him an I pad tablet but the kids fire one is good

@harrietm87 we also only use tv - no YouTube or anything.
We’re definitely in the minority though - even friends here who have younger children are very much “it gives me peace to get things done” or they get them whenever they’re out for meals or in the car etc.
Its not our choice but each to their own on that ☺️👍🏻
We also use Yoto player in the car on longer journeys - it’s fab!
Glad to hear that homework is all paper based for you. I’d definitely prefer that! We have the school induction in a couple of weeks and I plan to ask them about these things then! It’s a great school so DC will be going there anyway but I’d like to know their approach so we know what to expect!

My nearly 7yo has a kindle fire but only uses when she's on the toilet. She was born with a bowel condition so sitting on the toilet twice a day for an extended period of time (15 minutes each time) is our daily routine. Sometimes she wants her tablet, sometimes she does other things. She doesn't use it or ask for it outside of her toilet time. But some of her friends already seem to be playing various computer games on tablets and computerd that I won't let her play, thankfully she doesn't seen interested, roblox and Minecraft etc. All the boy's birthday cakes at this age seem to be computer game related. So it definitely seems to be a thing with some children.

Age 12 - my husband was just talking to me about this about how Steve Jobs said he would never give his kids an iPad because no studies have ever been done to say that they do not impact development and behaviour. It's pretty obvious that kids get an immediate dopamine hit from using them which can't be good.

My dc watch quite a bit of tv but they don't use the computer/tablet much. The younger ones (aged 11-15) share 1 tablet between 3 of them. I find its useful for times when we are at the hospital or church and they need to be quiet.

My DC are 9 and 13 and neither have their own iPad! We have one family iPad. When they were little, they used it to FaceTime call grandparents in another country and for watching downloaded videos on flights. Then maybe a few games as they got older. Now my 13 yo uses it independently to watch Netflix etc. 9 yo still doesn’t have unsupervised access to it.

If you are going to get one, do not tell the DD that it is her possession. That will lead to DC feeling you are taking away her possession whenever you don’t let her use it. Important that it belongs to the adults which she is allowed to use under whatever conditions you decide on.

Honestly, never. An iPad is a big smartphone. They don’t need one until the age when it would be appropriate to have a smartphone (secondary school). Ours never had one, but the only time they did use ours was for travel (so being able to watch downloaded shows on a plane or long train journey). Or on holiday when we just had some adult time to chat with family or friends but there wasn’t a tv.

Homework was largely paper based until secondary school and the few things that are online/on an app, we just do together on my phone.

No way would I be giving a 5 year old a tablet, i don't care what others are doing.

Based on what we are learning of the negative effects of too much screen time, with talk of banning screens for under 16s, I would be putting it off for as long as possible. I would have no problem with the odd half hour doing puzzle games together, but otherwise there are plenty of things to do to entertain and amuse young children.