Question for people with ADHD experience

[MyFocusIsAroundHereSomewhere]

Posting here rather than ND Mumsnetters for traffic (name changed for privacy)....

I'm late diagnosed, high functioning, masking ADHD - realised something wasn't right after what I now realised was ADHD burnout after high stress and Perimenopause stripped me of my masking ability.

Meds have been helping to a degree, knowing and being conscious of my triggers is helping more, but the last six weeks or so in particular, my executive function has taken an absolute nosedive to the point where I am now avoiding some absolutely crucial tasks.

I know what the consequences are of not doing them, I know when I eventually do them, I will feel immense relief, but I just can't get there!

My meds help me with focus, but not with the exec function side of things, so I am not focussing on the right things.

For those of you in a similar boat, what are your tips, tricks, suggestions for triggering the executive function needed for those crucial tasks?

Body doubling - get yourself into a support group online where you all agree to start a task at once! Online study groups eg on Discord are great for this.

I also really like Study with Me videos on YouTube. YMMV but this is what works for me.

Yep, body doubling is the only way I can get anything done.

What I find helpful is to remove decision-making as far as possible- either automate things or create a structure (such as a weekly plan) that means that I don't have to decide whether to do X or Y on any given day, I just do it.

Similarly, reminding myself that I don't actually have to feel motivated to do X in order to do X.

For household tasks, create false urgency- eg put a song on the stereo and challenge yourself to complete the task before it finishes. Body doubling is also good for this eg dubbii.

Try breaking down the task into small bits- you don't need to draft the dreaded report, you just need to create a document. Then you just need to set out your chapter headings. Then you just need to write one paragraph etc etc.

I'm in a very similar position re improved focus but terrible task initiation. Body doubling is helpful. I've also got a couple of friends who I can go to and say: "I'm struggling with this task. I'm promise you I'm going to do it at X time - could you check in / bully me / hold me accountable" to make sure I'm on it. The mix of personalities is helpful - a couple of friends have a very kind and gentle touch to their encouragement, but I've got one friend who knows exactly under my skin and sometimes just being furious and getting it done to spite him is the only motivation that works.

Can I ask what meds you're on / you've tried? I'm on methylphenidate, and wondering if I should move to lisdexamphetamine (if I switch the clinic I'm with won't let me go back, so really interested to see how anyone's found lisdex for task initiation)

Off to Google body doubling

Me too, why did I imagine a doppelganger when I heard this! 😂

Ironically - I'm getting stuff round the house done (well apart from changing the bed 😔) - but mostly because I'm doing it to avoid the tasks that I am supposed to be doing - which are actually really important financial jobs!

I'll have to give body doubling a go...I know it works for practical tasks, but does it work for tasks where people involved are doing something completely different?

I guess it would depend on the person? I just like having study with me videos on regardless of the type of desk work I’m doing. I have a little routine, hot drink, online buddies, YouTube on and away we go! (I like the background noise of someone writing or typing, no music etc)

I'm in a very similar situation to you op and the only way I can get anything done is if DH does it with me. I didn't used to be like this but hit burnout sometime near the beginning of 2023 and things haven't improved much since unfortunately.