Approaching 40 and feeling lost as the children need me less

[LD86]

I am approaching 40, my children are 20 and 15 and don’t need me really as much anymore! I’ve spent my whole life being a mum and now I don’t know what I like, what I enjoy, or sadly I feel like I’ve lost who I am.
I already go to the gym and have started Pilates at home, I do enjoy walking but can’t seem to find a local walking group near me, I read in the evenings.
i would love to make some new friends, I am sociable and get along with all ages and walks of life! Someone please give me some inspiration thanks

I started a different career at 42, OP.

At only 40 you’ve got a wonderful opportunity to find a new path for yourself. Many of us are a lot older when our kids are those ages!

as per the pp, think broadly then narrow it down rather than the other way around.

Agree with others, start a new career. What is your current job, can we suggest any sensible alternatives?
I changed careers completely at 42, best thing i ever did.

I am self employed and run a cleaning business, before this I worked in education for 9 years :) never really known what I want to work as to be honest. I was a mum at 19 so kind of lost my way with that as I was just focussed on being a good mum.

I’m 46 and feel exactly the same! So at least we’re not alone! When people or work colleagues etc ask me how old my kids are I say 22 and 18 - which theoretically means adults 😂 not kids!!

My youngest of four is 17 next week and I feel a bit this way, except I’m 50 now. My eldest is 28 this summer and I was just 21 when I had him so I’ve spent my whole adult life raising a family.

Hello, im sorry you’re feeling a bit lost. My experience is a bit different, as I had kids older (not entirely by choice), but I wanted to come on to say that I have quite a few friends at your stage or a bit further along as their youngest has left home, and they’re having the time of their lives. Various things friends are doing in case it gives inspiration - it is for me! - learning languages, travelling to far flung places, playing music gigs, attending gigs, taking up ceramics, doing physical challenges like the west highland way, retraining as a counsellor, working in a new career with young people and choirs - choirs seem very popular round here. I think it takes quite a lot of effort to find what is your thing again and you might not have the time to properly commit until your youngest is a bit older, but it’s a great time to start thinking about it. Exciting times! And, you have the benefit of being so young (relatively!) when you start your second adult life. Good luck!