What do you do with kids in the holidays when you work full time?

[AintNobodyHereButUsChickens]

I’m about to start work for the first time since being a parent. Two kids ages 7 and 14, and I’ve been a SAHM since going on maternity leave with my eldest. It’s always worked just fine for us but not anymore and I’ve frantically been trying to get a job since September. Finally got one if I want it but now I’m puzzled about what to do with the kids. Or at least the 7yr old anyway.

The eldest goes to school in a different county to the one we live in so her school holidays are often different to the youngest’s. For example, I had 3 weeks of Easter hols, 1 week with just the eldest, 1 week with both and 1 week with just the youngest.

Not really any family who can help unless my SIL doesn’t mind them hanging around all day while she WFH. DH is self employed so it costs £180 for every day he doesn’t work.

What does everyone else do?!

It’s been a while now, but back then DH and I would take a week off together, each have a week seperately, and the the rest a mix of holiday clubs and grandparents.

Because I’m the one who’s done 99% of the cooking for the last decade and a half and now he’s taking over. He’s perfectly capable of parenting but the time of day he gets home is when I’d be cooking so now he’s going to take over my role. Because my role at that particular time of day is cooking.

You have to plan ahead and use a mixture of paid leave by you, your husband taking days off, sending the youngest to holiday camps and asking friends/family to have them. If you are friends with any of your youngest classmates parents you can arrange to trade some days so you have their kid over one day and they return the favour.

For the 6-week summer holidays this year we're doing 2 weeks holiday club, 2 weeks AL for me, 1 week AL for DH, and 1 week with grandparents. I try to mix it up (so a week club then week AL then club again or grandparents etc.)

We have family holidays booked, and holiday clubs. By age 7 dd was mainly doing more specialist holiday clubs tied to her interests (dance, drama, gymnastics) than generic ones in a school. It kept it more interesting for her.

I never used family or did childcare swaps. They would have just spent most of the day watching TV at PILs, and on my days off I preferred to spend time doing fun things with just my dcs, without having to do free childminding for someone else's child as well.

Dh and I took off 1-2 days per week each, plus 2-3 days of holiday club. This is from when ours were little though. A 14 year old would just be staying home on their own with one of us checking in a few times a day. Both our jobs shut down between Christmas and New Year, which is a time when there is usually no childcare, but we’re both always usually home for 2 weeks anyway.

It’s not difficult at all with a partner who shares the load. 13 weeks a year to cover. I take 1 day off each, still leave me with 15 days left of AL. We use a bit of that for a family holiday. I still have days left for a solo holiday every year and I tend to carry about 5 days over. Holiday club is £25 a day, which is well under my daily rate, same for Dh, so very worth it. Happy to pay £25 to make £200 between us a few days a year.

At 7 I paid for dd to be in summer clubs and arranged childcare swaps with friends. At 14 dd sorts herself while I work.

14yo is fine. Can they both go and stay with grandparents for a few days or a week? Then take some leave each, and holiday programs or pay a 20 year old to look after them

You and DH need to plan your annual leave with military precision.
Holiday clubs, booked way ahead
Friends
Family
Childminder

Can you wfh at all?

This is the first summer I'm dealing with this. Didn't work when DD was little and last summer DS was still able to go back to his old nursery for the summer but he's aged out of it now at 8. I'm taking a weeks annual leave, DS will be at scout camp for half a week, still 4 weeks with nothing (nearly 10 week summer holidays here). DD was going to look after him but she's got a summer job for two of those weeks and confirmation camp for another so only one week she can do. There's no childcare at all for his age where I am so it'll have to be a mix of grandparents (could send him to grandma's for a few days but he wouldn't like to be away from me longer than that) and staying home alone part of the day (depending how busy OH is at work, he might be able to spend more time at home so DS might not even need to be alone)

No neither of us can wfh. DH is self employed as a builder and I will be sorting and packing chicken parts at the local chicken factory 🫠

Your husband needs to be earning enough to take some time off to look after his children. If he can’t take time off then his business is not viable. I say that as a self employed person.

I hope you manage to get something sorted!

We do the same. We split our annual leave but try to take at least a week off together and have Christmas together. We also do the same with saving for it monthly so we don't have to find the money in Summer for holiday clubs which is expensive for two kids.

Is it not normal now for a 14 year old to look after a younger sibling? I’m just puzzled as that’s what I assumed would happen but nobody else has even mentioned it! Certainly when I was 14 my parents weren’t paying for childcare for my 4 year old sister, I was just looking after her but maybe that’s not normal now?

Sure, but its a bit much for him/her to spend literally all their school holidays looking after a demanding small child.

You’ve been a SAHM so hopefully have a group of mum friends that you can do some swaps with.

I went back to work but still had school holidays off so would take friends’ DC for chunks of the holidays.

Primary school had wraparound care and a holiday club which most people used, however it closed for 2 weeks in the summer hols so I was very popular then!

You might be able to offer to take friends’ DC over a weekend in exchange for some time in the holidays.

Unpaid parental leave if you are really stuck