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Original poster

How long would you give this person before giving the stuff away?

26 replies

kittykatlover · 05/05/2026 13:22

Doing a big clearout and listed a load of different baby stuff on Freecycle. A person “reserved” a bundle of baby clothes last week (Mon 27/4) and asked to come by tomorrow to collect, to which I’ve agreed.

I texted this person this morning at 9am to reconfirm. As yet no response.

In the meantime another person has messaged saying they want to take the lot today as well as about 6 other items I’ve got listed. this would be great as I could get rid of the lot in one go!

I’ve texted person A again this lunchtime asking them to confirm tomorrow. How long should I give them before giving everything to person B?

Also I gave person A my address…!

OP posts:
Fourkgtogo · 05/05/2026 13:24

I’d just let the stuff go today

Bluegreenbird · 05/05/2026 13:25

The said tomorrow so I’d give them until tomorrow. Not everyone has their phone with them all day.

tnorfotkcab · 05/05/2026 13:26

Yes just message saying sorry it's gone.

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 05/05/2026 13:26

Give this person all the stuff.

In the meantime another person has messaged saying they want to take the lot today as well as about 6 other items I’ve got lis

You snooze you lose

Message OG perosn and say items have now been collected / are gone

YoullWishYourLifeAway · 05/05/2026 13:27

Bluegreenbird · 05/05/2026 13:25

The said tomorrow so I’d give them until tomorrow. Not everyone has their phone with them all day.

This.

You agreed tomorrow so, if they don’t collect tomorrow, say the other person can come back for them. I get a sketchy signal in my office so wouldn’t necessarily get a message until after a 10 hour shift if it was a work day.

Roads · 05/05/2026 13:29

It's free you don't get to ask someone to hold it until it's convenient for you to collect. Let the other person pick it all up and maybe next time the first person will stop thinking she's doing someone a favour by picking it up at all.

AgnesMcDoo · 05/05/2026 13:29

You agreed with the first person tomorrow.

it would be pretty shitty behaviour to go back on that

woowu · 05/05/2026 13:32

You agreed to collection tomorrow, tomorrow hasn’t happened yet so why are you asking how long people would give? You have already given until tomorrow. I wouldn’t have agreed to that in the first place, but as you have I think you should stand by it.

SnappyQuoter · 05/05/2026 13:33

You agreed to tomorrow, and you don’t need to reconfirm that. The curse of mobile phones I guess, everyone thinks they should reconfirm everything even after it’s already been arranged.

There isn’t any rules here but, if you’re a decent person, you stick to your commitments. Tell the second person they can come and get the stuff if it doesn’t go tomorrow.

CurlewKate · 05/05/2026 13:34

You agreed to tomorrow. It’s a bit shitty not to wait til then

BleedinglyObvious · 05/05/2026 13:36

Message Person A saying you can't hold them and they're no longer available.
Give them to Person B.

Zov · 05/05/2026 13:36

As people have said, give them til tomorrow lunchtime. Message them again, and say they have til 1pm tomorrow to get the stuff - otherwise someone else is coming to get it.

spiderlight · 05/05/2026 13:36

You have to at least wait until the time you'd arranged with them tomorrow, surely?

Sprinkleofspice · 05/05/2026 13:37

I would wait until tomorrow morning, I think that’s a fair enough time for the original person to reply. After 24 hours from the message and no reply on the morning of, I would assume they’re not coming and the second person can have the lot

Original poster
kittykatlover · 05/05/2026 13:38

Yep I agree with the comments - I feel wrong giving it away just because they haven’t responded yet. I do think it would be courteous of person A to text me sometime this evening to confirm, given we arranged this 10 days ago, and I myself would do so in their position. But maybe they are a teacher or in another job where they can’t check their phone today.

I will wait until tomorrow.

OP posts:
BleedinglyObvious · 05/05/2026 13:40

@kittykatlover , they won't respond.
I've had no shows.
One was from a single mum who was desperate for something. I thought I could go without mine seeing as she was desperate. She never showed up.

honeylulu · 05/05/2026 14:05

When I first used to give away stuff I was rigid about waiting for the original person I'd agreed to have it. But more than half the time they would not turn up/ go silent when I tried to confirm arrangements. So if I got the chance to offload more easily in the meantime I would.

My friend gave me a tip which was to send a further message (to save them the trip just in case they were still planning to collect) to say oh I'm so sorry my husband took the wrong bag to the tip/dropped it and broke it so I no longer have it. I know it's lying and a bit crap of me but so many of these people were time wasting pains in the arse!

Original poster
kittykatlover · 05/05/2026 14:10

You could be right @BleedinglyObviousthey might not respond. They messaged me quite a few times to arrange so I’m going to give them the benefit of the doubt even though they might be a time-waster. They seemed genuine in their messages.

OP posts:
Flyingtime · 05/05/2026 14:28

I am a bit jaded on this front having spent time making arrangements with timewasters in the last couple of weeks. I changed some items to a penny as had seen a tip saying people time waste more for freebies, but seems they just time waste anyway. Why can’t people just say sorry I don’t want this anymore. We left some outdoor toys on the driveway by our bins in the end. They went quickly. In your scenario, I would wait for person A, but message person B and say you’ve arranged for person A to collect, but if she’s a no show is person b able to collect by such and such time. Good luck!

inmyhair · 05/05/2026 14:35

kittykatlover · 05/05/2026 13:22

Doing a big clearout and listed a load of different baby stuff on Freecycle. A person “reserved” a bundle of baby clothes last week (Mon 27/4) and asked to come by tomorrow to collect, to which I’ve agreed.

I texted this person this morning at 9am to reconfirm. As yet no response.

In the meantime another person has messaged saying they want to take the lot today as well as about 6 other items I’ve got listed. this would be great as I could get rid of the lot in one go!

I’ve texted person A again this lunchtime asking them to confirm tomorrow. How long should I give them before giving everything to person B?

Also I gave person A my address…!

Just give them to person A.

I get round the "giving people my address" issue by giving out my postcode only and asking them to message me just before they're leaving and I'll give them the house number. Learnt that the hard way.

ifonly4 · 05/05/2026 14:42

I'd contact the first person and tell them you have someone else interested - for that reason you'd appreciate if they could confirm by 6pm if they will collect or not tomorrow. If you don't hear, then contact the other person and set something up. Having said that, the other way to look at it is if the items are free, there's surely another time in the next week they or someone on their behalf could collect.

KilkennyCats · 05/05/2026 14:45

You’ve already agreed tomorrow, op. They’re not late!

LumpyandBumps · 05/05/2026 14:58

I have given lots of things away or sold very cheaply.
I have to confess that my standards have dropped over the years due to poor behaviour from others.
If someone tries to arrange a collection time more than a day or so in advance I now tell them to check with me the day before they wish to collect as I want the item/s gone ASAP and if someone else can collect sooner I will give the item to them.
I just can’t be doing with getting loads of enquiries and keeping track of lots of ‘reserved’ stuff, which is often not collected as agreed. Once it’s been collected I can just mark as gone.
In this case though OP has agreed to wait and it seems reasonable to keep to that.
I would love to know if they actually do collect!

longtompot · 05/05/2026 14:59

@kittykatlover Im glad you are waiting until tomorrow, and I hope they aren't a time waster, though if they are at least you have someone else in line. I organised to pick up a duvet cover from near me, a few years ago but still annoys me when I think about it. I messaged on the day to say I would be there approx time but this was dependent on my mum and a last minute gp appointment and could I let her know when I was free. The person was fine with this. I messaged as soon as I could and she had let it go to someone else!

Bubblewrapart · 06/05/2026 19:40

Edited as I realised this thread was from yesterday.

Did they show up?!