Is it normal to drift apart from friends in your 30s?

[ThisPoisedCyanMember]

Hello all,
Not sure where this best fits, but looking for some advice/solidarity. I'm 35, in a committed relationship, but not married and no children yet. Until a few years ago, I had a really good friendship group, we've been friends since school, so for well over 20 years. Since we've hit our 30s people seem to have settled down, and just dont seem to make an effort anymore and we've grown apart. Half have children, half dont. It's one of their hen dos this weekeend and I'm finding myself wondering if were even actually friends anymore. We have a group chat, but I only talk to one of them 1:1 regulalry outside of this. Even my best friend, I've come to realise only makes an effort when its convinnient for her. (She will be driving past my house to get to the hen do and hasn't even offered a lift). Iv'e not seen her 1:1 in over 2 years as she's always too busy (but have seen her as part of a group) She made a big deal of doing more together this year at new year, but nothings changed. She's now very close to her SIL which I don't begrudge, but have come to accept that were not best friends anymore, which makes me sad and I feel really lonely. I guess I just don't feel like I've got any real close friends anymore. Is it normal to drift in your 30s once people get content with SOs and busy with children? How do you make friends as an adult? I do plenty of clubs and activities, but never seem to find anyone I've really hit it off with as a friendship.

I'm a similar age but with DC, and if I'm honest, I've only remained close to friends who also have DC. It's not that I think any less of my child free friends, I love them very much and am always delighted when I do see them, but we have very different lives that just don't fit well together.

They arn't going to want to come sit in a softplay or playground and chat while the kids play, like I do with my fellow parent friends, and I can't bring the kids along to nice meals or nights out (no childcare). Maybe we'll reconnect when life allows.

I think friendships change and it can be harder to see people as often or 1:1 as we all have more and more to occupy our time. I have my own friends and family plus DH’s friend and family. Then there’s lots of weddings and hen parties etc. And as friends start having kids it can get more difficult to meet up, the same when people move. I have lots of friends who 90% of the time I only see in groups, but it’s been that way for a while so I don’t really mind. They tend to be the ones who live further away though, I’m sure it would be different if we could do a more casual dinner after work or something.

I think it is normal for friendships to evolve and change as everyone's lives change.

They change when you leave school.
(If you went) they change when you leave University.
They change as people settle into relationships and get their own places to live.
They very much change once people start having children.

Doesn't mean you have to lose the friendships though.
I am out the other side of the "children taking over your life" stage and have picked up lots of old (and new) friendships now we have time to breathe and no longer need babysitters or to include dc in our social lives.