Can travel costs or debts affect CMS payments for a non-resident parent?

[Lizchaz]

I'd welcome any advice on if and how friend can get debts and travel costs for contact taken into account for CMS payment please?

there's a long story behind this for context.

A friend of mine is struggling financially and is resigning himself to having to accept the situation. I'm wondering if anyone can give me any advice in connection with non resident parent CMS payments please.

He was in a relationship for 6 years. She moved about 200 miles to where he lives to be with him a few months after meeting. They bought a house, had a child who is now 18 months and had booked a wedding for this year. He works full time, she was working part time.

4 months ago she went back home to visit family, which she has done a couple of times a year. She then decided she wasn't coming back and that she and their child were going to stay there. My friend had no warning and thought they had a good relationship.

For 2 weeks she was backward and forwards crying down the phone saying she loves him and wants to come home, then the next day she loves him but wants to stay with parents. Suddenly after 2 weeks she's in a new relationship and starts to be awkward about access and wanting to sell the house as soon as possible to take her name off so she can get local authority housing.

Between them they had previously got into a bit of debt for which they both have IVAs. Although my friend can afford the mortgage by himself, he can't remortgage due to the IVA to take her name off the house. The property has negative equity.

Friend has been going to pick son up, bring home home to spend time together then doing the return trip. Obviously due to the distance and cost of fuel it's not cheap.

The ex has now made a claim for CMS, which my friend is happy to pay to support his child. He is going to struggle hugely after this. He has tried using the app to see if he can reduce payments at all but is told no. He thinks that he's just going to have to accept this and work additional hours to try to keep his head above water.

Ex has left him with other joint debt that he is paying, the mortgage which he is paying to prevent the house from being repossessed and them both having to file for bankruptcy, and the cost of travel to see his child.

I was very friendly with ex and spent a lot of time with them as a couple and a family. I know you can never tell what goes on behind closed doors but really don't think there were any underlying issues. The only trigger I can think of is that ex was at risk of redundancy, which she had taken very badly.

In the mean time ex appears to be living it up with the new boyfriend who is wealthy, 'living' at her parents and claiming universal credit.

My friend has been screwed over every which way. I feel so sorry for him and have know him for a long time. He's a genuinely nice guy.

as far as i know contact and child support are seperate issues and they do not take contact costs or debts into account. he could ask for a travel variation assessment explaining how far he has to travel for access but i don't know that will help. they just look at what he earns and if he does longer hours they will just take more money from him plus 20% ontop costs if she does it through collect and pay rather than direct pay with him

If this happened very recently he could argue in court that moving their child 200 miles away is unreasonable. The mother can’t be stopped from moving, but she can be stopped from taking their child with her. If he won, he would either be the primary residential parent or she could choose to move closer and be the primary parent or split evenly.

Thank you for your advice. It seems so unfair. She's turned his world upside down and he's had no choice in the matter. Sounds as though he's right and he's just got to accept it.

He wouldn't go through the courts to contest custody or the fact she's moved away. He feels that their child has already had a lot of change to deal with and does not want the situation to become acrimonious.

If he’s just going to roll over and accept it without even trying then he doesn’t get to play the poor me it’s so unfair card. There are options, he could appeal the amount, he could ask CMS about contact costs, he could go court. Yeh it’s not easy to do but theirs options.

If she moved 200 miles away the court may order her to be responsible for the costs of contact, or at least half of them.

The matter of the debt and the mortgage would be separate, but she still theoretically owes her half of the mortgage. Whose name is the debt in? He could try and take her to small claims court if he can prove that half is hers and that she had agreed to pay her contribution

So is he going to move closer to her? Or just be a part time dad forever? Why role over and accept someone taking your child 200 miles away for no good reason.

I don’t think he can get help with CMS, did she just go straight to CMS without even asking him to help? It sounds as though things are already quite unfriendly on her part

He needs to pay his half of the mortgage and point the mortgage company at her for the second half!

She can’t claim UC for long if shes on the mortgage they will refuse to pay after 6 months if the house isnt out of her name/sold. She sounds evil.

^ this.

He's still reeling from the shock of it all. It happened so quickly.

Debts are in his name for joint purchases. Is the mortgage not a joint and several liability? If he only pays half he is still responsible for the other half? He's desperate in the short term not to lose his house as he's lost so much already. Also he has nowhere else to go. Rented accommodation would be more than his mortgage, unless it was a shared house. He can't do this as it's not a suitable environment when he has contact, including overnights, with his child.

He is going to seek legal advice but not certain how far he's going to be able to take it as he simply cannot afford it. I'm guessing this isn't a cost that can be deducted from maintenance payments.

He's willing to work extra to cover costs, but as mentioned in a previous post, they'd deduct maintenance from that. It's so demoralising.

The whole situation just feels hugely unfair. There's a small child right in the middle of this and it'll be a difficult balance to do what's right for them and what's fair on the parent. Especially when the other parent is not trying to do the same thing. My friends focus at the moment is making sure his child has a good life.

The people I know that moved so far away have been the ones responsible for travel, regardless which parent it is.

It seems very unfair that she can just up sticks and move his young child so far away. He could contest that in court surely? It’s not in the child’s best interests at all.

How often is he having contact? What will he do when the child has hobbies on weekends and no longer wants to spend weekends with dad.

Contact has been every other weekend. I don't think he's thought that far ahead yet. I'll let him know about travel costs. Looks like he's going to have to somehow find the money to go to court.

Always make sure the mortgage and council tax are paid in full. These are non-negotiable.

just make sure when the divorce happens, the dates of separation are made clear if any accounting (can) be made between the parties.

if these costs aren’t paid by either party, repossession could occur.