If you earn ALOT more than your dh, does this affect how you feel about him?

[Whatdoyouthinktothis]

Just been listening to Scott Galloway

I've never looked down on gh, I have earned more than him, but only by say 20 percent so I wouldn't say that's a huge difference
Yet I had much higher prospects, but it didn't put me off him
Dh now earns much more than anyone would have expected when he was young

According to Scott if a woman earns more than a man he's three times more likely to have erectile dysfunction
Likelihood of divorce doubles

I just retired last week but until then I was earning considerably more than DH. Neither of us gave it any thought at all, other than that he was quite pleased the onus wasn't all on him, as it was when I was a sahp for several years after dc came along.

I earn about 2.5 times as much and that is likely to become 4-5 times as much one day. I think it annoys my in-laws more than DH, they used to imply I spent ‘his’ money until I sarcastically replied it’s more likely he is spending mine……(not that we think like this at all, everything is joint). He gets to live in a lovely house and go on lots of holidays. I would say we do about equal in terms of childcare and housework. If our earnings were the other way around it would probably be me doing most of it, as that’s how it seems to land for women.

I have pretty much always out-earned my DH but our money has always been pooled anyway. He doesn’t seem to care. He more than pulls his weight at home and I wouldn’t be able to do the job I do if he didn’t.

He was a SAHD for a while and he did struggle with the idea of not contributing financially even though he was contributing so much more to our family by not working.

He’s genuinely proud of me, we work in the same industry and when he tells people what I do they all ask him why he’s still working 😂 and he thinks it’s funny.

Men who have a problem with their DP out-earning are silly little boys and I could see their attitude rather than the salary would be causing erectile problems!

I remember when I got a promotion in a highly competitive field. I was so excited I got the job. We had a young child and I thought this will be so great for our family. I rang my husband straight away to share the good news.
He couldn’t even manage a congratulations he was so livid. He put the phone down because he had to ring his boss and demand a pay rise entirely based on the fact his wife was now paid more than him. He didn’t get it. It made life insufferable as he then just spent everything I earned out of jealousy even though it went into the family pot.
One of the many reasons we are now divorced.

I agree! DH loves telling people at work what I do (as his line of work it is common for the spouse to not work) he gets quite smug about it because he can see how much more financially secure we are for it and the quality of life than if we were just relying on his wage like many of his colleagues do.

I earn 3 times ish to DH not an issue for us we split house bills he has his money, I have my money we don’t think about who is paying for what when we go out. When he retires he’ll have a 35 year civil service pension worth about 4 times my private. Swings and roundabouts isn’t it surely in the early days you figured out career and earning potential?

How ridiculous. I earn more than double what my Dh does and it isn’t the slightest bit of an issue. I pay all the bills, which then leaves us with roughly the same amount.

My salary is approximately 5 times what it was when we met as my career has taken an unexpected path and I earn about double what he does. He is self employed in a creative industry with a job that when people meet him think is incredibly cool. He earns well anyway but I love the security of knowing I’d be ok if we broke up and we’re both very supportive and proud of what each other have achieved.

Are you me? Lol.

I earn very well, but because everyone around me is in a relationship with someone in the same / a similar profession, I feel poor, even compared to the juniors. I still feel like I’m winning though, because I’ve got DP who’s lovely. 😎

If you earn so much shouldn’t you know it’s A LOT not ALOT?!

No, I wouldn't have married him if it had been an issue for me.

I don't think any woman really respects a man who earns less.

They say the do . . .

But . . .

I'm sorry you have such a poor experience of humanity. Please don't tar us all with your depressing brush though.

It's just human nature. You don't need to be sorry for me.

My husband is in the military, he is sexy as fuck, strong, knows his way around a rifle, has far more impact in his job than I do even in my Very Important job. I assure you, I respect him plenty.

It's not "human nature", it's in your head. I really am sorry that you've had such a bad time that you think you need to be rich to be respected. I hope you meet and learn to respect a variety of people. Rich or otherwise.

I like to be the breadwinner and at times have earned up to triple his salary. My dh contributes a lot in other ways to all elements of our life and honestly I couldn’t be without him. I’m really proud he’s my husband.

I earn over double what dh does and it's not a problem in the slightest. He out earned me for many years. It doesn't really feel noticeable because we've always pooled our earnings in proportion to how much we earned and we've always made it so we both have the same amount to spend ourselves each month. Also, we do a very similar job in fact he's more senior than I am in his company so we're kind of equals in the day to day level of responsibility at work which might help?

I have a similar situation to this but I’m the academic / career high flyer although he’s also had a successful career. On paper (salary) I earn double what he does but his job (still senior and highly paid but he owns part of the business so more up and down) has allowed him to spend time on other investments which earn us a passive income and will generate returns in the future. So I would say his contribution is far greater than mine ultimately. He’s also much more financially savvy than I am.

I do feel pressure to keep up my career and earnings but he feels the same. Neither of us is slacking off at all.

I have always earned more than my OH (although not by a massive amount) but it has never been an issue, everything just goes into the joint account and is "ours"...... not "mine" & "his".
Even though I am now retired (I stopped work at 57 and my OH is 3yrs younger) he went PT (2-days/week) so until he draws his pensions, I am still "earning" more than him.

Doesn't worry me and it doesn't worry him.

I've outearned DH for 15+ years and no, it doesn't bother us.

Why do you think they wouldn't?

ALOT?

scott seems to have been married twice and had a wife 17 years his junior…. Didn’t become a partner until he was in his forties, a luxury women may not have to delay parenthood till 40s

so is like to ask him what he thinks about that
and the power dynamic of a partner 17 years your junior
so say he was 40, wife number two would have been only 23 🤔🤔🤔

Came up on my TikTok