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Original poster

Dsd ill and I’m panicking

56 replies

tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 20:54

Had a terrible headache all night, went away with paracetamol but still lingered, it’s back now. She has a temp, aching all over but what’s worried me is this headache and her neck is aching too. She can kiss her knee and put her chin to her chest, how comfortably I don’t really know as she’s got adhd so hard getting proper answers out of her. She said when she put her chin to her chest it hurt all down her back in a line, I’m worrying about meningitis! Would she still be able to text me by now if she had it ? Started feeling ill about 8pm last night

OP posts:
Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 21:49

MissMoneyFairy · 17/04/2026 21:47

But hes her parent, has he spoken to his daughter or her grandparents . How much has he had to drink

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Of course he has ! What’s the issue ? Am I not allowed to care because I’m only the stepmother?!

OP posts:
Gonk123 · 17/04/2026 21:49

can you not drive him there?

SilverBlue56 · 17/04/2026 21:50

Why did you post on here if you don't want to follow the advice?

Say you talk yourself into believing she's fine and it's just another virus and she goes to sleep, with you KNOWING she has had a severe headache, neck pain and fever, and then she doesn't wake up?

Google what happened to Michael Rosen's son

If they won't take her, you call an ambulance to the house.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General health
horseplay12 · 17/04/2026 21:56

If you were concerned enough to ask in the first place, why aren’t you acting on what absolutely everyone has said? She needs to be seen by a medical professional and the sooner the better.

Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:01

Gonk123 · 17/04/2026 21:49

can you not drive him there?

Don’t drive

OP posts:
Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:03

horseplay12 · 17/04/2026 21:56

If you were concerned enough to ask in the first place, why aren’t you acting on what absolutely everyone has said? She needs to be seen by a medical professional and the sooner the better.

We don’t have her grandparents numbers, her mum would hang up the phone, all contact has been through dsd for years, other than explain how serious meningitis is to dsd which we have done, and which dsd has told her mum and nan what we’ve said and who have both said it’s flu

OP posts:
Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:04

She is also now eating so surely she isn’t dying ?

OP posts:
MissMoneyFairy · 17/04/2026 22:06

tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 21:49

Of course he has ! What’s the issue ? Am I not allowed to care because I’m only the stepmother?!

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This isn't about being a step mum or attempting to create a stepmum bashing thread, Its about a sick girl who needs to see a doctor.

Gonk123 · 17/04/2026 22:08

If you’re that worried find a way to get there…or get I. Touch with the grandparents - ask her to put them in the phone when you ring. Get a friend or family member to drive you to her. Get an uber. No one on here can diagnose.

Shufflebumnessie · 17/04/2026 22:13

tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 21:41

Yes it does
not sure I’ll ask, she is drinking squash
she is aching all over just lying in bed

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That all sounds positive. The fact that her temperature is responding to paracetamol, that she's alert and able to drink (& I saw in your newer post, she's eating too) is good.
Obviously if your concerns persist then she really needs to be seen by a doctor.

Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:19

MissMoneyFairy · 17/04/2026 22:06

This isn't about being a step mum or attempting to create a stepmum bashing thread, Its about a sick girl who needs to see a doctor.

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Read recent updates please she is now eating, fever is responding to paracetamol, no sickness, not affected by lights, not unable to move and not confused

OP posts:
Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:20

Shufflebumnessie · 17/04/2026 22:13

That all sounds positive. The fact that her temperature is responding to paracetamol, that she's alert and able to drink (& I saw in your newer post, she's eating too) is good.
Obviously if your concerns persist then she really needs to be seen by a doctor.

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Of course, thank you. I said before this started about 8pm last night and as I understand it meningitis develops rapidly so I think by now she’d be seriously unwell wouldn’t she ?

OP posts:
Shufflebumnessie · 17/04/2026 22:32

tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:20

Of course, thank you. I said before this started about 8pm last night and as I understand it meningitis develops rapidly so I think by now she’d be seriously unwell wouldn’t she ?

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It does develop rapidly. When DS had it, he escalated from a slight temperature to extremely poorly within a few hours. Unfortunately he was misdiagnosed by 3 different doctors over the course of 48 hours (they kept insisting it was Gastroenteritis & dehydration, and kept dismissing my concerns). Thankfully a junior doctor at the hospital immediately recognised what was wrong and treatment was started. I dread to think of the outcome if he'd been left undiagnosed for any longer.

Obviously you're up against some resistance but if her symptoms persist (or get worse) your DSD & her grandparents really do need to understand that she may need medical assistance. Fingers crossed she'll be on the mend very soon.

Driftingawaynow · 17/04/2026 22:34

I believe if you phone NHS111 and they think she needs to be assessed, they can get somebody to actually phone her phone. I’ve been in a similar situation myself.

chubb4 · 17/04/2026 22:43

I do hope for her sake that it is just a virus because it seems like, for whatever reason, none of the adults in her life are going to advocate for her or ensure she gets medical treatment. If in any doubt I would always err on the side of caution and get mine seen, especially with the recent news.

I get that you’re up against resistance but if you were really panicking you would find a way to get help to her. Hopefully she is on the mend.

Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:44

Shufflebumnessie · 17/04/2026 22:32

It does develop rapidly. When DS had it, he escalated from a slight temperature to extremely poorly within a few hours. Unfortunately he was misdiagnosed by 3 different doctors over the course of 48 hours (they kept insisting it was Gastroenteritis & dehydration, and kept dismissing my concerns). Thankfully a junior doctor at the hospital immediately recognised what was wrong and treatment was started. I dread to think of the outcome if he'd been left undiagnosed for any longer.

Obviously you're up against some resistance but if her symptoms persist (or get worse) your DSD & her grandparents really do need to understand that she may need medical assistance. Fingers crossed she'll be on the mend very soon.

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That must’ve been absolutely terrifying for you, I’m so sorry you went through that and really glad your ds pulled through. Just awful.

Thank you for the advice and we are going to keep in touch through the night and make sure nothing has changed.

OP posts:
Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:45

Driftingawaynow · 17/04/2026 22:34

I believe if you phone NHS111 and they think she needs to be assessed, they can get somebody to actually phone her phone. I’ve been in a similar situation myself.

This is really good to know, thank you !

OP posts:
Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 22:46

chubb4 · 17/04/2026 22:43

I do hope for her sake that it is just a virus because it seems like, for whatever reason, none of the adults in her life are going to advocate for her or ensure she gets medical treatment. If in any doubt I would always err on the side of caution and get mine seen, especially with the recent news.

I get that you’re up against resistance but if you were really panicking you would find a way to get help to her. Hopefully she is on the mend.

If she wasn’t eating and she didn’t tell me she felt abit better and that her headache had eased then things would be different

OP posts:
GreenCandleWax · 17/04/2026 23:02

tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 21:40

She’s told her mum now who has said it’ll probably just be Covid or the flu

Not wanting to worry you unduly, but there is a meningitis outbreak, fairly small, in two schools in Weymouth. Are you anywhere near there?

Original poster
tummytucklipo · 17/04/2026 23:11

GreenCandleWax · 17/04/2026 23:02

Not wanting to worry you unduly, but there is a meningitis outbreak, fairly small, in two schools in Weymouth. Are you anywhere near there?

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Nowhere near luckily

OP posts:
Sassylovesbooks · 17/04/2026 23:11

I am a meningitis and septicemia survivor here. I didn't have sensitivity to light as one of my symptoms. Not everyone experiences the same symptoms or all symptoms. She needs to go to A&E to be checked over. I had the disease 4 days before being admitted to hospital; by this time I was extremely unwell.

Original poster
tummytucklipo · 18/04/2026 08:30

Sassylovesbooks · 17/04/2026 23:11

I am a meningitis and septicemia survivor here. I didn't have sensitivity to light as one of my symptoms. Not everyone experiences the same symptoms or all symptoms. She needs to go to A&E to be checked over. I had the disease 4 days before being admitted to hospital; by this time I was extremely unwell.

Could you share you experience please ?

she says this morning her throat is very sore and finding it hard to swallow because it really hurts, I don’t think these symptoms point to meningitis do they ? More viral?

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chubb4 · 18/04/2026 08:52

tummytucklipo · 18/04/2026 08:30

Could you share you experience please ?

she says this morning her throat is very sore and finding it hard to swallow because it really hurts, I don’t think these symptoms point to meningitis do they ? More viral?

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Are you a doctor? Nobody can diagnose her but a professional. Even if it is ‘just’ a virus it would be beneficial for her to be seen. I don’t understand why you’ve posted when you aren’t going to follow anyone’s advice. We can’t just go along with you and say ‘yeah don’t worry it’s a virus she’ll be fine.’

Original poster
tummytucklipo · 18/04/2026 09:02

chubb4 · 18/04/2026 08:52

Are you a doctor? Nobody can diagnose her but a professional. Even if it is ‘just’ a virus it would be beneficial for her to be seen. I don’t understand why you’ve posted when you aren’t going to follow anyone’s advice. We can’t just go along with you and say ‘yeah don’t worry it’s a virus she’ll be fine.’

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Can you not be so rude in your responses please ? I have posted in good faith and have been met with only one person being rational. Dsd is nearly 100 miles away and we are looking after her the best we can right now with instructions on how to feel more comfortable. She may have had a headache and her neck felt sore, but it wasn’t just her neck, her whole body was aching, virus’ also cause headaches, not just meningitis. Two main tests for neck flexibility have been done comfortably. When I have called 111 before for my own dd the main thing they wanted to know was if she could touch her chin to chest, as soon as confirmed she could they said she hasn’t got meningitis. So I won’t be calling an ambulance to the house as she isn’t getting any worse, she is fine with light, headache has eased, she is feeling better with paracetamol, managing to eat small amounts, her main symptoms now are a very sore throat, no spots are present so she wouldn’t be prescribed antibiotics either. So it seems dsd has a nasty virus for which the doctors would say wait it out and let it run its course.

OP posts:
columnatedruinsdomino · 18/04/2026 09:41

A worrying time but sounds like she’s turned a corner. Is dad on his way to see her? At least then he can see her himself and make any further decisions.