Turning 50, feel terrible, any inspiring stories?

[Rollypollypuddingandpie]

I’ll be 50 later this year and feel terrible about it, that there’s nothing to look forward to and that I have made a mess of my life.

I would love to hear your stories of inspiration.
At the moment I just feel sad.

Turned 50 last year and decided a number of things.
1 - i really am a grown up so can be who I want
2- as a said grown up I can go away, do trips without feeling guilty about spending the money
3- kids left or leaving home so I can plan my time without considering them.
4- i can wear what I want when I want
5- i am actually quite nice so I want to be with people who think so and who I think are nice too
6- re kindle lost friends- it is worth revisiting if you have more time
7- actually I am good at my job and I deserve to do well. I can take on more now or make changes
8- find the exercise you love not what you think you should do
9- stop feeling guilty about everything
10- life is for living so embrace the you that you are today.

treat it as a positive!!!

My very best years have been those since I tuned 50, and there have been quite a lot of them now. I started a new job just before I turned 50, loved it until I retired, and am having a ball in retirement.

I’ve emailed a therapist and a local Pilates instructor this morning. Feel loads better about life today 😊

I am 50 this year too. Have really upped my game with strength training and started weight loss injections as l want to feel fabulous as l enter the next decade!

Please appreciate being 50.. seems like yesterday for me and next year I’m 60. You have so much time ahead of you still. My 50’s were the best, most content decade of my life.

I'm not totally new to it, I used to be a gym member when I was younger. But after a good 10-12 years away I was a bit of a blob.

If you've never been a gym member before, I'd say ask around and try and find a nice low key gym, as local as possible to you to make it as convenient as possible, and book some personal training and ask them to give you a few introductory sessions. Let them know you just want to know how to use the equipment and get some pointers on how to build a routine that suits you.

Ah this one’s a bit of a tough read. Life can feel quite small and heavy sometimes, especially when you’re carrying worry for your kids as well as yourself. (I'm 52 and I have a child with mental health issues so things can feel very tricky some times).

I don’t think it always has to be about big, dramatic happiness. Sometimes it’s smaller than that, like a decent day, a laugh with someone, a bit of breathing space where things feel lighter for a minute. That all counts.

And for what it’s worth, I do think life has a habit of shifting when you’re not paying it full attention. Not in a ‘everything magically fixes itself’ way, but in a ‘things aren’t always stuck like this forever’ way. At least, that is what I think on tough days.

You sound thoughtful and very tuned into the people you love – that’s not nothing, even if it feels like it some days.

xx

Thank you for this.

My two children are both ASD, oldest very depressed at the moment. Getting him to leave his room is a battle. Youngest struggling with eating issues and school attendance but is otherwise out and about. It’s a lot to carry and I think I am worn out by it all.

Helpful to just think about small moments, something about turning fifty made me look at the landscape of my life and it felt kind of bleak. But close up there are things to enjoy. And I need to take more control. Things have been happen at me my whole life. I need better boundaries and better self esteem!

So did I !

Glad to hear you’re feeling more positive today OP.

sounds like you’re worn out, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Keep looking for small ways in which you can replenish your energy - hoping therapist and Pilates will be a start but don’t only depend on them - keep looking

Please allow me to interject with my own 'turning 50' story ! In September of that year, I entered a very posh university to start a degree in English literature. To finance this, I took in a lodger. One week into freshers, the lodger announced she was leaving, having developed an allergy to my cat. I never accepted male lodgers as a rule, but needs must, and so in he came. Those were the most magical, wonderful,😊 years of my life

I got out of a marriage that had turned very bad, lost six stone, strengthened my friendships massively, created a life full of fun and adventure, and met a wonderful man. I am loving my 50s!