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Friend depressed

28 replies

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 09/04/2026 12:03

A male friend of mine is seriously depressed. Wife left him with their 2 boys last year. At age 10 his mum and dad died within months of each other not suicide or drugs alcohol related just normal family. Grandparents then brought him up.

He posted on Facebook like he was very depressed, almost suicidal. He is my DB primary school close friend but they’ve kept in touch since. He’s usually a cheerful upbeat man. I know 2 men in local area to me who’ve ended their lives in past 3 years.

I don’t live near this man but may be down there soon so all I could put were caring words. Is there anything else I could do? He’s by seaside.

think his parents died suddenly or were ill and he wasn’t told. 😢

OP posts:
Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 09/04/2026 22:56

FindmypalNas · 09/04/2026 13:07

I understand your concern.
Do you and this friend chat/keep in touch? It is not clear from your post if he is your friend or your DB's friend.
What does your DB think?

Is this friend working?
You could invite him down to you for a couple of days (change of scene) and do some fun things im your area.. maybe invite other friends that may know him to join in?

I have a friend who lost his job 2 years ago and has slowly become more withdrawn from society but always kept in touch and we spoke weekly. He has gradually gotten more depressed and has said some things that have worried me. I have not heard from him since January and tomorrow I am going to Germany to look for him/check in on him. Like your friend/your DB's friend, he was also a lively, upbeat, go-getter person. I understand your concern.

My DB doesn’t know. I texted him to say maybe he should ring him.

OP posts:
FindmypalNas · 09/04/2026 23:04

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 09/04/2026 22:56

My DB doesn’t know. I texted him to say maybe he should ring him.

I think that's a good way to go about it, as he is actually your brother's friend.
You are only Facebook friends so it may be a bit weird for him to come down for a visit etc. I also wasn't suggesting he stays at your home, just to be clear.
But it's right that you have told your brother, that's his friend.

Well done on being so kind and looking out for him. The support of friends and family is invaluable in these situations. It can make a positive difference to how the person then interacts with the world... can even encourage them to seek help or accept help. Depression is horrible. Grief is horrible. It changes how people would normally behave.
Good luck.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 09/04/2026 23:08

FindmypalNas · 09/04/2026 23:04

I think that's a good way to go about it, as he is actually your brother's friend.
You are only Facebook friends so it may be a bit weird for him to come down for a visit etc. I also wasn't suggesting he stays at your home, just to be clear.
But it's right that you have told your brother, that's his friend.

Well done on being so kind and looking out for him. The support of friends and family is invaluable in these situations. It can make a positive difference to how the person then interacts with the world... can even encourage them to seek help or accept help. Depression is horrible. Grief is horrible. It changes how people would normally behave.
Good luck.

Yeah much as I like him I’m not sure I would have him to stay. Spoke to my boyfriend whose mum has a holiday home nearby and asked if we could pop in and see him and he said yes. Prob next month.

I would just feel devastated if another person I knew took their own life and had asked for help. Which he has done. Albeit through a Facebook post.

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