Losing my job - what to expect / do in the next day and weeks?

[NewRedHot]

Sorry for rambling, this is very fresh and I can’t stop crying, even though it’s not about the money, at least in the short term.

I have been with this large corporation for 9 years, moved there following my manager from my previous job. He has left 3 years ago (exited because his new manager didn’t like him), and I have stepped into his role (promoted), with another promotion that followed early last year. The business has been through two rounds of restructuring, lots of people treated like shit, I was one of the few managers that lasted through it all. Until today… My new manager of 6 months has called me into a scheduled appraisal, HR in presence, and in short said that though my performance is outstanding and my team always deliver and he cannot fault me for anything, the business requires someone with technical background in this role. He would have liked to repurpose me but there is nothing available. I will be getting an offer to leave. They have cut me off all systems. I have a company car, phone, laptop, all to be returned in a few weeks. My team have been given a cryptic message about unexpected leave - there have been so many of these over the years, they will guess what has happened.

So, I drove home and I don’t know what to do with myself. I am 47, mid level manager, am I ever going to get a good job? Am I too old? My mind rambles between jobs I need to do / things to investigate - my pension? Car lease? Buying a phone? Updating my CV? I just want to cry and go to sleep. I feel waves of relief because part of me knew this might happen as my manager was the first one ever that I didn’t get on well with, he has constantly criticised me, never thanked, subtle put down in every one to one, but because my numbers are good, I thought he was just going to bear with our differences.

I will seek legal advice (they are paying) but would appreciate anything reassuring from anyone who has been in this situation. How long did it take you to get a decent job? How did you cope with anxiety and emotional turmoil and fear of loss of earnings? How do I get through this in most effective way? I am so embarrassed to have lost my job. I don’t know how to tell DD and my parents. DH knows, and is very supportive, but that only makes me feel like a loser. How to stop crying?

So sorry to hear this OP.
please don’t be so hard on yourself. This isn’t a personal attack, it’s just business. It’s how it can go sometimes. Try not to take it personally, because it isn’t.

It’s ok to grieve and cry, let it out now. Then, when you’re ready, pick up your next plan. Assign 1-2 hours a day to search for a new role. That’s it. Spend the other time doing hobbies, the things you haven’t gotten too. See the new time as a short term gift to embrace.

This isn’t the end, it’s only beginning for you. ❤️

Thank you @EvolvedAlready for the kind words and a nice perspective. I am lucky for this to have happened on a glorious sunny day, so I have started to paint the fence. Bought the paint last week and was going to spend any free time on doing it, so today was a good day to start. It’s weird to be cut off in an instant from the people and business, so isolating, the hours are dragging… but hopefully tomorrow I will settle and make a plan. Made a call to a legal firm.

Try for some outplacement support as a part of your settlement. These companies can help create a current CV, interview techniques and how to look for another role.

You haven’t lost your job, you’ve been made redundant, I believe you can seek legal advice if needed and the company should pay for it. Might have changed now? Gov website has lots of info and calculators etc.

Been there. Found it hard. Sitting still
and being calm is hard so fence painting sounds good!

Don’t assume that you’re going to accept their first offer offer for redundancy. And let them know that too, via whatever grapevines you have. You’ll have seen a bit of action and know some stuff so they want to make it worth your while to sign something…

You sound amazing (painting the fence already!)

and please don’t worry about telling your parents and daughter, just be matter of fact and let them know. They’ll be sad for you but you have nothing to be embarrassed about.

sendings 🤗 hugs

Thank you all. It is not a redundancy - they will be replacing me with someone who has technical background, engineering qualifications. They would like to build more technical culture. So, this is a settlement conversation to get me to go without making a fuss. They will be paying for my legal advice too. It’s a huge knock to confidence; I have worked my socks off there and always delivered. He just does not want me there.

I have started two lists - one related to managing exit, another to job search as thoughts float into my head.

3 panels almost finished, drying lovely.

Try and stay positive. My husband had something similar (years ago) and his legal advice was excellent. As you’ve already been told, be prepared to negotiate and not settle on their first figure. In my husband’s case, it allowed him to start his own business.

There’s no shame in not having the technical experience - if that was really a requirement of the job then they should never have promoted you in the first place.

Hold your head high and look forward to a new future. Maybe, it’s the time to re-train into something you really want to do.

Good luck.

No advice OP, just a supporting message! Please dont feel bad telling your family. After the tears the anger and 'fxxk you' will no doubt come! I've only been through redundancy but do you have an idea of the financial package they will offer you, or what you would accept?. Sounds very wise to be taking legal advice. I really hope you go onto find something bigger and better

Get the largest settlement you can, which will give you room to breathe and think about next steps.

Think about what you really want to do next as this is an opportunity to get into something you really enjoy doing.

Good luck!

@Ilikewinter Thank you. I will know hopefully by the end of this week, they had nothing prepared for this meeting or for prompt follow up. And this is just typical of him.

ChatGPT tells me I can expect my notice and some amount for the inconvenience / keep me quiet because it’s not performance related. I should hope to be offered six months and will negotiate hard, including car allowance, and quarterly commission I should be paid (team hit targets).

You are in a better position with a settlement than if you were being made redundant as you will likely get a better payout. Things I would think about are:

1. If you have health care via your package, you can usually get what I think is called a continuation, which basically means a quote for you to oay for the same package you get via your company. This is usually better value than buying it yourself.
2. Make sure you stipulate that you need to agree the wording of the message that goes to the company. You want control of this for messaging, and any ongoing references you might want from individuals (the solicitor will help you word this).
3. Don't panic. The world has changed, but it isn't over. Leverage your network.
4. Look at 'fractional leadership' which is the buzz word for 'part time'. It is very lucrative, and very popular as a lot of companies are budget constrained.
5. Get your elevator pitch of your skill set fluent in your mind.
6. Brush up your CV. This needs to show what you can do, what impact you had, and companies where you did it. So many CVs I have seen over the years read like job descriptions. As an employer I want to know what you can do, not what your job involved. You need to get out of your comfort zone and not be shy here. Nobody else will sing your praises, you have to.
7. Leading on from 5 and 6, get fluent with a few examples of things you've done, achieved etc. Raised revenue by £xxx by doing yyy or cost saving of £xxx by doing yyy. That sort of thing.

Then enjoy the summer.

@HappiestSleeping Thank you so much, especially for pointing 4 to 7, I will make an effort with these.

I have bought a pair of fugly black shoes for a week long tradeshow this month, the comfiest I could find but really felt frumpy in the them. The monsters are on Vinted already.

How are you doing @NewRedHot? The sun is out where I live and we’re talking about fence panels so I thought of you! Hope settlement negotiations are doing well and in your favour.

@ChristmasLightsLover Hi, thank you so much for your message.

I have worked hard on and off for 3 days drafting and re-writing the response to their settlement offer. Somehow despite what was said, my work account was back accessible after 24 hours. I took all personal information needed to draft a strong response. As a result, they have come back increasing the offer by 1/3, without any negotiation, this extra will cover the personal car cost. I have signed, and waiting for my copy back. Bought the phone and laptop, and spent another 3 days updating CV and literally writing my answers to potential interview questions. Now rehearsing interviews and finetuning the replies in my head as I run, paint and do housework. So, it’s been a busy week, I have relaxed a little about money, GP put me on HRT at last, and I had one call with a recruiter keen to put me for a less paid, but a sound job. Going for a test drive tomorrow as will need to get my own car soon. DH has been brilliant. I have not yet spoken to my parents as they are away, but DD just shrugged. It made me realise that there are people who love me regardless of work, income etc. Thank you again!

This all sounds like a good outcome, @NewRedHot- may the days ahead being a good mix of interviews, fence painting, and regrouping to find something that works for you. Onwards!